Saving Khushi Part 14
Manmarziyaan (Lootera)
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Part 15.
This update is about the fact or process of doing something, typically to achieve an aim. It is also the way in which something has an effect or influence. A word that describes this is ACTION.
Hearing Anjali call, Chotey, and then hesitate to express her thoughts by just saying that she was thinking, Arnav encouraged her to open up by asking her to tell him what she wanted. Her hesitant, she wanted to learn painting, had Arnav tell her, if that was what she wanted he would arrange for someone to teach her at home, for Aman will be able to arrange things to satisfaction. But he was cut short by Anjali who told him softly but with a determination and a clear cut idea, that was not what she wanted. She needed to get out and see more of the world and its ways. She knows that they have evening classes at the nearby college. That was one step that was bound to please everyone, for it was a sign of control action of seizing her life into her hands by thinking for herself and aloud. Arnav felt overwhelmed to see his Di coming out of her cocoon and wanting to come out of her penchant to create the dream world of her own. With this development he now knew, that she was turning a new leaf and her zest to seek new pastures was a welcome change. Arnav promised her anything she wants could be materialized. All she needed was to state it and he would help her to strive for it. He could see optimism in her attitude and that was essential to achieve anything. Knowing that, it is also the solid basis for her to gain courage and true progress in life, he was extremely happy at the step his Di was taking. Her decision met Nani's smiling approval too, who told her that she would meet new people and make new friends. Mami added that it was a right move. This activity was a more viable option than staring at the four walls confined in her room. NK's offer, that he would accompany her to the class on the first day, made Akash raise an eyebrow in silent query. NK's assertion that, it would fetch her lot of friends as soon as they walk in, as all the girls will fall for him and surround her asking who this handsome Jasmine flower was had Akash bury his head in his hands thinking of the actual effectiveness of NK's presence and all the rest let out belly laughter.
Khushi twirling the fringe of her dupatta with her fingers, nervously called out, Arnavji. Arnav looked up from his laptop to see her standing by the door and perceiving from her gestures that she needed to ask him something asked her, what happened? Did she need something? His husky voice was an open invitation to her to come near him. Khushi stepping inside the room, told him hesitantly, she was thinking... and stopped short wondering how to proceed. His prompt, what? giving her the necessary courage, made her continue that Buaji had called her and it had been quite a long time since she visited them and she was thinking... She again paused wondering how he would react. Realizing what she wanted to tell him, he pondered over the matter and with a smile he responded that he needed to go to his office after lunch and she could accompany him. He would drop her at Buaji's house and he too would get a chance to meet them. Then she could spend her afternoon with them and later in the evening on his way back from the office he would pick her up. Khushi smiled and agreed.
As they drove towards Laxmi Nagar, he kept sneaking glances at his wife's happy face and her liveliness and felt extremely happy that even his small gesture could bring out so much of happiness for her. The glimpses of her smiling visage did not let him stress over the fact that he had to negotiate the vehicle amidst the sneaky autos and congested roads. As he stopped the vehicle before Buaji's house, Arnav caught hold of her hand making Khushi look at him. With his eyes trained on her face, taking in his fill of his beauty, he asked her softly, what she will do all afternoon. Khushi was only glad to let him know what all she had planned for a lovely time there. She listed out that her top priority was to talk to Amma, Babuji and Buaji to her heart's content, then go to Kamla Maasi's house, later play with her neighbouring kids, her battalion of friends, when they get home from school, eat golgappe with them... As she was rattling on the list that she planned to do, he asked her to, save one for him, in a husky voice that was easy and pleasing to the ear. It was so mellow, filled with warmth and love, that she felt as if a beam of sunshine had been melted into sound. It sent tingles along her spine making her look with wide eyes and nod while her soft cheeks bloomed like wild roses. He lifted her hand and pressed his lips to her fingers making her gasp out Arnavji! Her reaction was both happy as well as uneasy. She was happy to be the recipient of his attention, uneasy lest this gesture be witnessed by somebody on the street. Telling him that, they were in public and anybody could see them, she looked around frantically, for the street was swarmed with Buaji's friends and neighbours. Quickly she pulled her hand away. Arnav smiled and opened her door and accompanied her in to Buaji's house.
Buaji who opened the door was surprised to see her Arnav Bitwaa and was extremely happy that she caught hold of his arm and pulled him into the house lest he went away from the threshold itself. Bubbling with happiness, she called out to Garima asking her, to come out to see who has graced their home! Her son-in-law has come and asked her to welcome him with aarti as he steps into their house rarely, on Diwali or Janmashtami! Buaji teased him and tweaked his chin. Her special brand of welcome made Arnav smile for he understood her feelings from the aura of happiness she was emanating. When Khushi in reply tried to defend her husband saying, that it was not a fair statement that Arnavji had been busy, Buaji caught hold of her by her ear and gently admonished, was that so? Protecting her husband from them, was she? Khushi's squeak, Buaji..., as she squirmed trying to save her ear from Buaji's strong and firm hold was watched by Arnav with a smile. Garima, who came out wheeling Babuji's chair, made Arnav sit on a chair saying that it had been quite a long time since they saw him. Arnav agreed saying that he was caught up with work and greeted Babuji who nodded and smiled by way of greeting.
Garima's query on, how Naniji was keeping, elicited a smile from him saying, that she was fine. Arnav for whom his Nani held a special place, the very thought of her always brought in a soft smile on his face. And Buaji's query on Anjali Bitiyaa, brought out a smile of relief in him and said that she was much better and it was more than what was expected of her. He added that, she was attending painting classes at a college nearby. Buaji showed her happiness and approval with her exclamation and asked what would she do all day and night if she sat at home? She will just waste herself away by fretting over everything that happened. It was good that she was keeping herself busy, involving herself in activities of her liking and not succumbing to unwanted thoughts. Khushi served tea to all of them, and sat by her husband as he talked to her family. Arnav asked them a bit diffidently, whether it was just him feeling so or has Babuji really improved? He had felt that Babuji's hand moved with more control over his reflexes and his smile was much less lopsided. Amma and Buaji smiled at him and in answer Buaji told him that his observation was correct and he has improved. The doctors were happy with his steady progress. Arnav feeling happy at this smiled at Babuji and asked to give him a call, when they have to go to the hospital, so that he could send a car with the driver. Amma and Buaji nodded gratefully.
As Arnav's eyes went to the clock he noted the time making him jump up saying, that he needed to rush as he had an appointment scheduled in a few minutes and sought their permission to leave. Though feeling disappointed at him having to leave so quickly, Buaji on behalf of the rest agreed and she turned to her Sanka Devi and asked her to accompany her beloved to his car. Khushi turned beet red at Buaji's words and accompanied Arnav. Arnav looking at Khushi as he opened the car door told her that he will come over and pick her as soon as he finishes his work in the evening. Khushi was all smiles to hear his words. Her smile made him gaze longingly at her lips and as he lifted his eyes to hers that showed what he really wanted to do, Khushi's lovely cheeks turned into blushing clouds, making her shiver and give rise to goose pimples. With great effort and utter reluctance, Arnav got into the car and drove away, his eyes glued on her image in his rear view mirror till it vanished.
When Khushi called Arnav and asked whether he was busy, he told her that, for her, he always had time and what happened. As he talked to her, a small smile hovered on his lips, for just the lilt in her voice made his heart lurch and smile, as it would let his imagination run riot... with pleasant and happy thoughts. Khushi with hesitation told him softly that, she was thinking that she would stay over there for a couple of days. The minute her words ended came the epithet, what the! She quickly added that, she would be back on Thursday; fervently hoping that he would not let his anger rule over him. His outright denial, that he was in no way letting her do so, gave her the clue that she needed to tread carefully. It was in line with his behavior pattern. He held her to her words, that, she had said she would be going for half a day and she was supposed to return home with him that day itself... Arnav paused, realizing he sounded too agitated about something that should not be made a big deal about but it affecting him very much. Khushi tried to reason out with him saying that, she was just two km away from his house, not in another city. She would be staying with her family, not strangers. And all she was telling was that it was for two days. Khushi's reasonable approach and explanation was a wasted effort, for all he could hear in his near panic state was she being away. The waves of panic that hit him were huge just like the tidal waves caused during tsunami, engulfing him and giving rise to the familiar panic pattern of being deserted and the loneliness it accompanied. He felt deserted just like the time, when his mother whom he was very much attached to, took her life leaving him alone. Squashing the rising panic within him, he in a decisive ASR tone sounded out that it was not possible and he wanted her back in RM that day itself. Having stayed with him, with a bit of his attitude rubbed on her, his decree made her set for a clash with him. Mrs. ASR with her nose high up in the air, asserted herself and countered, what if she does not? His menacing growl, that he will make her pay and no one messes with ASR, elicited a quick response, is that so? Then let her be the one to break the news to him that no one messes with Mrs. ASR too, and in a fit of pique cut her call. Taken unawares, all Arnav could do was glare at the phone in his hand, all worked up, fuming with the ire of the man who has lots to say but no one to listen.
In the evening, when it was time for her Arnavji to leave his office, Khushi looked nervously at the phone. She was with mixed feelings. One minute she was a bundle of nerves thinking, what would he do, drag her back to RM? Should she call him? Appease him? The very next she would be annoyed and determined not to buckle down. She would think how dare he order her around? Was she HP? Or Amanji? She would dig in her heels thinking no, she was his wife. Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada. No one would be able to push her around, not even her Arnavji. She drew in a deep breath and prayed to Devi Maiyya for courage to fight, tooth and nail if necessary, to be able to make her stand clear even if she had to go the extra mile. While her mind was debating on it, she heard Buaji calling out to her and ask, whether she was sure that she wanted to stay over for two days? When Khushi affirmed, Buaji was a bit taken aback to know that she was leaving her Arnav Babua alone in RM. She posed a query, who would take care of him there if she was here, for was she not responsible for his well being? Hearing it, Khushi fumed. She who was at her tethers end told Buaji that her Arnav Babua was old enough to take care of himself. If she was not aware, here was a piece of information that, he had been taking care of himself for the past 28 years without any help from her. And he has a house full of family there. He could not be alone even if he tried. The elderly lady was perceptive enough to know that they must have had a lover's tiff and exclaimed, so it was because of the spat, she wanted to stay over for two days, was it not? Buaji's exclamation, with her eyes wide, rolling around like a wheels of a chariot, as though it was her eureka moment, had Garima chuckle behind her hand and Babuji smile. Khushi's unladylike, Hhmmmpppfff! that made her view clear as she left, amused her family. She was cheesed off seeing that her family managed to get a rise out of her, went to her room and locked the door in a huff.
A few minutes later, knocking at her door, Garima called out to Khushi to open the door. Swiping the tears with the back of her hand she opened the door to see her Amma there, holding a tray with two cups of tea and a bowl of snacks in her hands. The sight before her made her frown and ask why she had to bring the tea there. She would have come out... her voice tapered out as she saw the person behind her Amma, making her gasp in a query, Arnavji? Arnav made his way into her room, wheeling a bag behind him. Khushi was so stunned to see him that she was left open-mouthed in disbelief! She wondered, what was going-on? Garima placed the tea tray on the table and turned to Arnav. She cupped his lean cheek in one palm and asked him to rest for a while and she would call when it was time for dinner. She asked Khussi to take care of Arnav Bitwaa and help him unpack and make space for his things in her cupboard and cabinets among all her hoarded junk. This strict admonition to Khushi to make her Damadji as comfortable as possible left Khushi staring in silence as her Amma left, closing the door after her. As Arnav locked the door and turned to look at a stupefied Khushi, he saw the telltale signs of tears that had been shed. He cupped her cheek and running a gentle finger down the curve, he asked, was she crying? What was the reason? Was it because he lost his temper? First, she nodded affirming and then, shook her head to mean a no, making Arnav smile at what he thought was her indecision and ask what exactly she means? Yes or no? She replied, both and she had cried, not because he was angry with her. When he shouts at her she does not feel like crying but gets the urge to respond with shouting back at him and she does. So that was fine by her. Her reply made him smile and think, that his employees should hear her. For they were sure to die of shock to hear her dismissing his anger as of no consequence when he had the ability to make grown men quiver in their boots and a mere look from him was enough to make them cry. He asked her in a tender loving voice, if not for his anger, then why was it she had shed tears? Her confession, with her eyes not meeting his, that it was what Buaji had said, she should have not left him alone in RM, made him feel a lump in his throat. She continued to say in a small voice that she had told Buaji that he would not be alone there, but... and paused. When Arnav prompted her to continue, Khushi looked away, for once lost for words.
Recognizing what her silence meant, it as a reaction with the knowledge that he would be lonely and had realized it after Buaji's talk, he confirmed her thoughts by whispered confession that, he was always lonely without her. Even in the middle of a crowd he would feel that loneliness if she was not by his side, making Khushi stare at him with her eyes like saucers. As he whispered his fingers deftly dealt with the buttons of his coat and the waistcoat and he continued saying, that was a fact known to all. When he reached home from office and told them that she was going to stay for two days, Nani scolded him for leaving her alone. Khushi was stunned to hear it. And with a smile he added that, Mami had told him that he should have stayed back with her and let his in-laws take care of him. He threw away the coat, waistcoat and tie, and slid two buttons of his shirt out of their buttonholes. Khushi who was taken aback hearing what he had to say, asked him in confirmation whether Naniji and Mamiji asked him to come there? As he said yes, and with a smile explained, they can understand her need to spend some time with her family, and also they know how miserable he would be without her, a half smile, like the moonlight of laughter, dawned on her face. Arnav cut a joke that, HP was one happy person and was in such a hurry to pack him off that he ran to keep Arnav's bag in the car. HP had not wanted him shouting or breaking things that he would resort to do if he were alone in RM. It brought out full bloom smiles on her rosy lips with soft laughter as just like the ripples on the sea. Khushi rushing to her husband threw her arms around him and whispered against his neck that, she was so glad that he had come, burrowing closer to him she confessed that, as soon as she had finished fighting with him, she had started to miss him. His, good, against her cheek as his lips moved towards hers and his arms gathering her as close as they could, made her query, what did his good mean? As she gazed at his eyes seeking answer, he said, very good, in appreciation of her angling her face just the way he wanted as he captured her startled lips with his eager ones. His motto, don't talk just act, don't say just show; don't promise just prove, for action speak louder than words were very effective in stopping her from asking anymore questions. Not that Khushi had anymore to ask for she felt words were vastly overrated and any day action was better, much better and her Arnavji knew only the best.
That is why it is titled ACTION.
"Desires dictate our priorities, priorities shape our choices, and choices determine our actions"
~ Dallin H. Oaks
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Part 16.
This update is about private conversation between two persons, tete-a-tete.
After the laughter-filled dinner that was part of the simple and laid-back life of the Guptas', Khushi dragged the charpoy to the open yard and sat with her Arnavji watching the stars. It was a pleasant night and as Arnav looked around he found the streets deserted. The dim glow of the streetlights was falling on the hand pump and his car, parked in Happyji's garage. Arnav, reminiscing the time Khushi made him bathe outside in full view of the public, in a voice that was filled with mirth he asked her, whether she remembers the bath she gave him? Not comprehending what he meant or that it was light teasing banter, with her eyes wide open she parroted, bath? Wondering when she had given him one. As Arnav laughed and told her at the hand pump, in full vision of the ladies present there to collect water, Khushi's cheeks were suffused with colours, with the memories of her actions when she had pulled a fast one on him. Arnav caught hold of her hand and entwined his fingers with hers. This conversation reminded her how she had tried her utmost to break his will power in her home turf as a way of getting back at him. Khushi whispered that she was sorry for putting him through that drill and asked, he had taken offence, had he not? She had been so angry at him that... Khushi was not allowed to complete her sentence by Arnav admitting, that it was fine, for he deserved that and much more for all that he had put her through and what she did amounted to nothing in comparison. They sat inhaling the cool night air in a companionable silence, each savoring the presence of the other with their hands held in a warm clasp and enjoying the joys of huddling together. The stars were sparkling bright over them as they felt happiness and contentment wash over them.
Arnav took care of the pesky mosquitoes, swatting them with the racket, an attack that caused absolute carnage, bringing expertly their untimely demise. Khushi came in and shut the door; she asked him whether they could go to bed. Arnav told her that he would switch on the AC that would not only cool the room but also keep mosquitoes at bay and went on to do so. Khushi getting the bed readied, pumped the pillows soft. She took a sheet and folded it lengthwise into a long narrow strip and placed it at the centre as a divider, marking the space, his and hers. Arnav looked at the bed with shocked eyes and asked her what was that! Khushi's cheeky riposte, that it was the Raizada Rekha aka Arnav Rekha, had Arnav exclaim, Khushi, in exasperation. Khushi trying to look disarmingly innocent, beguilingly explained to Arnav that her Pati Parmeshwar is always scared with the thought that she might pounce on him in her sleep and subject him to her insolent and ill-mannered behavior. So to save himself from such ignominy, he places this rekha to warn her not to cross over... Her saucy teasing remark was not allowed to be completed by Arnav. He grabbed the sheet and flung it aside. In a quick move, sweeping her off her feet, unmindful of her natter, he had her ensconced in his arms and carried her to bed. He held her delicately as though she was fragile and extremely precious. Lowering her gently on the bed, he slid in besides her resting on his one arm he leaned over her, to study her lovely face in great detail. As he whispered that he has a lovely wife who despite all the precautions that he takes, makes it a point to crawl over him at night, Khushi pouted in defiance. Though his words were chin music, teasing her with objections, that she sleeps in taekwondo poses all night, wrestles with the covers, winds her legs around him, climbs all over him, and grips him by his collar, his eyes were telling a different story altogether. They were engaged in backchat sending scorching heat in to hers like pulsars, making her cheeks glow red as tomatoes. He continued to say that, she fears he would fly away, out through the window if she lets go of him. As he smirked, his eyes were glued on her pouting lips. An irate Khushi not liking to be at the receiving end all the time, growled who was it who said that he hated to share a room with her? Arnav, pretending to be unaware asked her, who was it who said so? That one must have been a fool. Khushi making her opinion on the matter clear, endorsed, that the person was indeed a fool, an arrogant fool, full of anger, full of hatred. Arnav peppering his words with lots of sweet kisses on her lips said, that the fool was also full of love, more love than he knew what to do with. He was filled with, love that just would not die whatever happened, love that could not be forgotten, killed, or ignored. That very love had made, spending each night with her in the same room, a refined self inflicted torture.
His loving ministrations to her lips, along with the soft and husky voice were making wondrous things inside her, shooting frissons of thrills and making her moan. With a tint of wicked glint dancing in his laughing eyes he asked, what happened, Khushi? Khushi trying not to break her composure, and act dignified told him, nothing. He repeated nothing? Then, it was fine and it was time to turn in. Wishing her good night, he turned away pretending to go to sleep. Khushi stared at him, her mouth wide open with shocking disbelief. She lay waiting for him to turn around, hoping he would gather her in his arms and make her forget everything but him and his love all through the night. She could hear the ticking of seconds. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six... Seeing no movement from him, she could not withstand the distance, she called softly, Arnavji! She attempted to parley but he was dumb to it. There was no response for he lay still. The only indication of his devilry was the triumphant smile, that he could not resist showing out, hearing the pleading note in her voice. It served only to fuel her anger that was all ready to be kindled with just a soft strike. She was miffed by his attitude as she relished these pillow talks when she had his undivided time and attention in the confines of their room, their very own Eden. She reveled in the rapport and intimacy, being close emotionally and physically as it helped both to have their ego stroked by the other who loves you and wants to be with you. With an ungainly, Hhmmmpppfff! Khushi fumed and turned away to face the door.
Her heart beat went tick tock, tick tock in tandem with the clock as she counted one, two, three, four... Slowly his hand came to rest on her shoulder and as Khushi tried to shrug it off, he held her firm. His fingers trailed down her arm intimately leaving a trail of shivers and tremors, heating the skin it touched. Khushi was filled with helpless pleasure as his fingers moved up her arm, her shoulder, and to her nape that made her feel floating on the soft clouds. His dexterous fingers expertly undid the hook and pulled the zip of her kameez down to her waist. Heat seared up her body as his hot gaze drifted across her. Silently, his gentle fingers eased the kameez off her shoulders, making her shut her eyes tight. He caught hold of her shoulder and gently made her to flip on to her back. He looked down in to her hazel dazed eyes that had golden speckles reflecting his needy, passionate, hot eyes. He whispered his view that, he does not need her words, for her eyes tell him everything she feels, and went on to demonstrate the usefulness of her silent lips, kissing her into oblivion. It was a statement that said, the mouth was made for communication and nothing was more articulate than a kiss.
That is why it is titled, tete-a-tete.
"The best things in life can never be kept; they must be given away. A smile, a Kiss and Love"
~ Tony Farrar
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Section 1 of Part 17.
This update is about defense or protection, BULWARK.
On the Diwali day Arnav and Khushi, both were very busy, with Arnav trying to wind up his work as quickly as possible to return home to join the festivities, his and Khushi's first Diwali together, and Khushi running after the caterers and the decorators to get the house all decked up to look gorgeous, with festoons of flowers, greens and fairy lights. The house needed to be all spruced up by the time the guests arrived. The diyas she had made had dried just fine and were hand-painted in glowing colors each colorful than the other that would bring in a colourful, lyrical, dramatic quality into a vast, unquenchable litany of lights when lit. They were stacked in trays, waiting to be lit. She ran from one part of the house to the next, making sure that everything was done and ready by evening. At RM she was the mainstay, moving quickly like the mercury looking into various things that needed to be done.
When it was the time for the festivities to begin, at dusk, Arnav and Akash entered in to the house, and saw Nani, Payal, Di and Mami in the hall, all immersed in giving the last minute touch to the already decorated room and Devi Maiyya's idol for the evening pooja and festivities. Arnav saw all the ladies of his family there sans Khushi. Leaving Akash to join the family, Arnav walked away in search of his wife. He found her in a corner, sitting all alone by a huge rangoli design. She looked extraordinarily beautiful to his eyes, in an ordinary purple suit with her hair plaited as not to hinder her in her work. Her face was a picture of focus and concentration as she sieved the colours evenly filling it into the design. As he watched, she finished her work and heaving a sigh of relief stretched her back. His face was filled with happiness to see her beautiful art of rangoli. Arnav eagerly smiling took an eager step towards her, but the smile died away and his feet halted at the look on her face in an unguarded moment. She looked lost, scared as she looked around the dimly-lit hall, for she was haunted by the images of last Diwali. In her mind's eye, she clearly saw the guests milling around, she in her red sari that was actually meant for Lavanyaji, the sugar-free sweets she had lovingly made for Arnavji, the very sweet with which she had fed him while congratulating him on his decision to get engaged to Lavanyaji, the abyss of pain she had sunk into as he had held Lavanyaji close to him and looked at her with a triumphant gleam in his eyes as she stood by the pool, her visage a picture of devastation, feeling like the lone survivor after the devastating typhoon, left alone again, adrift in a strange no-man zone, rudderless, abandoned, pain feeding on her mercilessly as she had submitted to a ruthless fate and a puppet in the hands of a cruel man who had played with her feelings and humiliated and all torn up inside. For her RM was like a fortress, that held both bitter as well as sweet memories, the memories that protected as well as had slayed her through.
Seeing the haunted and persecuted expression on Khushi, Arnav swallowed hard, cursing himself and his thoughtless behaviour at the time of the previous Diwali, which was purely despicable. He had behaved abominably selfish and then had stood tall making her congratulate him, lording over her hurt with a challenge thrown silently with his eyes. He had been under the misconception that he was safeguarding his heart and his deed on that day was a justifiable part of defense. He had hurt Khushi first and then Lavanya for no fault of theirs. His cowardice, his prejudice, and his blindness had set all three of them on the path to destruction. If only he had enough sense then to give in to his love for Khushi, acknowledged his love for her at least to himself, he could have spared all three of them much anguish rather than going through the whole rigmarole. But, he knew he cannot unring a bell.
Khushi heaved a sigh, feeling herself tremble after her short visit to the ghastly incidents and the harrowing past. She had pushed the memories under the carpet for months, suppressing them each time they came to the fore. But a year back on this day, the day when it was the festival of lights, that was meant as a celebration of the going from the tunnel of darkness to towards the light; she had plunged into darkness, for she could not find a source of light that could lead her out of the nebulous darkness that enveloped her. Amidst the circles of light all she could see was the shadow being cast that was sucking her into it. These bitter memories were proving very hard to control, were very adamant in raising their heads to destroy her peace. For her it was like standing on the parapet. One side it was the bitter memories of the past that were trying her to pull down into the precipice and on the other side, Arnavji's face and his care of the present pulling her towards his ocean of love. She knew where she wanted to be, in the present and not the past. Khushi shut her eye, as though she could shut them out with her eyes closed and willed herself to come out of those melancholic thoughts. Arnav stood watching her with his heart in his mouth. She pepped herself that it was over. Clenching her coloured fingers into a tight fist, as an outwork against the onslaught of these memories, she repeated to herself that it was over, it was a bad phase that will not visit her, it was finished. When she accepted Arnavji as her husband she had accepted his past too. She could not hold it against him. She could not judge him by his past record for he too was in the present just like her. She reminded herself that Arnavji had changed; he now loved her very much and was her husband. Lavanyaji was settled in London now and with Devi Maiyya's blessings hopefully she was leading a happy life. Last Diwali was in the past, a nightmare that had to be forgotten if she had to go on. She wondered why let the sadness of the past ruin the happiness of the present, why rake over the ashes when they now had a new life together, new experiences to share, many joys waiting in the wings. Khushi looked around. Everything was ready, for the pooja and the guests invited to the evening's function. Now all she had to do was shower and dress. Arnavji would return from office soon, and as a precaution against him coming to know of the feelings she was undergoing, she had to present a cheerful face to him, somehow, even if it meant that she had to dig on her reserves. She needed to get through this night, somehow.
Arnav watched her as she stood up, gathered the paraphernalia needed for making the rangoli design, and walked to the kitchen to hand them over to HP to stash away till the next Diwali or discard as he saw fit. Taking a diya she began lighting them all over the hall. As she was immersed in her work, she heard a beaming Nani, extremely happy with her handiwork, calling out to her to come over and check on the decorations she had done on the Devi Maiyya's idol. Arnav watched her give a wooden smile as she walked up to Nani, inspected the idol in great detail and hug Nani, praising her for her efforts. Nani seeing Khushi wan asked her, whether she was alright? She thought Khushi looked a bit pale. Khushi threw her off the track saying that, it was due to her feeling tired after all the running around throughout the day. The incorrigible Mami, who was particular about how they look, told her that they could not have a Raizada bahu looking wan and tired. She advised her in a loud whisper to take a nap before pooja just like her Mami does to look as fresh as a daisy when the guests arrive. For Khushi her family was the protection that would help her to withstand the assault of those bitter memories. Khushi giving her a smile nodded at her pearl of wisdom and turned to walk up the steps, not seeing Arnav standing in the shadows of the dimly-lit corner.
When Khushi came out of the bathroom after her shower, she saw her Arnavji lying on their bed, his arms crossed beneath his head, looking pensively at the ceiling as though he was mulling over some things that were distasteful. Khushi seeing him was utterly surprised and trilled, when did he come home? She had not even been aware of it! She had hoped for some moments of respite, to dwell on her thoughts all alone and set her mind into a good frame, erect her shield, to enable her to pass through the day filled with bitter unwanted memories. She did not want to treat herself as a victim of the past but as a confident survivor. She wanted to be able to tackle anything that was thrown at her but she needed those few moments to recover from the mental assault and school her face. But luck was not on her side. As she asked, Arnav turned his eyes to rest on her animated face and asked her softly, what was she wearing that night? She told him that Di had given her a sari last week and she was planning to wear it. As she told her voice faded away. His continued silence prompted her to add that, it was a beautiful piece embellished with lots of crystals and bead work. As Arnav looked at her silently, she skittered her gaze away from him, took out the packet and showed it to him. It was a beautiful sari, with elaborate work done along its borders and body, a vivid midnight blue, a colour from the other end of the spectrum, from her red of the previous Diwali. She was buttressing herself from the unwanted thoughts.
Not wanting him to comment on the sari or suggest that she exchange it for a red one, Khushi changing the topic asked him, whether he had his tea. Getting a negative in reply, she smiled and rushed out saying, that she will get it for him and in the meantime why not he change, as there was just an hour before the guests arrive. She hurried to be away from his all-seeing eyes, making the preparation of his tea as her shield. As she entered the bedroom with his tea, she found it to be empty. Khushi stood looking around and confirmed that he was not there. Looking at the tea and the nibbles she had brought for him she wondered, where he was. As her thoughtful gaze wandered around the room, it met with a sari laid on bed, her blanched face told a story of its own. She had decided on the blue sari as her redoubt, her stronghold, fortifying herself with it. She wondered how did the red sari turn up, when she had left the midnight blue one over there.
Placing the tray on the low table, Khushi walked to the bed on shaky legs and plonked down touching the folds of the sari with quivering fingers. The colour red, that too bright red just like the blood flowing through her veins, red like the blood her heart had wept last Diwali. As she was feeling the texture of the sari immersed in her unpalatable thoughts, the dusk had set in. As it was twilight the fairy lights were switched on that lit the entire house with its dainty lights making the mansion look like a bit of the Milky Way filled with red, yellow and blue stars. The pool side was lit up with the twinkling fairy lights, sparkling and shining, glistening on the leaves and flowers, lending a veneer of festivity. The red sari held in her fingers took on an intense hue and grandeur that was fascinating to her like a snake to a mesmerized mouse it had cornered and was going to swallow whole. While she was immersed in the sari, she heard a soft call, Khushi, from behind and as she turned, she saw Arnavji standing near the door to the poolside. His voice had gone gravelly and huskier than usual as he asked her, did she like the sari. His poser filled Khushi with terrible dilemma. She could not find words to express her anguish at his choice or have the heart to disappoint him with the truth of how she felt. Taking her usual route of suppressing her emotions and feelings, not wanting to disappoint him, seeking the strength and support from her belief, faith and trust in her love, she just nodded, lowering her lashes to hood her eyes.
In a low tone, as though he were making a promise, as though he were whispering of his love for her in her ears, he told her, that he loves her in red. Khushi, murmuring her assent to wear it, rushed into the bathroom to change. As she entered the room wearing the sari, there were two jewel boxes on the bed. She opened them to find a diamond and ruby necklace, a pair of earrings, and bangles that made brilliant accessories to the sari. The sari was in brilliant red with crystal bead work done like spiral chandeliers twinkling and glittering when the light fell on them, looking just like a strip of group of stars being placed on her sari. The choli at the back was like a crystal chandelier, the bright red making her fair skin glow. The accessories were just perfect. She looked around for Arnavji, but it looked as though he had gone down. She wore them, and went to join the family.
The house looked beautiful, as it had done on Diwali a year back. Lights and diya, colourful floral festoons emanating their fragrance and the grand dressing of all the Raizada ladies showing them as belonging to the opulent elite added to the charm and grandeur of the evening. The family members dressed to the nines were welcoming the guests. The Guptas' alone were not present, for it was the time scheduled for Babuji's treatment. Garima and Buaji had taken Babuji to the Ayurveda hospital for a week's treatment. As Khushi looked around her eyes seeking her husband, her guardian, she saw Arnavji standing with Akash Jiju and Nanheji at the entrance, greeting their colleagues. Feeling Khushi's presence and her eyes riveted on him, he looked around and seeing the vision in red, his breath hitched. She looked beautiful, just like a fairy in red, like a dream, like a blessing, the folds of her sari clinging lovingly to the full lines of her figure, his mother's necklace, earrings, and bangles adorning her enchanting figure. Her silky hair was left unbound just as he preferred it. Her smile added to her allure. She was smiling at Payal. Only the fear and uncertainty in her eyes betrayed her uneasiness. Sensing her emotional upheaval wanting to be her protector, calling out, Khushi..., he held out his hand. Khushi with a grateful smile on her slightly pale face walked up to him and placed her hand in his. He could feel her fingers trembling. He held on to them, tight knowing he had to lay many a ghost tonight.
As guests began to stream in large numbers, Arnav made it a point to introduce Khushi as his wife to everyone, putting his arm around her shoulders or holding her arm as and when he could. Some of the ladies gave her a quick once-over, and went away smirking. After a while, three ladies came up to Khushi, Mrs. Dubey, Mrs. Mishra and Mrs. Rastogi. Mrs. Dubey, raising her one eyebrow in an exaggerated arch queried, was she not the Raizada bahu, Khushi. When Khushi replied that, she was, with a smile, Mrs. Mishra asked her, can she get them something long and cool to drink as it was a very hot evening. The rotund lady fanned herself with her plump fingers, her painted nails flashing with its brilliant gaudy colour and her face faking a smile. Khushi moving to the tables set against the wall brought three long glasses of chilled orange juice on a silver tray, to serve the guests. With thanks, murmured, Mrs. Rastogi took a deep sip while eyeing Khushi speculatively she mused, that she had seen her somewhere before, looked quite familiar, just unable to place exactly where... Her big, cold eyes raked Khushi up and down as though she was looking at a horse in an auction before bidding for it. Mrs. Dubey spoke out feeding her the needed information that, she may have seen Khushi, for she used to be a maid there before she trapped the scion of the Raizadas'. Her malicious smile was twisting on her lips and the rest had an ugly sneer on their faces, at the remark while Khushi paled hearing it. Mrs. Mishra added her two bit saying that, last Diwali, Arnav Singh Raizada was all set to marry a girl from London, his girlfriend. He had announced their decision to marry at the party. But wonders never cease, for this Diwali, the London girl was nowhere in the picture, and in her place was this low-class waif who has made it good. The lady smiled, flashing her bleached teeth. Mrs. Dubey, addressing Khushi added that, she must let them in to the secret behind her success. After all, it would not have been easy to move up the ladder from being a street waif to being maid then to the position of mistress of the house, all within a span of a year. It would have involved intense machinations and they would love to acquire this valuable know-how. She smiled, her eyes glinting in pleasure at the pain on Khushi's face, for she thought the three had been successful in storming the citadel and churning things with their venomous sharp tongues.
But it was not to shine for long. Her smile froze hearing, an outraged, shut up, a hiss from clenched jaws of the Lion, the defender of his Pride and his territory. They were told that they were his Nani's guests, but that did not empower them to insult or hurt his wife. If they were incapable of being civil or having a civil thought in their head, then the only thing left for them to do was let themselves out through the open front door. The doors were wide open awaiting their exit. Seeing Arnav's face tightened with anger, annoyance and determination, Mami, Di, and Nani, Khushi's guardian angels' joined them. Khushi stood in their midst, feeling like a sacrificial lamb with her limbs quivering. Nani asked her grandson, what happened Chotey. But it was Mrs. Dubey who jumped in to answer saying, nothing much. It was just that her grandson was asking them to leave. As Nani, Mami and Di stared at Arnav, he explained to them that, the three were badmouthing Khushi... He stated that, no one insults his wife and gets away with it. His eyes were spitting fire, balls of fury. Mrs. Mishra offended by his usage of word asked, badmouthing? How can speaking the truth be called badmouthing? Mrs. Rastogi told that, they were just asking her new bahu how she changed her status from maid to malkin here. That's all and of course, how she usurped the place of Arnav's girlfriend from London after he announced his plans to marry her last Diwali at a similar party. How can that be termed as badmouthing Khushi? Mami who was listening to this fumed and told them without mincing words, that they do not have to worry about their Arnav Bitwaa's girlfriend or his wife. They were there to do it, and signed off her statement with a, Hello Hi Bye Bye! Nani with her eyes gone cold as icicles, and voice, firm and cutting as a sword, told them that, her Chotey was right to chide them. She asked them to kindly leave the house if they cannot be polite to her bahu. Anjali unequivocally told them that Khushiji is their Chotey's wife, and they were proud of her. They, the outsiders, need not have to concern themselves with her antecedents or their Chotey's past. Anjali's eyes were like rotary cannon launching an attack and shelling fire at the three ladies along with her words. Mami and Nani nodded their support. Nani declared that it was way too high for them to ever understand how she won Chotey's heart, because they were incapable of seeing goodness and kindness in others. Not one to be out beaten, Mami, with an evil look on her face asked them, what if she started to ask after their sons and daughters, and their deeds, for there were no barriers to stop her from carrying out her words. If ever that comes out, they will not be having a place to hide their face. So she asked them to leave the house, addressing them as, you walking-talking vendors of gossip. Arnav, Nani, Anjali and Mami stood as a solid bulwark against the malicious attack on Khushi. The three ladies, unable to withstand the assault, with humiliated ego, walked off in a huff. Nani called out to Khussi bitiyaa and asked her to ignore such nonsense. It was nothing but just their jealousy talking. She told Khushi that it was time for the pooja and led her away. Arnav followed hoping to get a moment alone with his wife, but it was just a wishful thinking on his part that was doomed for disappointment.
In this update Khushi herself erects certain shields to protect herself from the bitter thoughts and also protect Arnav from getting an inkling of her thoughts. Against the outsiders, Arnav, Nani, Anjali and Mami come to Khushi's defense and successfully do so. That is what family is all about, to be there when you need them the most. That is why it is titled BULWARK.
"This is part of what a family is about, not just love. It's knowing that your family will be there watching out for you. Nothing else will give you that. Not money. Not fame. Not work"
~ Mitch Albom, Tuesdays With Morrie
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Section 2 of Part 17.
This update is about acceptance of something as true, in a word, CREDENCE.
As Arnav sat beside Khushi for the pooja, he looked sideways at her. Her eyes were on the havan, her hands folded in prayer piously. Though her body was by him, her mind and her thoughts were far away, wedged in some unpleasant place in the past. Arnav swallowed the bitter spit of pain. It was something he needed to accept as the bitter fruit of his actions that his wife would have to undergo all through their life and he would have to undergo looking at her pain. There was no escape from it. For he had realized that there was no way to stop the wave, but they needed only to learn how to surf it out. This understanding was his first step to acceptance and only then would there be any scope for recovery. As he watched, her lashes hooded over her eyes, hiding her pain filled eyes from the world in general, him in particular and she sat erect praying. After the pooja, Khushi, being the eldest bahu, was given the plate of prasad to distribute it among the guests. She offered a laddoo each to Nani, Mami, Akash Jiju, Jiji, Di... Then when she came to Arnavji, taking a laddoo she held it out to him. She expected him to hold out his hand for it, but he parted his lips instead. Khushi gulped, and slowly placed the tidbit in his mouth, feeling a hundred eyes watching them. Arnav leaned forward and kissed her on her cheek in gratitude, for gracing in his life despite his cruel ways, making Khushi gape at him and the crowd gathered, stare at them. Mami, who had placed the laddoo in her mouth choked as it went down the wrong passage, it took the concerted efforts of her son and daughter-in-law to bring her back to normal. This gesture of Arnav's gave credence to what the family was stating that Khushi was their Chotey's wife and she was not a street waif who had trapped Arnav. She was in fact the sole custodian of his heart. Arnav, who earlier was against display of any emotions related to love was now openly showing his affections towards his wife, that effectively shut any yentas still lingering in the guest crowd.
When Anjali in a sweet voice requested her whether she could check on the diyas and refill them with the oil if needed, Khushi smiled politely and went on to comply. Her eyes combed finely through the lamps lit in the hall, stairs and then went to the poolside. There a diya was giving out its flickering light just before it got doused. Khushi quickly bent down and poured oil in to its cup, watching the flame revive. She stood up, capped the oil bottle, and turned around, to see Arnavji standing by her. Her shocked whisper, Arnavji, seeing his contrite face, elicited an apology in a soft voice. As he said he was sorry, she looked at him silently. Having decided to speak his mind, in a sincere voice that had gone huskier and deeper with emotion came out his heartfelt apology. He slowly and succinctly reflected his honest thoughts that, he was sorry for subjecting her to such insults. He was sorry for hurting her, this as well as last Diwali. He was sorry for not being brave enough to face his love for her in the previous year and for putting her under the grill. He had not played fair and was sorry for messing up her life and also playing with Lavanya's feelings the previous year. And to set the records straight, his thoughts had been one big incomprehensible mess and really did not know what he was thinking. His mind had been hopelessly muddled, not really understanding himself, he had run away from his feelings as the concept of love was alien to his mind, something he had looked down upon and had never thought or dreamt that he too would fall in love. While being in the cusp of love unknowingly, he was in such a hurry to run away from his feelings for her that he ended up committing one mistake after the other and finally all it had amounted to was, heartache for both and humiliation to her. His acknowledgement to his erroneous thinking and admission of being a drowning swimmer flailing hands to keep afloat and really not aware that by doing so he was getting sucked into the whirlpool stronger did gain credence to his actions.
Hearing his words, Khushi looked away. Though she could empathize with him, his words did not assuage her wounded heart. Still she listened silently. Arnav pressing on with his unreserved abject apology with the belief, however bitter the truth was it would not vanish and it needed to be dealt told that, his list of errors and blunders were long. He had insulted her, hurt her physically, lacerated her with his tongue, but Diwali night was the worst. That was the zenith. It marked the apogee of his worst behavior, for it was worse than the night he had coerced her into marriage, because when they got married, at least he was with her. They were together in the misery. On Diwali night, he..., he paused unable to continue. But Khushi did not react. Her head remained firmly turned away. Arnav cupped her face and made her look at him and said that it was no consolation, but he had to let her know that when he hurt her, his heart was torn to strips. Every tear she had shed had corroded his heart like acid. After his emotionless cruel deed, he had been unable to sleep at nights, seeing her look at him with wounded eyes through the glass window, for they were etched in his memory. Her look of betrayal and the hurt had kept on piercing him and had put him on pins and needles. He had thought that it was easier to pretend that he did not care than admit that it was killing him and had carried on. Khushi lowered her eyes hearing it, knowing fully well she needed to hide the raw pain that evoked in her, with the revisit to the wound of the past. She knew if he saw it in full bloom in her eyes he was doomed, would never be able to get out of his remorse all their life. She realized though the bad memories had a habit to rerun, it was something she had to trust herself not to succumb to, for the sake of her love and her life, her Arnavji.
Arnav continued to say that the full realization of the pickle he had gotten in to, came to him when people started congratulating him for an engagement he had never wanted to or planned to get in to, when Lavanya was hugging him, while the one he wanted, she was turning to leave him and go out of his life. Khushi lowered her lashes to shut him out. With a sigh, he asked her to look at him, adding a beseeching, Khushi please. Compelled by his tone, Khushi obliged and lifted her lashes. He told her that he would never forget the last look she gave him, the look that said, now that you have gotten what you wanted, are you not happy now? Her silent query found its target and the answer he received from within him that very moment, made him stagger. He had realized that to escape from the heat of the pan he had plunged himself into the fire. He knew that he had made a mistake of mammoth proportions, driven by his panic. But it was too late to backtrack. His deed of panic had resounding repercussions. He had pushed her, his Khushi, away from him and whatever he did would bring misery to one or the other. They stood silent among the burning diyas. The sound of fireworks filled the air. His confession and apology only made her strong and made her to resolve, not to live in the past for she had already lived there, and be it with pain or with happiness. She knew just because past taps on the shoulder, it did not mean one has to look back. She needed to let go of the burdens of the past as one cannot change it. But she could go confidently in the direction of the future for that was where their dreams now lay, without forgetting what the past taught her. This acceptance of faith and trust in her love, in her Arnavji, in their life together helped her to gather her thoughts and brace herself to look at their future together.
With this firm resolve she asked him, not to give her anymore red saris admitting that she hates the very sight of them. They remind her of nothing but humiliation and the loss she felt. Arnav promised her that he won't, with a lump in his throat. She told him that the one she wore last Diwali was now a heap of ashes and she would burn this one too. Her threat to mingle it with cinders brought out an agreeable response, accepting her decision; he invited her to not only to burn this piece but also any red saris that Di, Mami and Payal possessed too. Any piece of red cloth she could lay her hands on too could go to the bonfire. If she prefers, she could put a burning stake to reduce the whole house into a bag of ashes. He gave her carte blanche to do as she pleases and he would support her to the hilt if it gave her any solace. His words uttered with confidence, asked her to repose her faith in him declaring that he was with her come what may. His words brought in a ghost of a smile on her lips. She was adamant when she said that she will not make any more diya for Diwali. It was a challenge for him to refute her defiance. When in a low voice rife with disappointment, he asked, won't she come stealthily to remove anymore clay soil from his garden; he received an answer with certainty ringing in it, that she would not. Arnav sighed in response and agreed. Her denial to light the diya around the pool though disappointed Arnav, one look at her militant eye made him give in to her demand. She continued with her list of what she wanted to do henceforth. She told him that, every Diwali, she will go to Buaji's house. He can be at RM listening to witches bitching about her, while she will be bursting crackers and eating jalebi with her children army. Arnav was not ready for this for it ran counter to his thoughts and made no bones about it. He told her that he wanted an amendment to this decision of hers, as he too wanted to celebrate Diwali with her; He requested to take him with her. Khushi who was glad to hear his words that gave her the much needed assurance, pretending to ponder on the issue said, that she would give it due consideration and let him know at a later date.
Arnav calling her out fished out a small jewel box from his pocket and handed it to her saying, that it was her Diwali gift from him. A delighted Khushi opened it wondering what it held. The box housed a beautiful diamond necklace that lay on its velvet bed. The stones were with perfect balance of cut, colour and clarity, sparkling fire in the dim light. The stray ray of light falling on it was making it twinkle as though beckoning her with a wink to slip it on to her neck. This was Arnav's way of giving credit to Khushi. It was his acceptance that he was like a rough diamond before her advent into his life and now he is able to sparkle with love with her polishing his soul with her brand of unconditional love. Taking a good look at the diamond set, Khushi had realized that the goal is to walk a path on which our souls will shine and sparkle as brightly as diamonds. On this path there will be many labyrinth turns just like the angles and facets of the diamond. But if we travel the path with honorable hearts, and if we are aware of the reflective nature of our lives, with our actions reflecting in our reality, we will accomplish our mission of reaching the light. Khushi touched by his gesture, whispering, thanks, kissed him on his lean cheek, caressing his stubble with her soft lips. Arnav, to his credit knowing what really gladdened her heart, whispered that, he knows that she prefers jalebis to diamonds and there was a box of them waiting for her on their bed, a special package from her favorite, Chagganlal Mittaiwala. Khushi's joy knew no bounds and she almost jumped up and down in joy shouting out, Arnavji! Thank you, thank you! Arnav's looked at her smiling luscious lips and asked where was his gift? as he lowered his head to steal a kiss. But Khushi took a step back. Asking him to wait for a minute, she vanished in to their bedroom and returned with a white cover which she handed over to him saying, that it was her gift.
Arnav's forehead scrunched up as he flipped it open and drew out a single sheet of paper, wondering what it held. The inscription on the top of the sheet announced that it as a lab report. Arnav gasped, Khushi! admonishing her for not telling him that she had not been feeling well! Why had she not told him about it? Seeing his panic, Khushi pouted and asked him, to read fully before pouncing on her. Her voice that carried conviction, made Arnav's eyes scan through the report that read, Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada had been tested for pregnancy, and the result was... POSITIVE +. Arnav stared at the paper and then at Khushi's face. It compelled him to reread the report carefully wondering if he had misread it. His unbelievably slow reading and comprehension of what was written had an impatient Khushi on tenterhooks. Unable to withstand his snail's pace, on a teasing note she blurted, that he was so slow! If it were Salman Khanji in his place, he would have lifted his wife in his arms and twirled her around! But Arnav was beyond all teasing, he was not going to rise to the bait. He was stumped to know that their family was all set to grow. From two, they were to become three and as confirmation, he asked whether they were really going to have a baby? Her laughing banter that, she thinks it to be a baby and for all she knew, it could be a jalebi too, did not elicit a fitting repartee. He stared at the report once more before folding it carefully and putting it in his pocket. He then knelt at her feet, and touched her tummy reverentially. He called out to Khushi softly and uttered, our baby, in a soft whisper, as if scared of disturbing the kid. Khushi smiled and affirmed it to be so. With his fingers softly splayed on her stomach as though protecting it from the outside world, he promised his unborn child that, he would take care of it and make sure nothing bad would ever touch it. He would strive his utmost to be a better father than his own ever was to him. While he promised, his voice choked and kissed her tummy repeatedly. With this, he admitted to his wife and his unborn child that he had a lousy childhood that he would never wish upon his child. He wished it would experience nothing but love, peace, security and all the things that were necessary to grow into a healthy child. When the child grew up and thought of fairness and integrity, he wanted it to think of him and his life. This showed how much he wanted to gain credence in the eyes of his child, one that he had lacked for his father in his life.
As he buried his face against the soft skin of her stomach, she could feel his tears against her skin, and held him close for a long moment. Then he asked how did she know that she was carrying? She frowned at the strange way that she found out and said, that it was the most amazing thing, could he ever imagine she, Khushi, refusing jalebi! Arnav's face lit with a smile at her admission and at the thought of such an incomprehensible act and nodded, that he could not. He was amused at her dependence on that sweet meat and her confidence of never disliking jalebis. She told him with a serious note in her voice that, Buaji had prepared jalebi for her, and the minute she opened the bin, she almost threw up at the smell. So she knew there was something very wrong with her basically. Her words made Arnav stare at her in wonder for he knew not a time when Khushi would turn her face from jalebi, more so when her Buaji had prepared them for her Titliyaa! She smiled as she told him that she had been to their family doctor who had directed her to a gynecologist. It was then she had realized that the problem lay not with the jalebi, but with the Li'l Arnav Singh Raizada growing inside her. Arnav, who now felt the information seep in clearly, what the report really meant, was gloriously happy. He stood up and hugged her tight breathing out, Khushi... As Khushi burrowed in to his arms, feeling safe and content, he told her that, this was the best Diwali of his life. Khushi smiled contently as he told her that this was the best Diwali gift she could ever give him. His lips that ever so gently touched hers, soon changed to raining kisses on her face and lips, punctuating the words with addictive kisses, some sweet as honey, some hot as chilly, but sizzling all the way through. She felt happiness stirring inside her grow wings, let loose, and fly. Khushi whispered with a serious face asking Arnav to promise her and he without knowing what she wanted from him did so with utmost love. She asked him to promise her that, whatever happened in the future, whether good or bad, they would always be together. He vowed to fulfill that. For them, this was the beginning of their family, where life begins and love never ends. As he scooped her up in his arms and carried her to bed, she pouted asking him to promise that even if they were blessed with an army of children, he would always love her the most. He knew anyone could have caught his eye but it took someone special to catch his heart and the most worthwhile person to cherish and adore in his life was the person who loved him when he was not really very lovable. That for him was Khushi was without any doubt. Arnav, smiling against her lips, loving this dependence of her on him, vowed to her that he would fulfill her wishes and she would always be his first and best Sanka Devi, for she was the best thing that ever happened to him. With her query he knew that he had gained credence in her eyes much beyond his expectations and he was thrilled by it.
In this update we see Arnav lending credence to their marriage in the eyes of the world showing that it was he who was blessed to have been accepted by Khushi as her life-partner. We see Arnav's apology gaining credence in the eyes of Khushi and Khushi too giving credence to his apology opens up to state her thoughts, likes and dislikes. Arnav's words to his unborn child shows how much he wanted a father who had some credibility that he could look upon in his life.
That is why it is titled CREDENCE.
"The path of sound credence is through the thick forest of skepticism"
~ George Jean Nathan
SAVING KHUSHI is about saving Khushi from Shyam. It is also the saving of the Khush or Happiness of Raizadas' and Guptas' in general and Arnav, Anjali and Khushi in particular. By putting many bad memories to rest they have made a new life for themselves. It was a beautiful narration that began with the Diwali, where the lights went out plunging into darkness and ended with another Diwali, with the lights glowing bright. Lovely story indeed! Wonderful work Smita.
"We delight in the beauty of the butterfly. But rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty"
~ Mary Angelou
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
ADDENDUM:
It has been a lovely journey and my heartfelt thanks to all the readers for their immense encouragement. Thank you dears.
Rashmi.
Manmarziyaan (Lootera)
Part 14
Khushi
handed over a tray laden with nutritious food for Di to HP, and turned her
attention to making breakfast for all.
As she
diced apples for Mami, she felt a gust of wind ruffle her hair and smiled.
Arnavji was somewhere close to her.
She
realised how close he was when his hot breath raised goosebumps on the fine
skin of her nape. Khushi shuddered helplessly, her lashes falling over her
eyes.
“Khushi…”
he murmured against her skin.
“Hhmmm…”
she moaned.
“Something
is burning…” his voice held laughter.
Khushi
sniffed daintily. It must be her senses that were going up in fire, she
thought, her head swimming.
Suddenly her eyes flew open. She looked at the
stove. A charred roti looked at her balefully from the skillet.
Anjali
refused the tray of food and decided to come down for breakfast. All sat around the table, sharing the meal. NK & Akash tried to bring a
smile on Anjali’s wan face by fooling around, and succeeded in their efforts. Arnav, Nani,
Payal, Buaji, Amma, Babuji, & Mami heaved silent sighs of relief at the
sight.
Khushi sat
by Arnav, and smiled at him, her eyes twinkling with happiness at the sight of
Anjali’s smile.
Arnav smiled back. His Di was on the mend. It was only a matter
of time before she started taking an interest in life.
The Guptas
left soon after breakfast.
Buaji whispered to Arnav on her way out, “Bitwaa,
bring Anjali Bitiyaa to Laxmi Nagar. Let her stay there for a few days. We will
keep her busy there, and by the grace of Nandkisore, she will heal soon.”
Arnav
nodded. “I will, Buaji. As soon as I can.”
Buaji
pinched his chin fondly as she left.
“Khushi…
come up to our room.” he whispered in to the phone.
“Arnavji!”
she whispered, scandalised. “Now? I am in the kitchen with Jiji, making lunch.
All the others are in the living room. What will they think if they see me
going up?”
She cut the call before he could importune her further and weaken
her resolve to behave in a decorous manner in the presence of their family.
“Khushi, I
want a glass of juice.” he called again on her phone. “Santra juice.” he added, smiling
thinking of how she had poured mango juice in his shoes as she couldn’t find
orange juice…
Khushi
smiled. “Ji. I will make it now.”
Arnav
waited impatiently for Khushi to bring the juice to him, pacing the room like a
tiger on prowl. There was a knock on the door. He turned around eagerly to see
HP standing there with a tray in his hands.
Arnav
stared at him, speechless with anger as HP placed the tray on the low table and
asked him, “Arnav Bhaiyya, do you want anything else?”
“No.” the
lion growled.
HP, who
knew what was good for him, beat a hasty retreat.
Arnav strode
to the top of the stairs and yelled, “Khushi! Khushi!”
Nani, Mami,
NK, & Akash looked at him in surprise.
Anjali was resting in her room with
her nurse keeping vigil over her.
Payal
looked at Khushi with startled eyes. “Why is Arnavji so angry, Khushi?”
“I…I don’t
know, Jiji.” Khushi stammered.
“Khushi, tum bhi na! Go and
find out!” Payal urged her.
Khushi wiped
her hands on a towel and ran out of the kitchen.
“Khushiji,
Nannav is so ghoosa!” NK whispered. “Are you not scared to face him?”
Khushi
smiled wanly at him on her way past him.
“Kaa hua,
Khussi Bitiyya? Why is Chotey so angry?” Nani asked her, looking warily at a
fuming Chotey standing looking down at them.
“I don’t
know, Naniji…” Khushi blushed as she ran up the steps.
Nani looked
at Mami, and both of them looked down to hide their smiles.
Khushi ran
up the steps and came face to face with Arnavji, standing with his feet apart
and his arms crossed, a cross look on his face.
She
frowned.
“Why did
you call me, Arnavji? I have work in the kitchen.” she pursed her lips.
Arnav
caught hold of her arm and led her away to their room and secured the door after
them.
He nudged
her against the door, crowding her with his body.
“I missed
you.” he whispered in her ear.
Her eyes
flew open. “But…but how can you miss me? I was in the house, in the kitchen…”
“I missed
you in my arms.” He proceeded to hug her tightly, burying his face against her
throat, lapping the skin behind her ear with his tongue…
“Arnavji!”
Khushi gasped.
He bit her
ear lobe.
Khushi
yelped in surprise and pleasure.
His hands
went to the tempting curves of her waist, left bare by the sari. His fingers
rimmed her navel as she jerked in shock, falling heavily against the door at
her back.
“Always
wear saris at home, Khushi." he murmured.
"Do you remember, Arnavji?" Khushi whispered. "You selected this sari for me... when I came with my relations to meet Nani on Jiji's wedding day...." her voice trailed away.
"I remember... You look beautiful in it...and out of it...Khushi...I love you in sari, Khushi.... Wear them... always. They are more…more convenient.” He whispered as he
proceeded to show her exactly how convenient saris were.
A long time
later, Khushi buried her face against his neck and panted, “What will the
others think of us?”
“They will
think that I love you, a lot!” he replied, capturing her pink lips with his
hungry ones.
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Part 14.
This update is about a fuzzy concept and can mean many different things to many people. It is a mental or emotional state of well-being characterized by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. In a nutshell, it means HAPPINESS.
Khushi prepared a tray laden with sumptuous as well as nutritious food for Di to cheer her, and handed it to HP to be taken to Di. Once she had done it she gave her attention to the preparation of breakfast for the rest. As she sliced crispy apples wafer thin for Mami she felt the familiar gust of wind surround her and making her hair play truant. It delighted her as she knew for sure that her Arnavji was close-by. She only realized how close when his hot breath, caressed the skin of her nape giving her a run of goose bumps, for his presence always brought in exhilaration, reached out to her heart and invariably dragged out the deepest wishes in her. His nearness made her senses go crazy, winding her in a maze of love and she shuddered helplessly with her lashes falling over her eyes. His soft murmur, Khushi.., against her skin did not help to bring her out of her dreamy euphoria but his voice only induced her to let out a moan that came from deep inside. His voice, that held a hint of laughter that sounded to her like a tinkle of a jingle as he said, something is burning, had her sniffing daintily still with her eyes closed and thought contently that it must be her senses that were swimming and set afire. Suddenly as she realized where she was, her eyes flew open and gazed at stove to find a charred roti looking balefully at her from the skillet!
Anjali refused to have her meal from a tray in her room. She decided with a good spirit to come down and partake the delicious breakfast with the rest of the family. As all sat around the table sharing the meal, NK and Akash goofed around trying to bring a smile on their Di's wan face and their lighthearted fooling succeeded in doing so. Arnav, Nani,Payal, Buaji, Amma, Babuji and Mami heaved silent sighs of relief at the sight, each thanking their beloved deity for giving Anjali the strength, to bear so much of suffering with equanimity. They rejoiced at the sight of Anjali who was mingling with the rest. Khushi sat by Arnav and smiled at him, her eyes twinkling with happiness at the sight of the smile that lit Anjali's face. Arnav smiled back, pleased with the knowledge that his Di was on the mend. Di's willingness to smile was a ray of hope that led him to understand that it was only a matter of time before she started to take an interest in life and the healing process had started. It filled him with optimism knowing that she had made a decision to turn over a new leaf. That by itself was the starting point for her life ahead. It cheered him up no end.
The Guptas' left soon after breakfast. Buaji on her way out whispered to Arnav, asking him to bring Anjali Bitiyaa to Laxmi Nagar and let her stay with them for a few days for a change. They would keep her busy engaging her mind with varied activities and meeting their neighbours, new people to her, so as not to dwell on the past few days or the fiasco of Shyam being in her life and playing fool with her. With the change in scenario she would soon be on the mend and heal quickly. For they all wanted the old cheerful, vivacious Anjali Bitiyaa back in their midst. Arnav was touched by her genial warmth that extended to his sister too. Arnav agreed and promised her, that he would as soon as he could. Buaji pinched his chin with a fondness that showed how much she adored Arnav Bitwaa, just as she would if he were her own son.
While Khushi was in the kitchen preparing lunch along with Payal, she got a call. It was from her Laad Governor asking her in a whisper, to come to the room. Khushi who was scandalized to hear such a blatant request from him at that time of the day, knowing very well what that request meant, knowing very well that she would be the butt of the jokes, teasing and sniggering, asked him, did he mean it as of now? She told him that she was in the kitchen midway through the preparations for lunch along with her Jiji, and the rest were in the living room. She asked him, what will they think and their reaction be if they see her going up to the room? She cut the call before he could badger her to submission and weaken her resolve to behave in a decorous manner in the presence of their family, for she knew it took very little on his part to tear her defense and then, she could neither deny him nor her heart would obey the faint reminders coming from her mind. She knew that the time spent with him would be filled with bliss and she would be easily transported to seventh heaven.
Again, came the call from Arnav, with a request of needing a glass of juice, that too specifically it to be orange juice. He remembered with a fond smile, how she had poured out mango juice in his shoes as she could not find orange juice in the house, making him realize the prank played on him only when the shoes squished just like baby boots at every step he took! He could only shake his head with a smile at her playfulness that had bordered on childishness while she tried to shake him out of the rut he had fallen into and he had time and again fallen prey to it but had covered his defeat, her steady chipping of the stone, under the veneer of anger. Khushi with a gleeful smile agreed to make it for him knowing very well what it entailed.
Arnav, for whom, patience, not being one of the virtues that he had any inclination to master, paced his room ready to make the carpet thread bare. He was like a majestic feline on the prowl all set to pounce on its prey the minute it enters the vicinity and comes within the catching distance. For him, the time for her to come up started with the minute he requested to make it and at the knock on the door, he turned around eagerly. With a smile lit on his face, his eyes rested on the lean form with a tray in the hand. Arnav did a double take and much to his chagrin, it was HP who had brought in his glass of juice. Arnav was speechless with anger, and stared at him. As HP placed the tray on the table and asked, whether Arnav Bhaiyya needed anything else, his growl, no, had the poor fellow scoot away, for HP knew from the years of practice, when it was prudent to beat a hasty retreat. He knew, though Arnav Bhaiyya growled, he possessed a heart of gold inside.
For Arnav, Khushi not coming up to their room and outwitting him was the last straw. He strode to the top of the stairs and bellowed out, Khushi! Khushi! Nani, Mami, NK and Akash looked at him in surprise. Anjali was resting in her room with her nurse in attendance. Payal, who was working alongside Khushi in the kitchen, asked her with startled eyes, as to why Arnavji was so angry? Khushi's stammered, that she does not know Jiji, made Payal urge her to go and find out, with a playful admonishment, she was one of a kind! Khushi leaving her work, wiping her hands on a towel, ran out of the kitchen. A concerned NK came to her and whispered that, Nannav was in his very angry mode. Was she not scared to face him? Khushi gave him a watery smile on her way past him. When Nani asked her, what happened, why was Chotey angry, with her eyes warily resting on a fuming Chotey, who like a lion gazing down from its den in the mountain at its subjects on the grassland below, was standing at the top of the stairs and looking down at them. Her rushed, she does not know Naniji,accompanied by a blush springing on her face, as she dashed out just like a deer, hopping sprightly up the steps, was a tell-tale sign by itself. It amused Nani who looked at Mami and both looked down to hide their snicker. They were happy to see this form of their Chotey, and to think their Bitwaa, who would sizzle and scorn at the word love, would now be in this enchanted state was definitely something to rejoice and a source of much merriment.
As Khushi reached the top of the steps she came face to face with her Arnavji, a piqued Arnavji, standing with his feet apart, his arms crossed with a stubborn and peeved look enhancing his sharp features. Khushi was not the one to give in easily. She frowned and her dainty mouth like a crimson rose curled up with lips pursed tight, showing her disapproval at his action, asked him, what was the matter? Why was she summoned, making her leave the work in the kitchen? Without uttering a word, Arnav caught hold of her arm and led her away to their room and secured the latch once inside. Cornering her against the door in jubilation and crowding her with his body, he whispered in her ear that, he missed her terribly. All the while she was viewing him with slit eyes wondering what was to befall and bracing herself for whatever it was, suddenly let her eyes open wide hearing his declaration and in a puzzled tone asked him, how could he miss her when she was in the house, in the kitchen? His explanation that, he missed her in his arms, followed by wrapping his arms around her in a tight hug, burying his face against her throat and his tongue lapping the skin behind her ear in elation, making her quiver and rock just like a boat when the waves lap its sides. Khushi gasped, Arnavji! and in response, a pleased Arnav nipped her earlobe making her yelp in surprise and pleasure. His hands forayed into the tempting curves of her waist that to his mind seem to beckon to touch. It was a visual sensuous treat for him to see his wife in a sari, his fingers that traversed her skin, sought her navel ran a finger along its edge, making her jerk in shock and fall heavily against the door at her back. He showed his approval at her wearing a sari by murmuring in her ear to always wear a sari at home. Her heart gladdened at his appreciation and asked him, does he remember selecting the sari she had draped? The one he had chosen for her when she had come with her relations to meet Naniji on her Jiji's wedding day... her voice trailed away, as all coherent thoughts seem to vanish into thin air with his fingers kindling a flame in her. His whispered words that, he remembers it, draped in it she looks beautiful and ravishing just as delectable out of it too. He told her that, he loves to see her in sari and asked her to wear it always at home for it was one heck of a convenient garment as he proceeded to show her exactly how convenient saris' were on their way to blissful contentment. A long time later, Khushi buried her face against his neck and panted what would the others think of them. His ready reply, that they would think that he loves her a lot, came from a distance, as he was busy yielding to the persuasion of her pink lips that were like dewy rose buds peeping out of snow calling on to kiss. With his hungry lips settling on it making music like a nightingale in roses, they settled themselves to be transported to their personal paradise where he and she, were the only inhabitants.
That is why this is titled, HAPPINESS.
"The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved, loved for ourselves, rather, loved in spite of ourselves"
~ Victor Hugo
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Part 14.
This update is about a fuzzy concept and can mean many different things to many people. It is a mental or emotional state of well-being characterized by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. In a nutshell, it means HAPPINESS.
Khushi prepared a tray laden with sumptuous as well as nutritious food for Di to cheer her, and handed it to HP to be taken to Di. Once she had done it she gave her attention to the preparation of breakfast for the rest. As she sliced crispy apples wafer thin for Mami she felt the familiar gust of wind surround her and making her hair play truant. It delighted her as she knew for sure that her Arnavji was close-by. She only realized how close when his hot breath, caressed the skin of her nape giving her a run of goose bumps, for his presence always brought in exhilaration, reached out to her heart and invariably dragged out the deepest wishes in her. His nearness made her senses go crazy, winding her in a maze of love and she shuddered helplessly with her lashes falling over her eyes. His soft murmur, Khushi.., against her skin did not help to bring her out of her dreamy euphoria but his voice only induced her to let out a moan that came from deep inside. His voice, that held a hint of laughter that sounded to her like a tinkle of a jingle as he said, something is burning, had her sniffing daintily still with her eyes closed and thought contently that it must be her senses that were swimming and set afire. Suddenly as she realized where she was, her eyes flew open and gazed at stove to find a charred roti looking balefully at her from the skillet!
Anjali refused to have her meal from a tray in her room. She decided with a good spirit to come down and partake the delicious breakfast with the rest of the family. As all sat around the table sharing the meal, NK and Akash goofed around trying to bring a smile on their Di's wan face and their lighthearted fooling succeeded in doing so. Arnav, Nani,Payal, Buaji, Amma, Babuji and Mami heaved silent sighs of relief at the sight, each thanking their beloved deity for giving Anjali the strength, to bear so much of suffering with equanimity. They rejoiced at the sight of Anjali who was mingling with the rest. Khushi sat by Arnav and smiled at him, her eyes twinkling with happiness at the sight of the smile that lit Anjali's face. Arnav smiled back, pleased with the knowledge that his Di was on the mend. Di's willingness to smile was a ray of hope that led him to understand that it was only a matter of time before she started to take an interest in life and the healing process had started. It filled him with optimism knowing that she had made a decision to turn over a new leaf. That by itself was the starting point for her life ahead. It cheered him up no end.
The Guptas' left soon after breakfast. Buaji on her way out whispered to Arnav, asking him to bring Anjali Bitiyaa to Laxmi Nagar and let her stay with them for a few days for a change. They would keep her busy engaging her mind with varied activities and meeting their neighbours, new people to her, so as not to dwell on the past few days or the fiasco of Shyam being in her life and playing fool with her. With the change in scenario she would soon be on the mend and heal quickly. For they all wanted the old cheerful, vivacious Anjali Bitiyaa back in their midst. Arnav was touched by her genial warmth that extended to his sister too. Arnav agreed and promised her, that he would as soon as he could. Buaji pinched his chin with a fondness that showed how much she adored Arnav Bitwaa, just as she would if he were her own son.
While Khushi was in the kitchen preparing lunch along with Payal, she got a call. It was from her Laad Governor asking her in a whisper, to come to the room. Khushi who was scandalized to hear such a blatant request from him at that time of the day, knowing very well what that request meant, knowing very well that she would be the butt of the jokes, teasing and sniggering, asked him, did he mean it as of now? She told him that she was in the kitchen midway through the preparations for lunch along with her Jiji, and the rest were in the living room. She asked him, what will they think and their reaction be if they see her going up to the room? She cut the call before he could badger her to submission and weaken her resolve to behave in a decorous manner in the presence of their family, for she knew it took very little on his part to tear her defense and then, she could neither deny him nor her heart would obey the faint reminders coming from her mind. She knew that the time spent with him would be filled with bliss and she would be easily transported to seventh heaven.
Again, came the call from Arnav, with a request of needing a glass of juice, that too specifically it to be orange juice. He remembered with a fond smile, how she had poured out mango juice in his shoes as she could not find orange juice in the house, making him realize the prank played on him only when the shoes squished just like baby boots at every step he took! He could only shake his head with a smile at her playfulness that had bordered on childishness while she tried to shake him out of the rut he had fallen into and he had time and again fallen prey to it but had covered his defeat, her steady chipping of the stone, under the veneer of anger. Khushi with a gleeful smile agreed to make it for him knowing very well what it entailed.
Arnav, for whom, patience, not being one of the virtues that he had any inclination to master, paced his room ready to make the carpet thread bare. He was like a majestic feline on the prowl all set to pounce on its prey the minute it enters the vicinity and comes within the catching distance. For him, the time for her to come up started with the minute he requested to make it and at the knock on the door, he turned around eagerly. With a smile lit on his face, his eyes rested on the lean form with a tray in the hand. Arnav did a double take and much to his chagrin, it was HP who had brought in his glass of juice. Arnav was speechless with anger, and stared at him. As HP placed the tray on the table and asked, whether Arnav Bhaiyya needed anything else, his growl, no, had the poor fellow scoot away, for HP knew from the years of practice, when it was prudent to beat a hasty retreat. He knew, though Arnav Bhaiyya growled, he possessed a heart of gold inside.
For Arnav, Khushi not coming up to their room and outwitting him was the last straw. He strode to the top of the stairs and bellowed out, Khushi! Khushi! Nani, Mami, NK and Akash looked at him in surprise. Anjali was resting in her room with her nurse in attendance. Payal, who was working alongside Khushi in the kitchen, asked her with startled eyes, as to why Arnavji was so angry? Khushi's stammered, that she does not know Jiji, made Payal urge her to go and find out, with a playful admonishment, she was one of a kind! Khushi leaving her work, wiping her hands on a towel, ran out of the kitchen. A concerned NK came to her and whispered that, Nannav was in his very angry mode. Was she not scared to face him? Khushi gave him a watery smile on her way past him. When Nani asked her, what happened, why was Chotey angry, with her eyes warily resting on a fuming Chotey, who like a lion gazing down from its den in the mountain at its subjects on the grassland below, was standing at the top of the stairs and looking down at them. Her rushed, she does not know Naniji,accompanied by a blush springing on her face, as she dashed out just like a deer, hopping sprightly up the steps, was a tell-tale sign by itself. It amused Nani who looked at Mami and both looked down to hide their snicker. They were happy to see this form of their Chotey, and to think their Bitwaa, who would sizzle and scorn at the word love, would now be in this enchanted state was definitely something to rejoice and a source of much merriment.
As Khushi reached the top of the steps she came face to face with her Arnavji, a piqued Arnavji, standing with his feet apart, his arms crossed with a stubborn and peeved look enhancing his sharp features. Khushi was not the one to give in easily. She frowned and her dainty mouth like a crimson rose curled up with lips pursed tight, showing her disapproval at his action, asked him, what was the matter? Why was she summoned, making her leave the work in the kitchen? Without uttering a word, Arnav caught hold of her arm and led her away to their room and secured the latch once inside. Cornering her against the door in jubilation and crowding her with his body, he whispered in her ear that, he missed her terribly. All the while she was viewing him with slit eyes wondering what was to befall and bracing herself for whatever it was, suddenly let her eyes open wide hearing his declaration and in a puzzled tone asked him, how could he miss her when she was in the house, in the kitchen? His explanation that, he missed her in his arms, followed by wrapping his arms around her in a tight hug, burying his face against her throat and his tongue lapping the skin behind her ear in elation, making her quiver and rock just like a boat when the waves lap its sides. Khushi gasped, Arnavji! and in response, a pleased Arnav nipped her earlobe making her yelp in surprise and pleasure. His hands forayed into the tempting curves of her waist that to his mind seem to beckon to touch. It was a visual sensuous treat for him to see his wife in a sari, his fingers that traversed her skin, sought her navel ran a finger along its edge, making her jerk in shock and fall heavily against the door at her back. He showed his approval at her wearing a sari by murmuring in her ear to always wear a sari at home. Her heart gladdened at his appreciation and asked him, does he remember selecting the sari she had draped? The one he had chosen for her when she had come with her relations to meet Naniji on her Jiji's wedding day... her voice trailed away, as all coherent thoughts seem to vanish into thin air with his fingers kindling a flame in her. His whispered words that, he remembers it, draped in it she looks beautiful and ravishing just as delectable out of it too. He told her that, he loves to see her in sari and asked her to wear it always at home for it was one heck of a convenient garment as he proceeded to show her exactly how convenient saris' were on their way to blissful contentment. A long time later, Khushi buried her face against his neck and panted what would the others think of them. His ready reply, that they would think that he loves her a lot, came from a distance, as he was busy yielding to the persuasion of her pink lips that were like dewy rose buds peeping out of snow calling on to kiss. With his hungry lips settling on it making music like a nightingale in roses, they settled themselves to be transported to their personal paradise where he and she, were the only inhabitants.
That is why this is titled, HAPPINESS.
"The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved, loved for ourselves, rather, loved in spite of ourselves"
~ Victor Hugo
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
Part 15
“Chotey! I
was thinking…”
“Haan, Di?”
“I would
like to learn painting…”
“Di, if
that is what you want, I will arrange someone to teach you at home. Aman will
know…” Arnav began.
“No,
Chotey. I think it is time I started seeing more of the world. They have
evening classes at the college nearby…” Anjali said softly.
Arnav
swallowed hard. His Di was finally growing up.
“Anything
you want, Di.” he promised.
“You will
meet new people, Anjali Bitiyaa, and make new friends.” Nani said, smiling
approvingly.
Mami nodded.
“It ijj better than staring at the phor (four) balls (walls) of your roomwaa,
Anjali Bitiyaa.”
“Di, I will
take you to your classes on the first day!” NK offered.
Akash
raised one eyebrow in question.
“It will
get her lots of friends.” NK asserted. “As soon as I walk in with Di, all the
girls will surround her to find out who this handsome chikni chameli is!”
Akash
buried his head in his hands as all laughed.
“Arnavji!”
Khushi hesitated, twisting the fringe of her dupatta in her fingers.
He looked up
from his laptop to see her standing by the door.
“Kya hua,
Khushi? Kuch chahiye tha?” he asked, his husky voice inviting her to come to
him.
Khushi took
a couple of steps in to the room.
“Woh kya
he, Arnavji…I was thinking….”
“Kya?”
“Buaji
called just now. Arnavji, it has been very long since I visited Amma, Babuji,
and Buaji…. I was thinking….” Khushi hesitated.
“Oh…” Arnav
pondered on the problem and came up with a solution. “Suno, I have to go to the
office after lunch. You come with me, Khushi. I will drop you off at Buaji’s.”
He smiled. “I will get a chance to meet them too. You spend the afternoon
there, and in the evening, as I return from the office, I will get you.”
“Ji.”
Khushi smiled.
Arnav drove
towards Laxmi Nagar, stealing glances at his wife’s happy face even as he
navigated congested roads and rickshaws bent on doing acrobatics in the middle of the road. As he stopped
the vehicle before Buaji’s house, Arnav caught hold of her hand.
Khushi
looked at him.
“Khushi,
what will you do all afternoon?” he asked softly, his eyes devouring her face.
Khushi
smiled happily. “I will talk to Amma, Babuji, & Buaji, go to Kamla Maasi’s
house, play with my bacha party when they get home from school, eat golgappe
with them…”
“Save one
for me.” Arnav said, his husky voice pricking her skin like a thousand needles.
Khushi
looked at him with wide eyes and nodded, her cheeks rosy.
He lifted her
hand and pressed his lips to her fingers.
“Arnavji!”
she gasped. “Someone might see us!” She looked around frantically. The road was
littered with her Buaji’s friends and neighbours. She pulled her hand away.
Arnav
smiled, opened her door and his, and accompanied her in to Buaji’s house.
“Arnav
Bitwaa! What a surprise, Nandkisore!” Buaji caught hold of his hand and pulled
him in to the house. “Garima, dekho kaun aaya he! Your damadji is here! Bring
the thaali and do aarti for him for he steps in to our house only rarely, on
Diwali and Janmashtami!” Buaji teased him and pinched his chin.
Arnav
smiled.
“Buaji,
that is not fair! Arnavji was busy…” Khushi tried to defend her husband.
“Acha?”
Buaji caught hold of her by her ear. “Protecting your husband from us, are you?”
“Buaji!”
Khushi squirmed, trying to save her ear from Buaji’s strong and firm hold.
Arnav smiled.
“Arnav
Bitwaa!” Garima came pushing Babuji’s wheelchair, caught him by the arm, and led
him to a chair. “It has been so long since we saw you.”
“Ji. I was
caught up in some work.” he explained, and greeted Babuji who nodded and smiled
at him.
“How is
Naniji?” Garima asked.
“She is
fine.” Arnav smiled.
“And Anjali
Bitiyaa?” Buaji asked.
“Much, much
better.” Arnav smiled. “She is learning to paint now at a college nearby.”
“Acha he,
Nandkisore!” Buaji exclaimed. “What will she do all day and night if she sits at
home? She will just worry and fret over everything that happened. It is better
that she is busy.”
Khushi
served tea to all of them, and sat by her husband as he talked to her family.
“Is it just
me or does Babuji look better?” Arnav asked diffidently. “His hand…I think he
moved it more confidently and smiled better…”
Amma and
Buaji smiled. “He is better, Babua. The doctor is very happy with him.”
Arnav
smiled at Babuji. “When you have to go to the hospital, just give me a call. I
will send a car with a driver.”
Amma and
Garima nodded gratefully.
Arnav saw
the time on the clock in the room and jumped up. “I have a meeting in a few
minutes. Amma, Buaji, Babuji, I need to leave.”
“Acha,
Babua!” Amma, Buaji, & Khushi stood up, disappointed.
Buaji
turned to Khushi, “You go and show your balma out, Sanka Devi!”
Khushi
flushed as she accompanied Arnav to his car.
“Khushi, I
will get you in the evening, as soon as I finish work.” Arnav said as he opened
the car door.
“Ji.”
Khushi smiled at him.
He looked
at her lips for a long moment and lifted hot eyes to hers.
Khushi
flushed, feeling hot shivers shake her body.
Reluctantly,
he got in and drove off, his eyes on her image in his rear view mirror.
“Arnavji, are
you busy?” Khushi asked.
“Not for
you. Kya hua, Khushi?” he asked, a small smile on his lips.
“Arnavji… I
was thinking… I was thinking I will stay here for a couple of days…” Khushi
said.
“What the!”
“I will be
back on Thursday.” Khushi said, hoping he wouldn’t get angry.
“No way.
Khushi, you said you were going for half a day. You are supposed to come back
home with me today…” Arnav paused, realising he sounded too hyper about
something that shouldn’t be a big deal but was.
“Arnavji, I
am just 2km away from your house, not in another city. I am staying with my
family, not strangers. And it is only for 2 days.” Khushi tried to sound
reasonable.
But her reasons
were washed away by the flood of panic that burst over him in tsunami waves.
“No. No,
Khushi. I want you back in RM today.” ASR sounded his decision.
Mrs. ASR
asked, her nose making a statement in the air, “And if I am not?”
“I will
make you pay for it, Khushi. No one messes with ASR.” the lion growled.
“Acha? Then
let me tell you that no one messes with Mrs. ASR too.” She slammed the phone
down.
Arnav
glared at the phone in his hand, fuming with all the ire of the man who has
lots to say but no one to hear him.
Khushi
looked nervously at the phone. It was evening, about time for Arnavji to leave
his office. What would he do, drag her back to RM? Should she call him? No.
How dare he order her around? Was she HP? Or Amanji? No, she was his wife.
Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada. No one could push her around. She drew in a
deep breath and prayed to Devi Maiyya for courage.
“Titliyaa,
are you sure you want to stay here for 2 days, Nandkisore?” Buaji asked.
“Ji, Buaji.”
Khushi tried to smile.
“Leaving
Arnav Bitwaa alone in RM…” Buaji grumbled. “Who will take care of him if you
are sitting here?”
“Buaji,
your Arnav Bitwaa is old enough to take care of himself. For your information,
he has been taking care of himself for the past 28 years without any help from
me.” Khushi fumed. “And he has a house full of family there. He couldn’t be
alone if he tried.”
“Acha! You
fought with him, didn’t you? That is why you want to stay here for two days.”
Buaji exclaimed with an air of discovery.
Garima chuckled behind her hand and Babuji
smiled.
“Hhmmmpppfff!”
Khushi made her view clear as she left her amused family, went to her room and
locked the door in a huff.
A few
minutes later, there was a knock on the door.
“Khussi,
open the door.” Garima called.
Khushi
wiped her tears away with her fingers and went to open the door.
Her Amma
stood there with a tray holding 2 tea cups and a dish of snacks in her hands.
Khushi
frowned. “Amma, why did you bring the tea here? I will come out…” her voice trailed
away as she saw the figure standing behind her Amma.
“Arnavji?”
she gasped.
Arnav
elbowed his way in to her room, lugging a bag behind him.
Khushi
stared at him, her mouth open to catch flies.
Garima placed
the tea tray on the table and turned to Arnav. She cupped his lean cheek in one
palm.
“Damadji, rest for a while. I will call you when it is time for dinner.
Khussi, take care of Babua. Help him unpack and make space for his things among
all the junk you have hoarded in your cabinets.”
Khushi
could only stare in silence as her Amma left, closing the door after her.
Arnav
locked the door and turned to look at a stupefied Khushi.
“Khushi,
were you crying?” He cupped her cheek and ran a gentle finger down the curve. “Why?
Because I got angry with you?”
She nodded
and then shook her head to mean no.
Arnav
smiled. “Yes or no?”
“Both. I
cried, but not because you were angry with me. I don’t feel like crying when
you shout at me. I feel like shouting back and I do. So that’s alright, Arnavji.”
Arnav smiled.
His employees should hear her. They would die of shock to hear her dismissing
his anger as of no consequence when he had the ability to make grown men cry
with one look.
“Then why
did you cry?” he asked tenderly.
“Because
Buaji said I should not have left you alone in RM.” she confessed, her eyes
lowered.
Arnav
swallowed.
“I told her
that you wouldn’t be alone there, but…” she paused.
“But…?”
Khushi
looked away, lost for words for once.
“I am
always lonely without you, Khushi.” he confessed in a whisper, his fingers
deftly freeing himself from his formal clothes.
Khushi
stared at him, her eyes like saucers.
“And
everyone knows that. When I went home from office and told them that you were
going to stay here for two days, Nani scolded me for leaving you alone.”
Khushi
gasped.
“And Mami
told me that I should have stayed back with you and let my in-laws take care of
me.” he smiled. He threw away the coat, waistcoat and tie, and pulled two
buttons of his shirt out of their buttonholes.
Khushi
looked at him. “Naniji and Mamiji asked you to come here?” She couldn’t believe
her ears.
“Yes, because
they can understand that you want to spend some time with your family. And because
they know how miserable I would be without you.” Arnav smiled.
A slow
smile bloomed on Khushi’s lips.
“HP ran to
place my bag in the car. He was so happy to pack me off!” Arnav joked. “He didn’t
want me shouting at him or breaking things as I would do if I were alone in RM.”
Khushi rushed
to her husband and threw her arms around him. “I am so glad that you are here,
Arnavji.” she whispered against his neck, burrowing closer to him. “As soon as
I finished fighting with you, I started missing you…” she confessed.
“Good.” He said
against her cheek as his lips moved towards hers. His arms pulled her as close
as they could.
“Good?” she
murmured, looking up at him.
“Very good.”
His eager lips covered her startled ones, stopping her from asking any more
questions.
Not that
Khushi wanted to ask any more questions. Words, she felt, were vastly overrated
anyway. Action was better. Much better.
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Part 15.
This update is about the fact or process of doing something, typically to achieve an aim. It is also the way in which something has an effect or influence. A word that describes this is ACTION.
Hearing Anjali call, Chotey, and then hesitate to express her thoughts by just saying that she was thinking, Arnav encouraged her to open up by asking her to tell him what she wanted. Her hesitant, she wanted to learn painting, had Arnav tell her, if that was what she wanted he would arrange for someone to teach her at home, for Aman will be able to arrange things to satisfaction. But he was cut short by Anjali who told him softly but with a determination and a clear cut idea, that was not what she wanted. She needed to get out and see more of the world and its ways. She knows that they have evening classes at the nearby college. That was one step that was bound to please everyone, for it was a sign of control action of seizing her life into her hands by thinking for herself and aloud. Arnav felt overwhelmed to see his Di coming out of her cocoon and wanting to come out of her penchant to create the dream world of her own. With this development he now knew, that she was turning a new leaf and her zest to seek new pastures was a welcome change. Arnav promised her anything she wants could be materialized. All she needed was to state it and he would help her to strive for it. He could see optimism in her attitude and that was essential to achieve anything. Knowing that, it is also the solid basis for her to gain courage and true progress in life, he was extremely happy at the step his Di was taking. Her decision met Nani's smiling approval too, who told her that she would meet new people and make new friends. Mami added that it was a right move. This activity was a more viable option than staring at the four walls confined in her room. NK's offer, that he would accompany her to the class on the first day, made Akash raise an eyebrow in silent query. NK's assertion that, it would fetch her lot of friends as soon as they walk in, as all the girls will fall for him and surround her asking who this handsome Jasmine flower was had Akash bury his head in his hands thinking of the actual effectiveness of NK's presence and all the rest let out belly laughter.
Khushi twirling the fringe of her dupatta with her fingers, nervously called out, Arnavji. Arnav looked up from his laptop to see her standing by the door and perceiving from her gestures that she needed to ask him something asked her, what happened? Did she need something? His husky voice was an open invitation to her to come near him. Khushi stepping inside the room, told him hesitantly, she was thinking... and stopped short wondering how to proceed. His prompt, what? giving her the necessary courage, made her continue that Buaji had called her and it had been quite a long time since she visited them and she was thinking... She again paused wondering how he would react. Realizing what she wanted to tell him, he pondered over the matter and with a smile he responded that he needed to go to his office after lunch and she could accompany him. He would drop her at Buaji's house and he too would get a chance to meet them. Then she could spend her afternoon with them and later in the evening on his way back from the office he would pick her up. Khushi smiled and agreed.
As they drove towards Laxmi Nagar, he kept sneaking glances at his wife's happy face and her liveliness and felt extremely happy that even his small gesture could bring out so much of happiness for her. The glimpses of her smiling visage did not let him stress over the fact that he had to negotiate the vehicle amidst the sneaky autos and congested roads. As he stopped the vehicle before Buaji's house, Arnav caught hold of her hand making Khushi look at him. With his eyes trained on her face, taking in his fill of his beauty, he asked her softly, what she will do all afternoon. Khushi was only glad to let him know what all she had planned for a lovely time there. She listed out that her top priority was to talk to Amma, Babuji and Buaji to her heart's content, then go to Kamla Maasi's house, later play with her neighbouring kids, her battalion of friends, when they get home from school, eat golgappe with them... As she was rattling on the list that she planned to do, he asked her to, save one for him, in a husky voice that was easy and pleasing to the ear. It was so mellow, filled with warmth and love, that she felt as if a beam of sunshine had been melted into sound. It sent tingles along her spine making her look with wide eyes and nod while her soft cheeks bloomed like wild roses. He lifted her hand and pressed his lips to her fingers making her gasp out Arnavji! Her reaction was both happy as well as uneasy. She was happy to be the recipient of his attention, uneasy lest this gesture be witnessed by somebody on the street. Telling him that, they were in public and anybody could see them, she looked around frantically, for the street was swarmed with Buaji's friends and neighbours. Quickly she pulled her hand away. Arnav smiled and opened her door and accompanied her in to Buaji's house.
Buaji who opened the door was surprised to see her Arnav Bitwaa and was extremely happy that she caught hold of his arm and pulled him into the house lest he went away from the threshold itself. Bubbling with happiness, she called out to Garima asking her, to come out to see who has graced their home! Her son-in-law has come and asked her to welcome him with aarti as he steps into their house rarely, on Diwali or Janmashtami! Buaji teased him and tweaked his chin. Her special brand of welcome made Arnav smile for he understood her feelings from the aura of happiness she was emanating. When Khushi in reply tried to defend her husband saying, that it was not a fair statement that Arnavji had been busy, Buaji caught hold of her by her ear and gently admonished, was that so? Protecting her husband from them, was she? Khushi's squeak, Buaji..., as she squirmed trying to save her ear from Buaji's strong and firm hold was watched by Arnav with a smile. Garima, who came out wheeling Babuji's chair, made Arnav sit on a chair saying that it had been quite a long time since they saw him. Arnav agreed saying that he was caught up with work and greeted Babuji who nodded and smiled by way of greeting.
Garima's query on, how Naniji was keeping, elicited a smile from him saying, that she was fine. Arnav for whom his Nani held a special place, the very thought of her always brought in a soft smile on his face. And Buaji's query on Anjali Bitiyaa, brought out a smile of relief in him and said that she was much better and it was more than what was expected of her. He added that, she was attending painting classes at a college nearby. Buaji showed her happiness and approval with her exclamation and asked what would she do all day and night if she sat at home? She will just waste herself away by fretting over everything that happened. It was good that she was keeping herself busy, involving herself in activities of her liking and not succumbing to unwanted thoughts. Khushi served tea to all of them, and sat by her husband as he talked to her family. Arnav asked them a bit diffidently, whether it was just him feeling so or has Babuji really improved? He had felt that Babuji's hand moved with more control over his reflexes and his smile was much less lopsided. Amma and Buaji smiled at him and in answer Buaji told him that his observation was correct and he has improved. The doctors were happy with his steady progress. Arnav feeling happy at this smiled at Babuji and asked to give him a call, when they have to go to the hospital, so that he could send a car with the driver. Amma and Buaji nodded gratefully.
As Arnav's eyes went to the clock he noted the time making him jump up saying, that he needed to rush as he had an appointment scheduled in a few minutes and sought their permission to leave. Though feeling disappointed at him having to leave so quickly, Buaji on behalf of the rest agreed and she turned to her Sanka Devi and asked her to accompany her beloved to his car. Khushi turned beet red at Buaji's words and accompanied Arnav. Arnav looking at Khushi as he opened the car door told her that he will come over and pick her as soon as he finishes his work in the evening. Khushi was all smiles to hear his words. Her smile made him gaze longingly at her lips and as he lifted his eyes to hers that showed what he really wanted to do, Khushi's lovely cheeks turned into blushing clouds, making her shiver and give rise to goose pimples. With great effort and utter reluctance, Arnav got into the car and drove away, his eyes glued on her image in his rear view mirror till it vanished.
When Khushi called Arnav and asked whether he was busy, he told her that, for her, he always had time and what happened. As he talked to her, a small smile hovered on his lips, for just the lilt in her voice made his heart lurch and smile, as it would let his imagination run riot... with pleasant and happy thoughts. Khushi with hesitation told him softly that, she was thinking that she would stay over there for a couple of days. The minute her words ended came the epithet, what the! She quickly added that, she would be back on Thursday; fervently hoping that he would not let his anger rule over him. His outright denial, that he was in no way letting her do so, gave her the clue that she needed to tread carefully. It was in line with his behavior pattern. He held her to her words, that, she had said she would be going for half a day and she was supposed to return home with him that day itself... Arnav paused, realizing he sounded too agitated about something that should not be made a big deal about but it affecting him very much. Khushi tried to reason out with him saying that, she was just two km away from his house, not in another city. She would be staying with her family, not strangers. And all she was telling was that it was for two days. Khushi's reasonable approach and explanation was a wasted effort, for all he could hear in his near panic state was she being away. The waves of panic that hit him were huge just like the tidal waves caused during tsunami, engulfing him and giving rise to the familiar panic pattern of being deserted and the loneliness it accompanied. He felt deserted just like the time, when his mother whom he was very much attached to, took her life leaving him alone. Squashing the rising panic within him, he in a decisive ASR tone sounded out that it was not possible and he wanted her back in RM that day itself. Having stayed with him, with a bit of his attitude rubbed on her, his decree made her set for a clash with him. Mrs. ASR with her nose high up in the air, asserted herself and countered, what if she does not? His menacing growl, that he will make her pay and no one messes with ASR, elicited a quick response, is that so? Then let her be the one to break the news to him that no one messes with Mrs. ASR too, and in a fit of pique cut her call. Taken unawares, all Arnav could do was glare at the phone in his hand, all worked up, fuming with the ire of the man who has lots to say but no one to listen.
In the evening, when it was time for her Arnavji to leave his office, Khushi looked nervously at the phone. She was with mixed feelings. One minute she was a bundle of nerves thinking, what would he do, drag her back to RM? Should she call him? Appease him? The very next she would be annoyed and determined not to buckle down. She would think how dare he order her around? Was she HP? Or Amanji? She would dig in her heels thinking no, she was his wife. Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada. No one would be able to push her around, not even her Arnavji. She drew in a deep breath and prayed to Devi Maiyya for courage to fight, tooth and nail if necessary, to be able to make her stand clear even if she had to go the extra mile. While her mind was debating on it, she heard Buaji calling out to her and ask, whether she was sure that she wanted to stay over for two days? When Khushi affirmed, Buaji was a bit taken aback to know that she was leaving her Arnav Babua alone in RM. She posed a query, who would take care of him there if she was here, for was she not responsible for his well being? Hearing it, Khushi fumed. She who was at her tethers end told Buaji that her Arnav Babua was old enough to take care of himself. If she was not aware, here was a piece of information that, he had been taking care of himself for the past 28 years without any help from her. And he has a house full of family there. He could not be alone even if he tried. The elderly lady was perceptive enough to know that they must have had a lover's tiff and exclaimed, so it was because of the spat, she wanted to stay over for two days, was it not? Buaji's exclamation, with her eyes wide, rolling around like a wheels of a chariot, as though it was her eureka moment, had Garima chuckle behind her hand and Babuji smile. Khushi's unladylike, Hhmmmpppfff! that made her view clear as she left, amused her family. She was cheesed off seeing that her family managed to get a rise out of her, went to her room and locked the door in a huff.
A few minutes later, knocking at her door, Garima called out to Khushi to open the door. Swiping the tears with the back of her hand she opened the door to see her Amma there, holding a tray with two cups of tea and a bowl of snacks in her hands. The sight before her made her frown and ask why she had to bring the tea there. She would have come out... her voice tapered out as she saw the person behind her Amma, making her gasp in a query, Arnavji? Arnav made his way into her room, wheeling a bag behind him. Khushi was so stunned to see him that she was left open-mouthed in disbelief! She wondered, what was going-on? Garima placed the tea tray on the table and turned to Arnav. She cupped his lean cheek in one palm and asked him to rest for a while and she would call when it was time for dinner. She asked Khussi to take care of Arnav Bitwaa and help him unpack and make space for his things in her cupboard and cabinets among all her hoarded junk. This strict admonition to Khushi to make her Damadji as comfortable as possible left Khushi staring in silence as her Amma left, closing the door after her. As Arnav locked the door and turned to look at a stupefied Khushi, he saw the telltale signs of tears that had been shed. He cupped her cheek and running a gentle finger down the curve, he asked, was she crying? What was the reason? Was it because he lost his temper? First, she nodded affirming and then, shook her head to mean a no, making Arnav smile at what he thought was her indecision and ask what exactly she means? Yes or no? She replied, both and she had cried, not because he was angry with her. When he shouts at her she does not feel like crying but gets the urge to respond with shouting back at him and she does. So that was fine by her. Her reply made him smile and think, that his employees should hear her. For they were sure to die of shock to hear her dismissing his anger as of no consequence when he had the ability to make grown men quiver in their boots and a mere look from him was enough to make them cry. He asked her in a tender loving voice, if not for his anger, then why was it she had shed tears? Her confession, with her eyes not meeting his, that it was what Buaji had said, she should have not left him alone in RM, made him feel a lump in his throat. She continued to say in a small voice that she had told Buaji that he would not be alone there, but... and paused. When Arnav prompted her to continue, Khushi looked away, for once lost for words.
Recognizing what her silence meant, it as a reaction with the knowledge that he would be lonely and had realized it after Buaji's talk, he confirmed her thoughts by whispered confession that, he was always lonely without her. Even in the middle of a crowd he would feel that loneliness if she was not by his side, making Khushi stare at him with her eyes like saucers. As he whispered his fingers deftly dealt with the buttons of his coat and the waistcoat and he continued saying, that was a fact known to all. When he reached home from office and told them that she was going to stay for two days, Nani scolded him for leaving her alone. Khushi was stunned to hear it. And with a smile he added that, Mami had told him that he should have stayed back with her and let his in-laws take care of him. He threw away the coat, waistcoat and tie, and slid two buttons of his shirt out of their buttonholes. Khushi who was taken aback hearing what he had to say, asked him in confirmation whether Naniji and Mamiji asked him to come there? As he said yes, and with a smile explained, they can understand her need to spend some time with her family, and also they know how miserable he would be without her, a half smile, like the moonlight of laughter, dawned on her face. Arnav cut a joke that, HP was one happy person and was in such a hurry to pack him off that he ran to keep Arnav's bag in the car. HP had not wanted him shouting or breaking things that he would resort to do if he were alone in RM. It brought out full bloom smiles on her rosy lips with soft laughter as just like the ripples on the sea. Khushi rushing to her husband threw her arms around him and whispered against his neck that, she was so glad that he had come, burrowing closer to him she confessed that, as soon as she had finished fighting with him, she had started to miss him. His, good, against her cheek as his lips moved towards hers and his arms gathering her as close as they could, made her query, what did his good mean? As she gazed at his eyes seeking answer, he said, very good, in appreciation of her angling her face just the way he wanted as he captured her startled lips with his eager ones. His motto, don't talk just act, don't say just show; don't promise just prove, for action speak louder than words were very effective in stopping her from asking anymore questions. Not that Khushi had anymore to ask for she felt words were vastly overrated and any day action was better, much better and her Arnavji knew only the best.
That is why it is titled ACTION.
"Desires dictate our priorities, priorities shape our choices, and choices determine our actions"
~ Dallin H. Oaks
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
Part 16
After a
laughter-filled dinner, Khushi dragged the cot to the yard, and sat there with
Arnavji, looking at the stars.
Arnav
looked around. There was no one on the road. Street lights shed dim light on
the tubewell and his car parked in Happyji’s garage.
“Khushi,
remember the bath you gave me?” he asked, laughter lurking in his eyes.
She looked
at him with wide eyes. “Bath?”
“At the
tubewell, in the presence of many ladies.” laughed Arnav.
Khushi’s
face reflected the rush of memories in to her mind. She smiled and looked away,
blushing.
Arnav
caught hold of her hand and threaded his fingers through hers.
“I am
sorry, Arnavji.” Khushi whispered. “You took offence, didn’t you? I was so angry
with you that…”
“It is OK,
Khushi. I deserved that and more.” Arnav admitted.
They sat in
the cool night air, holding hands, huddled together.
The stars
shone bright over their happy and content heads.
Arnav
wielded the mosquito mat expertly, massacring the pesky bloodsuckers lurking in
their bedroom.
Khushi came
in and shut the door.
“Shall we
go to bed, Arnavji?” she asked.
“I will
switch on the AC.” Arnav said, and went to do the needful.
Khushi
straightened the pillows. Then she took a sheet, folded it many times, and
placed it down the bed in a line to divide the bed in to two, his and hers.
Arnav
looked at the sheet with shocked eyes. “Khushi, what is this?”
“The
Raizada Rekha, also known as Arnav Rekha.” Khushi smiled cheekily.
“Khushi!”
“My Pati
Parmeshwar is always scared that I might pounce on him in my sleep and do
badtameezi with him.” Khushi explained, batting her lashes, trying to look all
innocent. “So he places this rekha to warn me not to cross over…”
Arnav did
not let Khushi complete her teasing. He grabbed and threw the sheet away.
He swept
her in to his arms and carried her to bed, his arms a safe cradle for her. He
laid her gently on the bed, and lowered himself to lie beside her, leaning over
her to study her lovely face in close up.
“But I have
a wife who, despite all my precautions, crawls all over me at night…” he
whispered.
Khushi
pouted.
“She sleeps
in taekwondo poses all night, wrestles with the covers, coils her legs around
me, climbs all over me, and holds me by my collar…” he teased, his eyes burning
in to hers.
Khushi went
all rosy.
“She fears
that I will fly away out through the window if she lets go of me.” he smirked,
his eyes on her pouting lips.
Khushi
growled, “Who was the one who said that he hated to share a room with me?”
“Who was
it?” Arnav asked, all innocent. “He must have been a fool.”
“Ji. He was
a fool. An arrogant fool full of ghussa, full of nafrat…” Khushi made her
opinion of him clear.
“And full
of love for you. More love than he knew what to do with. Love that just wouldn’t
die whatever happened. Love that could not be forgotten, killed, or ignored. Love that made spending each night with you in one room a fine torture.” He
peppered the words with sweet kisses on her lips. His voice went all soft and
husky, and Khushi moaned.
“Kya hua,
Khushi?” he asked, his wicked eyes smiling at her.
“Nothing.”
Khushi tried to be composed and dignified.
“Nothing?
That’s OK then. Good night.” He turned away, pretending to go to sleep.
Khushi
stared at him, her mouth wide open in an Awww.
She lay
waiting, hoping that he would gather her in to his arms and make sweet love all
night. One second passed. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six….
She looked at
him.
“Arnavji!”
she called softly, fed up of waiting.
There was
no movement. He lay still. Only a smile on his lips betrayed his devilry.
“Hhmmmpppffff!”
Khushi fumed. She turned away and lay facing the door.
One, two,
three, four… Her heart beat matched the ticking of the clock.
Slowly, his
hand came to rest on her shoulder. Khushi tried to shrug it off. He held firm.
His fingers
trailed down her arm, scorching the skin it touched.
Khushi
shuddered in helpless pleasure.
His fingers
moved up her arm, her shoulder, and to her nape. They expertly undid the hook
and pulled the zip of her suit down to her waist.
Khushi
trembled, shivering as though she had contracted fever.
Silently,
his gentle fingers smoothed the suit away from her shoulders.
Khushi
shut her eyes tight.
He caught
hold of her shoulder and gently turned her to lie on her back. He looked down
in to her dazed eyes with needy, passionate, hot eyes.
“Your eyes
tell me everything you feel, Khushi. I don’t need your words.” he whispered as
he demonstrated the good use she could put her silent lips to.
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Part 16.
This update is about private conversation between two persons, tete-a-tete.
After the laughter-filled dinner that was part of the simple and laid-back life of the Guptas', Khushi dragged the charpoy to the open yard and sat with her Arnavji watching the stars. It was a pleasant night and as Arnav looked around he found the streets deserted. The dim glow of the streetlights was falling on the hand pump and his car, parked in Happyji's garage. Arnav, reminiscing the time Khushi made him bathe outside in full view of the public, in a voice that was filled with mirth he asked her, whether she remembers the bath she gave him? Not comprehending what he meant or that it was light teasing banter, with her eyes wide open she parroted, bath? Wondering when she had given him one. As Arnav laughed and told her at the hand pump, in full vision of the ladies present there to collect water, Khushi's cheeks were suffused with colours, with the memories of her actions when she had pulled a fast one on him. Arnav caught hold of her hand and entwined his fingers with hers. This conversation reminded her how she had tried her utmost to break his will power in her home turf as a way of getting back at him. Khushi whispered that she was sorry for putting him through that drill and asked, he had taken offence, had he not? She had been so angry at him that... Khushi was not allowed to complete her sentence by Arnav admitting, that it was fine, for he deserved that and much more for all that he had put her through and what she did amounted to nothing in comparison. They sat inhaling the cool night air in a companionable silence, each savoring the presence of the other with their hands held in a warm clasp and enjoying the joys of huddling together. The stars were sparkling bright over them as they felt happiness and contentment wash over them.
Arnav took care of the pesky mosquitoes, swatting them with the racket, an attack that caused absolute carnage, bringing expertly their untimely demise. Khushi came in and shut the door; she asked him whether they could go to bed. Arnav told her that he would switch on the AC that would not only cool the room but also keep mosquitoes at bay and went on to do so. Khushi getting the bed readied, pumped the pillows soft. She took a sheet and folded it lengthwise into a long narrow strip and placed it at the centre as a divider, marking the space, his and hers. Arnav looked at the bed with shocked eyes and asked her what was that! Khushi's cheeky riposte, that it was the Raizada Rekha aka Arnav Rekha, had Arnav exclaim, Khushi, in exasperation. Khushi trying to look disarmingly innocent, beguilingly explained to Arnav that her Pati Parmeshwar is always scared with the thought that she might pounce on him in her sleep and subject him to her insolent and ill-mannered behavior. So to save himself from such ignominy, he places this rekha to warn her not to cross over... Her saucy teasing remark was not allowed to be completed by Arnav. He grabbed the sheet and flung it aside. In a quick move, sweeping her off her feet, unmindful of her natter, he had her ensconced in his arms and carried her to bed. He held her delicately as though she was fragile and extremely precious. Lowering her gently on the bed, he slid in besides her resting on his one arm he leaned over her, to study her lovely face in great detail. As he whispered that he has a lovely wife who despite all the precautions that he takes, makes it a point to crawl over him at night, Khushi pouted in defiance. Though his words were chin music, teasing her with objections, that she sleeps in taekwondo poses all night, wrestles with the covers, winds her legs around him, climbs all over him, and grips him by his collar, his eyes were telling a different story altogether. They were engaged in backchat sending scorching heat in to hers like pulsars, making her cheeks glow red as tomatoes. He continued to say that, she fears he would fly away, out through the window if she lets go of him. As he smirked, his eyes were glued on her pouting lips. An irate Khushi not liking to be at the receiving end all the time, growled who was it who said that he hated to share a room with her? Arnav, pretending to be unaware asked her, who was it who said so? That one must have been a fool. Khushi making her opinion on the matter clear, endorsed, that the person was indeed a fool, an arrogant fool, full of anger, full of hatred. Arnav peppering his words with lots of sweet kisses on her lips said, that the fool was also full of love, more love than he knew what to do with. He was filled with, love that just would not die whatever happened, love that could not be forgotten, killed, or ignored. That very love had made, spending each night with her in the same room, a refined self inflicted torture.
His loving ministrations to her lips, along with the soft and husky voice were making wondrous things inside her, shooting frissons of thrills and making her moan. With a tint of wicked glint dancing in his laughing eyes he asked, what happened, Khushi? Khushi trying not to break her composure, and act dignified told him, nothing. He repeated nothing? Then, it was fine and it was time to turn in. Wishing her good night, he turned away pretending to go to sleep. Khushi stared at him, her mouth wide open with shocking disbelief. She lay waiting for him to turn around, hoping he would gather her in his arms and make her forget everything but him and his love all through the night. She could hear the ticking of seconds. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six... Seeing no movement from him, she could not withstand the distance, she called softly, Arnavji! She attempted to parley but he was dumb to it. There was no response for he lay still. The only indication of his devilry was the triumphant smile, that he could not resist showing out, hearing the pleading note in her voice. It served only to fuel her anger that was all ready to be kindled with just a soft strike. She was miffed by his attitude as she relished these pillow talks when she had his undivided time and attention in the confines of their room, their very own Eden. She reveled in the rapport and intimacy, being close emotionally and physically as it helped both to have their ego stroked by the other who loves you and wants to be with you. With an ungainly, Hhmmmpppfff! Khushi fumed and turned away to face the door.
Her heart beat went tick tock, tick tock in tandem with the clock as she counted one, two, three, four... Slowly his hand came to rest on her shoulder and as Khushi tried to shrug it off, he held her firm. His fingers trailed down her arm intimately leaving a trail of shivers and tremors, heating the skin it touched. Khushi was filled with helpless pleasure as his fingers moved up her arm, her shoulder, and to her nape that made her feel floating on the soft clouds. His dexterous fingers expertly undid the hook and pulled the zip of her kameez down to her waist. Heat seared up her body as his hot gaze drifted across her. Silently, his gentle fingers eased the kameez off her shoulders, making her shut her eyes tight. He caught hold of her shoulder and gently made her to flip on to her back. He looked down in to her hazel dazed eyes that had golden speckles reflecting his needy, passionate, hot eyes. He whispered his view that, he does not need her words, for her eyes tell him everything she feels, and went on to demonstrate the usefulness of her silent lips, kissing her into oblivion. It was a statement that said, the mouth was made for communication and nothing was more articulate than a kiss.
That is why it is titled, tete-a-tete.
"The best things in life can never be kept; they must be given away. A smile, a Kiss and Love"
~ Tony Farrar
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
Part 17
It was
Diwali.
Arnav and
Khushi were very busy, Arnav trying to finish his work early to return home to
join the festivities, and Khushi running after the caterers and the decorators
to get the house all decked up and gorgeous by the time the guests arrived.
The
diyas she had made had dried just fine and they were stacked in trays, ready to
be lit. She ran from one part of the house to the next, making sure that
everything was done and ready by evening.
Finally, it was evening.
Arnav &
Akash walked in to the house, and saw Nani, Payal, Di, &
Mami in the hall, all busy decorating the room and Devi Maiyya’s idol for the
evening pooja and festivities.
Khushi alone was absent.
Leaving Akash to join
the family, Arnav walked away in search of his wife.
He found
her in a corner, sitting alone by a huge rangoli design. She was in an ordinary
purple suit, her hair plaited, filling colour in the design. Her face was a
picture of focus and concentration as she sieved the colours evenly. As he
watched, she finished her work. She heaved a sigh of relief and stretched her
back.
Arnav
smiled and took an eager step towards her, but the smile died away and his feet
halted at the look on her face in an unguarded moment.
She looked lost, scared
as she looked around the dimly-lit hall, seeing images of last Diwali – the guests
milling around, her red sari which had actually been meant for Lavanyaji, the
sugar-free sweets she had made for Arnavji that she had fed him while
congratulating him on his decision to get engaged to Lavanyaji, the abyss of
pain she had sunk into as he had held Lavanyaji close to him and looked at her
with triumph in his eyes as she stood by the pool, devastated, left alone
again, rudderless, abandoned, pain feeding on her mercilessly as she had
submitted to a ruthless fate and a cruel man who had played with her feelings
and humiliated and hurt her no end....
Arnav
swallowed hard, cursing himself and his thoughtlessness last Diwali. He had
behaved badly, hurt Khushi first and then Lavanya for no fault of theirs. His
cowardice, his prejudice, and his blindness had set all three of them on the
path to destruction. If only he had given in to his love for Khushi, admitted
his love for her atleast to himself… he could have spared all three of them
much anguish.
Khushi
sighed, feeling herself tremble after her short visit to the horrendous past. She
had pushed the memories under the carpet for months, suppressing them each time
they came to the fore. But today, they were proving very hard to control, very
adamant in raising their heads to destroy her peace....
Khushi shut her eyes tight. Arnav stood still watching
her, his heart in his mouth.
It was over, she told herself, clenching her
coloured fingers together. Over. Finished. Arnavji had changed. He loved her
now and he was her husband. Lavanyaji was settled in London now and hopefully
she was happy.
Last Diwali was in the past, a nightmare that
had to be forgotten if she had to go on. They had a new life together, new
experiences to share, many joys waiting in the wings….
Khushi looked around. Everything was ready for
the pooja and the guests invited to the evening’s function. Now all she had to do was
shower and dress. Arnavji would return from office soon, and she had to present
a cheerful face to him, somehow. She had to get through this night, somehow.
Arnav
watched her as she stood up, gathered the paraphernalia needed for making the
rangoli design, and walked to the kitchen to hand them over to HP to discard or
store as he saw fit. She took the diya and began lighting them all over the
hall.
“Khussi
bitiyaa! Yahan aayiye! See if Devi Maiyya’s idol looks good!” Nani invited her,
beaming.
Arnav
watched her paste a smile on her face as she walked up to Nani, inspected the
idol with great seriousness, and hugged Nani, praising her for her efforts.
“Aap theek
to ho?” Nani asked. “Your face looks pale.”
Khushi
smiled. “Woh, I have been running around all day, Naniji. I am slightly tired.”
Mami said, “Hello
Hi Bye Bye! We can’t have our Raijjada bahuriya tired. Take a beauty issleep
before pooja…” she advised. She leaned towards Khushi and whispered, “…just
like your Mami!”
Khushi
smiled, nodded, and turned to walk up the steps, not seeing Arnav standing in
the dimly-lit corner.
Khushi came
out of the bathroom after her shower to see Arnavji lying on their bed, his
arms crossed beneath his head, looking meditatively at the ceiling.
“Aap? When
did you come home? I didn’t see you!” Khushi trilled after a moment of shocked
silence. She had hoped for a moment's respite, but....
Arnav
turned his eyes to rest on her animated face.
“What are
you wearing tonight, Khushi?” he asked softly.
“Ji… Di gave
me a sari last week…” her voice died away.
He continued to look at her
silently, prompting her to add, “It is beautiful, with a lot of stones and
beads…”
Arnav
looked at her, waiting.
Khushi
averted her eyes and quickly turned to the wardrobe to pull out a gaily-wrapped
packet. She unwrapped it and showed it to Arnav.
It was a
beautiful sari, with elaborate work done along its borders and body. It was
bright blue in colour, as far from her red of the previous Diwali as possible.
Not wanting
him to comment on the sari or suggest that she exchange it for a red one, Khushi
jumped in, “Did you have your tea, Arnavji?”
“No.”
“I will
make it and bring it up. Why don’t you get changed? We have just one hour
before the guests arrive.” Khushi smiled as she rushed out of the room, away
from his all-seeing eyes.
She
returned with his tea to find the bedroom empty of his presence. Khushi stood
looking around the bedroom. Arnavji was missing.
She looked
at the tea and the snacks she had brought for him. Where was he?
Her eyes
fell on the red sari on the bed. She paled. She had placed a blue sari there.
How had it become red?
Khushi
placed the tray on the low table and walked to the bed on unsteady legs. She
sat down and touched the folds of the sari with trembling fingers. Red. Bright
red like the blood flowing through her veins, red like the blood her heart had
wept last Diwali…
Someone switched on the fairylights decorating the entire
house. The poolside lit up in the brilliance of a thousand tiny, bud-like bulbs. The red sari
held in her fingers took on a depth of hue and grandeur that was fascinating to
her like a snake to a mouse it had cornered and was going to swallow whole.
“Khushi…”
came the soft call.
Khushi
turned around to look at Arnavji standing near the door to the poolside.
“Liked the
sari?” his gravelly voice was huskier than usual.
Khushi
couldn’t find words to express her anguish at his choice or the heart to
disappoint him. She just nodded, lowering her lashes to veil her eyes.
“I love you
in red, Khushi.” His tone was low, as though he were making a promise, as though
he were whispering of his love for her in her ears.
“I will
wear it.” Khushi murmured as she escaped to the bathroom to change.
When she
returned, there were two jewellery boxes on the bed. She opened them to find a diamond
and ruby necklace, a pair of earrings, and bangles.... She looked around for
Arnavji, but he had apparently gone down. She wore them, and went to join the
family.
The house
looked beautiful, as it had done on Diwali a year back. Lights and diya, chains
and garland of colourful, fragrant flowers, and the rich clothes of all
the Raizada ladies added to the grandeur of the evening. The family members were
dressed to the nines and were welcoming the guests.
The Guptas
alone were not present. Garima and Buaji had taken Babuji to an Ayurveda
hospital for a week’s treatment.
Khushi
looked around for her husband. Arnavji was standing with Akash Jiju and Nanheji
at the entrance, greeting colleagues.
He looked
around, feeling Khushi’s presence. For a moment, he forgot to breathe. She
looked beautiful, like a pari in red, like a dream, like a blessing, the folds
of her sari clinging lovingly to the full lines of her figure, his mother’s necklace,
earrings, and bangles adorning her captivating form. Her silky hair was left
unbound just as he preferred it.
She was
smiling at Payal. Only the fear and uncertainty in her eyes betrayed her
uneasiness.
“Khushi…”
he held out his hand.
Khushi
smiled at him, her face slightly pale. She walked up to him and placed her hand
in his. He could feel her fingers trembling. He held on to them, tight. He had
to lay many a ghost tonight.
Guests
began to stream in by then, in large numbers.
Arnav made it a point to
introduce Khushi as his wife to everyone, putting his arm around her shoulders
or holding her arm as and when he could. Some of the ladies looked her up and
down, and went away smirking.
A while
later, three ladies came up to Khushi.
“You are
Khushi, the Raizada bahu, aren’t you?” Mrs. Dubey asked. She raised one exaggeratedly
arched eyebrow in question.
“Ji.”
Khushi tried to smile.
“Can you
get us something to drink?” asked Mrs. Mishra. “It is a very hot evening.” The
plump lady fanned herself with her fingers, her maincured nails flashing.
“Ji.”
Khushi moved to the tables set against the wall, set three long glasses of
chilled orange juice on a silver tray, and turned to serve the guests.
“Thank you.”
murmured Mrs. Rastogi. She took a deep drink, and said ruminatively, “I have
seen you before, somewhere...” Her big, cold eyes raked up and down Khushi’s
form.
“You may
have.” Mrs. Dubey said, a malicious smile twisting her lips. “She used to be a
servant here, before she managed to snare the son of the house.”
Khushi
paled.
“Last
Diwali, “ Mrs. Mishra informed the other two, “Arnav Singh Raizada was all set
to marry a girl from London. His girlfriend. He announced their decision to
marry at the party.” The lady smiled, showing her teeth. “But wonder of
wonders, this Diwali, the London girl is nowhere to be seen, and in her place
is this low-class waif who has made it good.”
Mrs. Dubey
added, “You must let us in to the secret of your success, Khushi.” She smiled,
her eyes glinting in pleasure at the pain on Khushi’s face. “After all, it can’t
have been easy to move up the ladder from beggar and maid to the mistress of
the house.”
“Shut up!”
hissed the lion. “You are my Nani’s guests. But that does not give you the
right to insult or hurt my wife. If you cannot keep a civil tongue in your
head, then it is high time you left.”
Mami, Di,
& Nani joined them. Khushi stood in their midst, feeling her limbs tremble.
“Kaa hua,
Chotey?” Nani asked.
“Nothing
much, Devyaniji. Your grandson was just asking us to leave.” Mrs. Dubey said.
Nani, Mami,
& Di stared at Arnav.
“They were
badmouthing Khushi…” Arnav explained to his family. “No one insults my wife and
gets away with it.” he stated, his eyes burning in fury.
“Badmouthing?”
Mrs. Mishra asked. “How can speaking the truth be called badmouthing?”
“We were
just asking your new bahu how she changed her status from maid to malkin here.
That’s all. Oh, and how she took the place of your Arnav’s girlfriend from London
after he announced his plans to marry her last Diwali at a similar party. How
can you call that badmouthing Khushi?” Mrs. Rastogi asked.
Mami fumed.
“You don’t have to borry (worry) about hamre Arnav Bitwaa’s girlfriend or his
wife. We are here to do it, Hello Hi Bye Bye!”
“Chotey is
right to chide you. Kindly leave our house if you can’t be polite to our bahu.”
Nani’s eyes were colder than ice, her voice firm.
“Khushiji
is our Chotey’s wife, and we are proud of her. You don’t have to concern
yourselves with her antecedents or our Chotey’s past.” Anjali’s eyes shot fire
at the three ladies.
Mami &
Nani nodded their support.
“And you
will never understand how she won Chotey’s heart. Because you are not capable
of seeing goodness and kindness in others.” Nani declared.
“What if I
started to asks after your sons and daughters, hein?” Mami asked, an evil look
on her face. “You won’t finds a place to cover your face. So leave our house,
you walking-talking vendors of gossip.”
The three
ladies walked off in a huff.
“Khussi
bitiyaa, you ignore such nonsense. It is just their jealousy talking. Come with
us. It is time for the pooja.” Nani led her away. Arnav followed hoping to get
a moment alone with his wife, but was doomed to disappointment.
Arnav sat
beside Khushi for the pooja. He looked sideways at her. Her eyes were on the
havan, her hands folded in prayer. Her body was by him, but her mind and her
thoughts were far away, in some unpleasant place in the past...
Arnav
swallowed in pain.
As he
watched, her lashes fell over her eyes, and she sat praying.
After the
pooja, Khushi was given a plate of prasad and asked to distribute it among the
guests. She offered a laddoo to Nani, Mami, Akash Jiju, Jiji, Di… Then she came
to Arnavji.
She took a
piece of a laddoo and held it out to him. She expected him to hold out his hand
for it, but he parted his lips instead.
Khushi
gulped, and slowly placed the tidbit in his mouth, feeling a hundred eyes
watching them.
Arnav
leaned forward and kissed her on her cheek in gratitude. Khushi gaped at him.
The crowd
of guests stared at them.
In shock, the
laddoo she had placed in her mouth went down the wrong passage, and Mami choked.
It took the concerted efforts of her son & daughter-in-law to bring her
back to normal.
“Khushiji,
will you check on the diyas? Some of them may be dying out for lack of oil.”
Anjali pleaded nicely.
“Ji.”
Khushi smiled politely, and went on to do as requested. She went through the
hall, her sharp eyes not missing a single diya. She checked the stairs and went
to the poolside. A diya was dying out for lack of oil. Khushi quickly bent down
and poured oil in to its cup, watching the flame revive.
She stood
up, capped the oil bottle, and turned around to see Arnavji standing by her.
“Arnavji!”
she whispered in shock.
“I am
sorry, Khushi.” he said softly.
She looked at
him, silent.
“Sorry for
subjecting you to such insults. Sorry for hurting you now and last Diwali.
Sorry for not having the guts to face my love for you last year. Sorry for
messing up your life and playing with Lavanya’s feelings last year. I…I don’t
know what I was thinking, Khushi. I was in such a hurry to run away from my
feelings for you that I ended up committing one mistake after the other.” His voice
was slow, but sincere.
Khushi
looked away.
“I have
done many terrible things to you, Khushi. Insulted you, hurt you physically,
wounded you with my tongue… but Diwali night was the worst. The worst. Worse
than the night I forced you to marry me….because when we got married, atleast I
was with you. We were together in the misery. On Diwali night, I…I …”
Khushi's head remained firmly turned away.
Arnav cupped
her face and made her look at him. “It is no consolation, but know that when I hurt you, my heart was torn to strips. Every tear of yours fell like acid on my heart. I couldn’t
sleep at nights, seeing you look at me with wounded eyes through the glass window…”
Khushi
lowered her eyes.
“The full
realisation of the pickle I had gotten myself in to came when people started
congratulating me for an engagement I had never wanted to or planned to get in
to, when Lavanya was hugging me, and the one I wanted, you, were turning to
leave me and go out of my life.”
Khushi lowered her lashes to shut him out.
He sighed. “Khushi,
look at me. Please.”
Khushi
lifted her lashes.
“I will
never forget the last look you gave me, the look that said, now you have gotten
what you wanted, haven’t you? Are you happy now? I knew the answer at that
moment. I knew that I had made a mistake of mammoth proportions, driven by my
panic. But it was too late to backtrack. Too late.” he confessed.
They stood silent among the burning diyas. The sound of fireworks fille dthe air.
“Don’t give
me anymore red saris. I hate the sight of them.” Khushi said.
“I won’t.”
Arnav promised, a lump in his throat.
“I burnt
the one I wore last Diwali. I will burn this one too.” Khushi threatened him.
“Burn it. Look
through Di, Mami, & Payal’s wardrobes too, and burn every red cloth you can
find. Hell, burn the whole house down if you want to.” he invited her.
A small
smile appeared on Khushi’s lips.
“I won’t
make anymore diya for Diwali.” Khushi stated.
“You won’t
come to my garden to steal mitti anymore?” he asked, disappointment rife in his
voice.
“No.”
Khushi declared.
Arnav
sighed, “OK.”
“I won’t
light diya around your pool.” Khushi threatened him.
“Oh! Khushi,
they look so nice…” His voice died away under her militant eye. “OK.” he said,
defeated.
“Every
Diwali, I will go to Buaji’s house. You can sit here listening to witches
bitching about me, and I will burst crackers and eat jalebi with my bacha
party.” Khushi declared.
“No, Khushi.
I want to spend Diwali with you. Take me with you.” he requested.
“Let me think
about it.” Khushi pretended to ponder on the issue.
“Khushi…”
Arnav put his hand in to his pocket. “Here’s your gift for Diwali.” He pulled
out a small jewellery box and handed it to her.
Khushi
opened it. It held a beautiful diamond necklace, the stones sparkling fire in
the dim light.
“Shukriya,
Arnavji.” Khushi whispered, kissing him on his lean cheek, caressing his
stubble with her soft lips.
“I know you
prefer jalebis to diamonds. There is a box of them waiting for you on our bed.
From Chagganlal Mittaiwala.” he whispered against her cheek.
Khushi almost
jumped up and down in joy. “Arnavji! Thank you, thank you!”
Arnav looked
at her smiling lips. “Where is my gift, Khushi?” he lowered his head to steal a
kiss, but Khushi moved back.
“One
minute, Arnavji.” she said as she vanished in to their bedroom. She returned
with a white cover which she handed over to him.
Arnav frowned
at her as he flipped it open. Inside was a single sheet of paper. From a lab!
"Khushi!" Arnav gasped. "Are you sick? Why didn't you tell me?" he panicked.
"Arnavji! Read the whole thing before you scold me." Khushi pouted.
Khushi Kumari
Gupta Singh Raizada had been tested for pregnancy, and the result was... Positive!
Arnav
stared at the paper and then at Khushi’s face. He then looked at the writing on
the paper carefully again. Maybe he had misread it…
“Offo!
Arnavji, you are so slow! If it were Salman Khanji in your place, he would have
lifted his wife in his arms and swung her around…” Khushi teased him.
But Arnav
was beyond all teasing.
“Khushi…
Khushi… we are going to have… a baby?” he asked. "Really have a ... baby?"
“Ji. I
think it is a baby. It may be a jalebi for all I know…” Khushi smiled, laughing
at him.
Arnav
stared at the report once more. He folded it carefully and put it in his
pocket. He then lowered himself to his knees at her feet, and touched her tummy
with reverent fingers.
“Khushi,
our baby…” he said softly, as if scared of disturbing him or her.
“Ji.”
Khushi smiled.
“I will
take care of you. Make sure that nothing bad ever happens to you…” he promised the
unborn child, tears clogging his throat. “I will be a better father than mine
ever was to me.” He kissed her tummy repeatedly.
He buried
his face against the soft skin of her stomach. She could feel his tears against
her skin. She held him close for a long moment.
Then he
asked, “Khushi, how did you know?”
She
frowned. “It was the most amazing thing, Arnavji! Can you imagine me refusing
jalebi?”
Arnav shook
his head, a small smile on his face.
“Buaji made
jalebi for me, and the minute she opened the bin, I almost threw up. So I knew
there was something very wrong with me.” She was perfectly serious.
Arnav
stared at her in wonder.
“I went to
a general physician, and he sent me to a gynaecologist.” she smiled. “It is
then that I realised that the problem was not the jalebi but chotu-sa Arnav
Singh Raizada.”
“Khushi!” He
stood up and hugged her tight. Khushi burrowed in to his arms, feeling safe and
content. “Khushi, this is the best Diwali of my life.”
Khushi
smiled.
“And this
is the best Diwali gift you could ever give me.” He rained kisses on his wife’s
face and lips, punctuating the words with addictive kisses, some sweet as
honey, some hot as chilly.
“Arnavji,
promise me…” Khushi whispered, her face serious for a moment.
“Promise.” he
said.
“Promise me
that whatever happens in the future, whether good or bad, we will always be
together…”
“I promise.”
He scooped her up in his arms and carried her
to bed.
“Promise me
that even if we have an army of children, you will always love me the most.”
Khushi pouted.
“I promise.”
Arnav smiled against her lips. “You will always be my first and best Sanka
Devi.”
The End.
Thank you,
friends, for staying on this journey with us. The next story, Marrying Khushi,
will begin next week.
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Section 1 of Part 17.
This update is about defense or protection, BULWARK.
On the Diwali day Arnav and Khushi, both were very busy, with Arnav trying to wind up his work as quickly as possible to return home to join the festivities, his and Khushi's first Diwali together, and Khushi running after the caterers and the decorators to get the house all decked up to look gorgeous, with festoons of flowers, greens and fairy lights. The house needed to be all spruced up by the time the guests arrived. The diyas she had made had dried just fine and were hand-painted in glowing colors each colorful than the other that would bring in a colourful, lyrical, dramatic quality into a vast, unquenchable litany of lights when lit. They were stacked in trays, waiting to be lit. She ran from one part of the house to the next, making sure that everything was done and ready by evening. At RM she was the mainstay, moving quickly like the mercury looking into various things that needed to be done.
When it was the time for the festivities to begin, at dusk, Arnav and Akash entered in to the house, and saw Nani, Payal, Di and Mami in the hall, all immersed in giving the last minute touch to the already decorated room and Devi Maiyya's idol for the evening pooja and festivities. Arnav saw all the ladies of his family there sans Khushi. Leaving Akash to join the family, Arnav walked away in search of his wife. He found her in a corner, sitting all alone by a huge rangoli design. She looked extraordinarily beautiful to his eyes, in an ordinary purple suit with her hair plaited as not to hinder her in her work. Her face was a picture of focus and concentration as she sieved the colours evenly filling it into the design. As he watched, she finished her work and heaving a sigh of relief stretched her back. His face was filled with happiness to see her beautiful art of rangoli. Arnav eagerly smiling took an eager step towards her, but the smile died away and his feet halted at the look on her face in an unguarded moment. She looked lost, scared as she looked around the dimly-lit hall, for she was haunted by the images of last Diwali. In her mind's eye, she clearly saw the guests milling around, she in her red sari that was actually meant for Lavanyaji, the sugar-free sweets she had lovingly made for Arnavji, the very sweet with which she had fed him while congratulating him on his decision to get engaged to Lavanyaji, the abyss of pain she had sunk into as he had held Lavanyaji close to him and looked at her with a triumphant gleam in his eyes as she stood by the pool, her visage a picture of devastation, feeling like the lone survivor after the devastating typhoon, left alone again, adrift in a strange no-man zone, rudderless, abandoned, pain feeding on her mercilessly as she had submitted to a ruthless fate and a puppet in the hands of a cruel man who had played with her feelings and humiliated and all torn up inside. For her RM was like a fortress, that held both bitter as well as sweet memories, the memories that protected as well as had slayed her through.
Seeing the haunted and persecuted expression on Khushi, Arnav swallowed hard, cursing himself and his thoughtless behaviour at the time of the previous Diwali, which was purely despicable. He had behaved abominably selfish and then had stood tall making her congratulate him, lording over her hurt with a challenge thrown silently with his eyes. He had been under the misconception that he was safeguarding his heart and his deed on that day was a justifiable part of defense. He had hurt Khushi first and then Lavanya for no fault of theirs. His cowardice, his prejudice, and his blindness had set all three of them on the path to destruction. If only he had enough sense then to give in to his love for Khushi, acknowledged his love for her at least to himself, he could have spared all three of them much anguish rather than going through the whole rigmarole. But, he knew he cannot unring a bell.
Khushi heaved a sigh, feeling herself tremble after her short visit to the ghastly incidents and the harrowing past. She had pushed the memories under the carpet for months, suppressing them each time they came to the fore. But a year back on this day, the day when it was the festival of lights, that was meant as a celebration of the going from the tunnel of darkness to towards the light; she had plunged into darkness, for she could not find a source of light that could lead her out of the nebulous darkness that enveloped her. Amidst the circles of light all she could see was the shadow being cast that was sucking her into it. These bitter memories were proving very hard to control, were very adamant in raising their heads to destroy her peace. For her it was like standing on the parapet. One side it was the bitter memories of the past that were trying her to pull down into the precipice and on the other side, Arnavji's face and his care of the present pulling her towards his ocean of love. She knew where she wanted to be, in the present and not the past. Khushi shut her eye, as though she could shut them out with her eyes closed and willed herself to come out of those melancholic thoughts. Arnav stood watching her with his heart in his mouth. She pepped herself that it was over. Clenching her coloured fingers into a tight fist, as an outwork against the onslaught of these memories, she repeated to herself that it was over, it was a bad phase that will not visit her, it was finished. When she accepted Arnavji as her husband she had accepted his past too. She could not hold it against him. She could not judge him by his past record for he too was in the present just like her. She reminded herself that Arnavji had changed; he now loved her very much and was her husband. Lavanyaji was settled in London now and with Devi Maiyya's blessings hopefully she was leading a happy life. Last Diwali was in the past, a nightmare that had to be forgotten if she had to go on. She wondered why let the sadness of the past ruin the happiness of the present, why rake over the ashes when they now had a new life together, new experiences to share, many joys waiting in the wings. Khushi looked around. Everything was ready, for the pooja and the guests invited to the evening's function. Now all she had to do was shower and dress. Arnavji would return from office soon, and as a precaution against him coming to know of the feelings she was undergoing, she had to present a cheerful face to him, somehow, even if it meant that she had to dig on her reserves. She needed to get through this night, somehow.
Arnav watched her as she stood up, gathered the paraphernalia needed for making the rangoli design, and walked to the kitchen to hand them over to HP to stash away till the next Diwali or discard as he saw fit. Taking a diya she began lighting them all over the hall. As she was immersed in her work, she heard a beaming Nani, extremely happy with her handiwork, calling out to her to come over and check on the decorations she had done on the Devi Maiyya's idol. Arnav watched her give a wooden smile as she walked up to Nani, inspected the idol in great detail and hug Nani, praising her for her efforts. Nani seeing Khushi wan asked her, whether she was alright? She thought Khushi looked a bit pale. Khushi threw her off the track saying that, it was due to her feeling tired after all the running around throughout the day. The incorrigible Mami, who was particular about how they look, told her that they could not have a Raizada bahu looking wan and tired. She advised her in a loud whisper to take a nap before pooja just like her Mami does to look as fresh as a daisy when the guests arrive. For Khushi her family was the protection that would help her to withstand the assault of those bitter memories. Khushi giving her a smile nodded at her pearl of wisdom and turned to walk up the steps, not seeing Arnav standing in the shadows of the dimly-lit corner.
When Khushi came out of the bathroom after her shower, she saw her Arnavji lying on their bed, his arms crossed beneath his head, looking pensively at the ceiling as though he was mulling over some things that were distasteful. Khushi seeing him was utterly surprised and trilled, when did he come home? She had not even been aware of it! She had hoped for some moments of respite, to dwell on her thoughts all alone and set her mind into a good frame, erect her shield, to enable her to pass through the day filled with bitter unwanted memories. She did not want to treat herself as a victim of the past but as a confident survivor. She wanted to be able to tackle anything that was thrown at her but she needed those few moments to recover from the mental assault and school her face. But luck was not on her side. As she asked, Arnav turned his eyes to rest on her animated face and asked her softly, what was she wearing that night? She told him that Di had given her a sari last week and she was planning to wear it. As she told her voice faded away. His continued silence prompted her to add that, it was a beautiful piece embellished with lots of crystals and bead work. As Arnav looked at her silently, she skittered her gaze away from him, took out the packet and showed it to him. It was a beautiful sari, with elaborate work done along its borders and body, a vivid midnight blue, a colour from the other end of the spectrum, from her red of the previous Diwali. She was buttressing herself from the unwanted thoughts.
Not wanting him to comment on the sari or suggest that she exchange it for a red one, Khushi changing the topic asked him, whether he had his tea. Getting a negative in reply, she smiled and rushed out saying, that she will get it for him and in the meantime why not he change, as there was just an hour before the guests arrive. She hurried to be away from his all-seeing eyes, making the preparation of his tea as her shield. As she entered the bedroom with his tea, she found it to be empty. Khushi stood looking around and confirmed that he was not there. Looking at the tea and the nibbles she had brought for him she wondered, where he was. As her thoughtful gaze wandered around the room, it met with a sari laid on bed, her blanched face told a story of its own. She had decided on the blue sari as her redoubt, her stronghold, fortifying herself with it. She wondered how did the red sari turn up, when she had left the midnight blue one over there.
Placing the tray on the low table, Khushi walked to the bed on shaky legs and plonked down touching the folds of the sari with quivering fingers. The colour red, that too bright red just like the blood flowing through her veins, red like the blood her heart had wept last Diwali. As she was feeling the texture of the sari immersed in her unpalatable thoughts, the dusk had set in. As it was twilight the fairy lights were switched on that lit the entire house with its dainty lights making the mansion look like a bit of the Milky Way filled with red, yellow and blue stars. The pool side was lit up with the twinkling fairy lights, sparkling and shining, glistening on the leaves and flowers, lending a veneer of festivity. The red sari held in her fingers took on an intense hue and grandeur that was fascinating to her like a snake to a mesmerized mouse it had cornered and was going to swallow whole. While she was immersed in the sari, she heard a soft call, Khushi, from behind and as she turned, she saw Arnavji standing near the door to the poolside. His voice had gone gravelly and huskier than usual as he asked her, did she like the sari. His poser filled Khushi with terrible dilemma. She could not find words to express her anguish at his choice or have the heart to disappoint him with the truth of how she felt. Taking her usual route of suppressing her emotions and feelings, not wanting to disappoint him, seeking the strength and support from her belief, faith and trust in her love, she just nodded, lowering her lashes to hood her eyes.
In a low tone, as though he were making a promise, as though he were whispering of his love for her in her ears, he told her, that he loves her in red. Khushi, murmuring her assent to wear it, rushed into the bathroom to change. As she entered the room wearing the sari, there were two jewel boxes on the bed. She opened them to find a diamond and ruby necklace, a pair of earrings, and bangles that made brilliant accessories to the sari. The sari was in brilliant red with crystal bead work done like spiral chandeliers twinkling and glittering when the light fell on them, looking just like a strip of group of stars being placed on her sari. The choli at the back was like a crystal chandelier, the bright red making her fair skin glow. The accessories were just perfect. She looked around for Arnavji, but it looked as though he had gone down. She wore them, and went to join the family.
The house looked beautiful, as it had done on Diwali a year back. Lights and diya, colourful floral festoons emanating their fragrance and the grand dressing of all the Raizada ladies showing them as belonging to the opulent elite added to the charm and grandeur of the evening. The family members dressed to the nines were welcoming the guests. The Guptas' alone were not present, for it was the time scheduled for Babuji's treatment. Garima and Buaji had taken Babuji to the Ayurveda hospital for a week's treatment. As Khushi looked around her eyes seeking her husband, her guardian, she saw Arnavji standing with Akash Jiju and Nanheji at the entrance, greeting their colleagues. Feeling Khushi's presence and her eyes riveted on him, he looked around and seeing the vision in red, his breath hitched. She looked beautiful, just like a fairy in red, like a dream, like a blessing, the folds of her sari clinging lovingly to the full lines of her figure, his mother's necklace, earrings, and bangles adorning her enchanting figure. Her silky hair was left unbound just as he preferred it. Her smile added to her allure. She was smiling at Payal. Only the fear and uncertainty in her eyes betrayed her uneasiness. Sensing her emotional upheaval wanting to be her protector, calling out, Khushi..., he held out his hand. Khushi with a grateful smile on her slightly pale face walked up to him and placed her hand in his. He could feel her fingers trembling. He held on to them, tight knowing he had to lay many a ghost tonight.
As guests began to stream in large numbers, Arnav made it a point to introduce Khushi as his wife to everyone, putting his arm around her shoulders or holding her arm as and when he could. Some of the ladies gave her a quick once-over, and went away smirking. After a while, three ladies came up to Khushi, Mrs. Dubey, Mrs. Mishra and Mrs. Rastogi. Mrs. Dubey, raising her one eyebrow in an exaggerated arch queried, was she not the Raizada bahu, Khushi. When Khushi replied that, she was, with a smile, Mrs. Mishra asked her, can she get them something long and cool to drink as it was a very hot evening. The rotund lady fanned herself with her plump fingers, her painted nails flashing with its brilliant gaudy colour and her face faking a smile. Khushi moving to the tables set against the wall brought three long glasses of chilled orange juice on a silver tray, to serve the guests. With thanks, murmured, Mrs. Rastogi took a deep sip while eyeing Khushi speculatively she mused, that she had seen her somewhere before, looked quite familiar, just unable to place exactly where... Her big, cold eyes raked Khushi up and down as though she was looking at a horse in an auction before bidding for it. Mrs. Dubey spoke out feeding her the needed information that, she may have seen Khushi, for she used to be a maid there before she trapped the scion of the Raizadas'. Her malicious smile was twisting on her lips and the rest had an ugly sneer on their faces, at the remark while Khushi paled hearing it. Mrs. Mishra added her two bit saying that, last Diwali, Arnav Singh Raizada was all set to marry a girl from London, his girlfriend. He had announced their decision to marry at the party. But wonders never cease, for this Diwali, the London girl was nowhere in the picture, and in her place was this low-class waif who has made it good. The lady smiled, flashing her bleached teeth. Mrs. Dubey, addressing Khushi added that, she must let them in to the secret behind her success. After all, it would not have been easy to move up the ladder from being a street waif to being maid then to the position of mistress of the house, all within a span of a year. It would have involved intense machinations and they would love to acquire this valuable know-how. She smiled, her eyes glinting in pleasure at the pain on Khushi's face, for she thought the three had been successful in storming the citadel and churning things with their venomous sharp tongues.
But it was not to shine for long. Her smile froze hearing, an outraged, shut up, a hiss from clenched jaws of the Lion, the defender of his Pride and his territory. They were told that they were his Nani's guests, but that did not empower them to insult or hurt his wife. If they were incapable of being civil or having a civil thought in their head, then the only thing left for them to do was let themselves out through the open front door. The doors were wide open awaiting their exit. Seeing Arnav's face tightened with anger, annoyance and determination, Mami, Di, and Nani, Khushi's guardian angels' joined them. Khushi stood in their midst, feeling like a sacrificial lamb with her limbs quivering. Nani asked her grandson, what happened Chotey. But it was Mrs. Dubey who jumped in to answer saying, nothing much. It was just that her grandson was asking them to leave. As Nani, Mami and Di stared at Arnav, he explained to them that, the three were badmouthing Khushi... He stated that, no one insults his wife and gets away with it. His eyes were spitting fire, balls of fury. Mrs. Mishra offended by his usage of word asked, badmouthing? How can speaking the truth be called badmouthing? Mrs. Rastogi told that, they were just asking her new bahu how she changed her status from maid to malkin here. That's all and of course, how she usurped the place of Arnav's girlfriend from London after he announced his plans to marry her last Diwali at a similar party. How can that be termed as badmouthing Khushi? Mami who was listening to this fumed and told them without mincing words, that they do not have to worry about their Arnav Bitwaa's girlfriend or his wife. They were there to do it, and signed off her statement with a, Hello Hi Bye Bye! Nani with her eyes gone cold as icicles, and voice, firm and cutting as a sword, told them that, her Chotey was right to chide them. She asked them to kindly leave the house if they cannot be polite to her bahu. Anjali unequivocally told them that Khushiji is their Chotey's wife, and they were proud of her. They, the outsiders, need not have to concern themselves with her antecedents or their Chotey's past. Anjali's eyes were like rotary cannon launching an attack and shelling fire at the three ladies along with her words. Mami and Nani nodded their support. Nani declared that it was way too high for them to ever understand how she won Chotey's heart, because they were incapable of seeing goodness and kindness in others. Not one to be out beaten, Mami, with an evil look on her face asked them, what if she started to ask after their sons and daughters, and their deeds, for there were no barriers to stop her from carrying out her words. If ever that comes out, they will not be having a place to hide their face. So she asked them to leave the house, addressing them as, you walking-talking vendors of gossip. Arnav, Nani, Anjali and Mami stood as a solid bulwark against the malicious attack on Khushi. The three ladies, unable to withstand the assault, with humiliated ego, walked off in a huff. Nani called out to Khussi bitiyaa and asked her to ignore such nonsense. It was nothing but just their jealousy talking. She told Khushi that it was time for the pooja and led her away. Arnav followed hoping to get a moment alone with his wife, but it was just a wishful thinking on his part that was doomed for disappointment.
In this update Khushi herself erects certain shields to protect herself from the bitter thoughts and also protect Arnav from getting an inkling of her thoughts. Against the outsiders, Arnav, Nani, Anjali and Mami come to Khushi's defense and successfully do so. That is what family is all about, to be there when you need them the most. That is why it is titled BULWARK.
"This is part of what a family is about, not just love. It's knowing that your family will be there watching out for you. Nothing else will give you that. Not money. Not fame. Not work"
~ Mitch Albom, Tuesdays With Morrie
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
Smita,
Here is the interpretation for Section 2 of Part 17.
This update is about acceptance of something as true, in a word, CREDENCE.
As Arnav sat beside Khushi for the pooja, he looked sideways at her. Her eyes were on the havan, her hands folded in prayer piously. Though her body was by him, her mind and her thoughts were far away, wedged in some unpleasant place in the past. Arnav swallowed the bitter spit of pain. It was something he needed to accept as the bitter fruit of his actions that his wife would have to undergo all through their life and he would have to undergo looking at her pain. There was no escape from it. For he had realized that there was no way to stop the wave, but they needed only to learn how to surf it out. This understanding was his first step to acceptance and only then would there be any scope for recovery. As he watched, her lashes hooded over her eyes, hiding her pain filled eyes from the world in general, him in particular and she sat erect praying. After the pooja, Khushi, being the eldest bahu, was given the plate of prasad to distribute it among the guests. She offered a laddoo each to Nani, Mami, Akash Jiju, Jiji, Di... Then when she came to Arnavji, taking a laddoo she held it out to him. She expected him to hold out his hand for it, but he parted his lips instead. Khushi gulped, and slowly placed the tidbit in his mouth, feeling a hundred eyes watching them. Arnav leaned forward and kissed her on her cheek in gratitude, for gracing in his life despite his cruel ways, making Khushi gape at him and the crowd gathered, stare at them. Mami, who had placed the laddoo in her mouth choked as it went down the wrong passage, it took the concerted efforts of her son and daughter-in-law to bring her back to normal. This gesture of Arnav's gave credence to what the family was stating that Khushi was their Chotey's wife and she was not a street waif who had trapped Arnav. She was in fact the sole custodian of his heart. Arnav, who earlier was against display of any emotions related to love was now openly showing his affections towards his wife, that effectively shut any yentas still lingering in the guest crowd.
When Anjali in a sweet voice requested her whether she could check on the diyas and refill them with the oil if needed, Khushi smiled politely and went on to comply. Her eyes combed finely through the lamps lit in the hall, stairs and then went to the poolside. There a diya was giving out its flickering light just before it got doused. Khushi quickly bent down and poured oil in to its cup, watching the flame revive. She stood up, capped the oil bottle, and turned around, to see Arnavji standing by her. Her shocked whisper, Arnavji, seeing his contrite face, elicited an apology in a soft voice. As he said he was sorry, she looked at him silently. Having decided to speak his mind, in a sincere voice that had gone huskier and deeper with emotion came out his heartfelt apology. He slowly and succinctly reflected his honest thoughts that, he was sorry for subjecting her to such insults. He was sorry for hurting her, this as well as last Diwali. He was sorry for not being brave enough to face his love for her in the previous year and for putting her under the grill. He had not played fair and was sorry for messing up her life and also playing with Lavanya's feelings the previous year. And to set the records straight, his thoughts had been one big incomprehensible mess and really did not know what he was thinking. His mind had been hopelessly muddled, not really understanding himself, he had run away from his feelings as the concept of love was alien to his mind, something he had looked down upon and had never thought or dreamt that he too would fall in love. While being in the cusp of love unknowingly, he was in such a hurry to run away from his feelings for her that he ended up committing one mistake after the other and finally all it had amounted to was, heartache for both and humiliation to her. His acknowledgement to his erroneous thinking and admission of being a drowning swimmer flailing hands to keep afloat and really not aware that by doing so he was getting sucked into the whirlpool stronger did gain credence to his actions.
Hearing his words, Khushi looked away. Though she could empathize with him, his words did not assuage her wounded heart. Still she listened silently. Arnav pressing on with his unreserved abject apology with the belief, however bitter the truth was it would not vanish and it needed to be dealt told that, his list of errors and blunders were long. He had insulted her, hurt her physically, lacerated her with his tongue, but Diwali night was the worst. That was the zenith. It marked the apogee of his worst behavior, for it was worse than the night he had coerced her into marriage, because when they got married, at least he was with her. They were together in the misery. On Diwali night, he..., he paused unable to continue. But Khushi did not react. Her head remained firmly turned away. Arnav cupped her face and made her look at him and said that it was no consolation, but he had to let her know that when he hurt her, his heart was torn to strips. Every tear she had shed had corroded his heart like acid. After his emotionless cruel deed, he had been unable to sleep at nights, seeing her look at him with wounded eyes through the glass window, for they were etched in his memory. Her look of betrayal and the hurt had kept on piercing him and had put him on pins and needles. He had thought that it was easier to pretend that he did not care than admit that it was killing him and had carried on. Khushi lowered her eyes hearing it, knowing fully well she needed to hide the raw pain that evoked in her, with the revisit to the wound of the past. She knew if he saw it in full bloom in her eyes he was doomed, would never be able to get out of his remorse all their life. She realized though the bad memories had a habit to rerun, it was something she had to trust herself not to succumb to, for the sake of her love and her life, her Arnavji.
Arnav continued to say that the full realization of the pickle he had gotten in to, came to him when people started congratulating him for an engagement he had never wanted to or planned to get in to, when Lavanya was hugging him, while the one he wanted, she was turning to leave him and go out of his life. Khushi lowered her lashes to shut him out. With a sigh, he asked her to look at him, adding a beseeching, Khushi please. Compelled by his tone, Khushi obliged and lifted her lashes. He told her that he would never forget the last look she gave him, the look that said, now that you have gotten what you wanted, are you not happy now? Her silent query found its target and the answer he received from within him that very moment, made him stagger. He had realized that to escape from the heat of the pan he had plunged himself into the fire. He knew that he had made a mistake of mammoth proportions, driven by his panic. But it was too late to backtrack. His deed of panic had resounding repercussions. He had pushed her, his Khushi, away from him and whatever he did would bring misery to one or the other. They stood silent among the burning diyas. The sound of fireworks filled the air. His confession and apology only made her strong and made her to resolve, not to live in the past for she had already lived there, and be it with pain or with happiness. She knew just because past taps on the shoulder, it did not mean one has to look back. She needed to let go of the burdens of the past as one cannot change it. But she could go confidently in the direction of the future for that was where their dreams now lay, without forgetting what the past taught her. This acceptance of faith and trust in her love, in her Arnavji, in their life together helped her to gather her thoughts and brace herself to look at their future together.
With this firm resolve she asked him, not to give her anymore red saris admitting that she hates the very sight of them. They remind her of nothing but humiliation and the loss she felt. Arnav promised her that he won't, with a lump in his throat. She told him that the one she wore last Diwali was now a heap of ashes and she would burn this one too. Her threat to mingle it with cinders brought out an agreeable response, accepting her decision; he invited her to not only to burn this piece but also any red saris that Di, Mami and Payal possessed too. Any piece of red cloth she could lay her hands on too could go to the bonfire. If she prefers, she could put a burning stake to reduce the whole house into a bag of ashes. He gave her carte blanche to do as she pleases and he would support her to the hilt if it gave her any solace. His words uttered with confidence, asked her to repose her faith in him declaring that he was with her come what may. His words brought in a ghost of a smile on her lips. She was adamant when she said that she will not make any more diya for Diwali. It was a challenge for him to refute her defiance. When in a low voice rife with disappointment, he asked, won't she come stealthily to remove anymore clay soil from his garden; he received an answer with certainty ringing in it, that she would not. Arnav sighed in response and agreed. Her denial to light the diya around the pool though disappointed Arnav, one look at her militant eye made him give in to her demand. She continued with her list of what she wanted to do henceforth. She told him that, every Diwali, she will go to Buaji's house. He can be at RM listening to witches bitching about her, while she will be bursting crackers and eating jalebi with her children army. Arnav was not ready for this for it ran counter to his thoughts and made no bones about it. He told her that he wanted an amendment to this decision of hers, as he too wanted to celebrate Diwali with her; He requested to take him with her. Khushi who was glad to hear his words that gave her the much needed assurance, pretending to ponder on the issue said, that she would give it due consideration and let him know at a later date.
Arnav calling her out fished out a small jewel box from his pocket and handed it to her saying, that it was her Diwali gift from him. A delighted Khushi opened it wondering what it held. The box housed a beautiful diamond necklace that lay on its velvet bed. The stones were with perfect balance of cut, colour and clarity, sparkling fire in the dim light. The stray ray of light falling on it was making it twinkle as though beckoning her with a wink to slip it on to her neck. This was Arnav's way of giving credit to Khushi. It was his acceptance that he was like a rough diamond before her advent into his life and now he is able to sparkle with love with her polishing his soul with her brand of unconditional love. Taking a good look at the diamond set, Khushi had realized that the goal is to walk a path on which our souls will shine and sparkle as brightly as diamonds. On this path there will be many labyrinth turns just like the angles and facets of the diamond. But if we travel the path with honorable hearts, and if we are aware of the reflective nature of our lives, with our actions reflecting in our reality, we will accomplish our mission of reaching the light. Khushi touched by his gesture, whispering, thanks, kissed him on his lean cheek, caressing his stubble with her soft lips. Arnav, to his credit knowing what really gladdened her heart, whispered that, he knows that she prefers jalebis to diamonds and there was a box of them waiting for her on their bed, a special package from her favorite, Chagganlal Mittaiwala. Khushi's joy knew no bounds and she almost jumped up and down in joy shouting out, Arnavji! Thank you, thank you! Arnav's looked at her smiling luscious lips and asked where was his gift? as he lowered his head to steal a kiss. But Khushi took a step back. Asking him to wait for a minute, she vanished in to their bedroom and returned with a white cover which she handed over to him saying, that it was her gift.
Arnav's forehead scrunched up as he flipped it open and drew out a single sheet of paper, wondering what it held. The inscription on the top of the sheet announced that it as a lab report. Arnav gasped, Khushi! admonishing her for not telling him that she had not been feeling well! Why had she not told him about it? Seeing his panic, Khushi pouted and asked him, to read fully before pouncing on her. Her voice that carried conviction, made Arnav's eyes scan through the report that read, Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada had been tested for pregnancy, and the result was... POSITIVE +. Arnav stared at the paper and then at Khushi's face. It compelled him to reread the report carefully wondering if he had misread it. His unbelievably slow reading and comprehension of what was written had an impatient Khushi on tenterhooks. Unable to withstand his snail's pace, on a teasing note she blurted, that he was so slow! If it were Salman Khanji in his place, he would have lifted his wife in his arms and twirled her around! But Arnav was beyond all teasing, he was not going to rise to the bait. He was stumped to know that their family was all set to grow. From two, they were to become three and as confirmation, he asked whether they were really going to have a baby? Her laughing banter that, she thinks it to be a baby and for all she knew, it could be a jalebi too, did not elicit a fitting repartee. He stared at the report once more before folding it carefully and putting it in his pocket. He then knelt at her feet, and touched her tummy reverentially. He called out to Khushi softly and uttered, our baby, in a soft whisper, as if scared of disturbing the kid. Khushi smiled and affirmed it to be so. With his fingers softly splayed on her stomach as though protecting it from the outside world, he promised his unborn child that, he would take care of it and make sure nothing bad would ever touch it. He would strive his utmost to be a better father than his own ever was to him. While he promised, his voice choked and kissed her tummy repeatedly. With this, he admitted to his wife and his unborn child that he had a lousy childhood that he would never wish upon his child. He wished it would experience nothing but love, peace, security and all the things that were necessary to grow into a healthy child. When the child grew up and thought of fairness and integrity, he wanted it to think of him and his life. This showed how much he wanted to gain credence in the eyes of his child, one that he had lacked for his father in his life.
As he buried his face against the soft skin of her stomach, she could feel his tears against her skin, and held him close for a long moment. Then he asked how did she know that she was carrying? She frowned at the strange way that she found out and said, that it was the most amazing thing, could he ever imagine she, Khushi, refusing jalebi! Arnav's face lit with a smile at her admission and at the thought of such an incomprehensible act and nodded, that he could not. He was amused at her dependence on that sweet meat and her confidence of never disliking jalebis. She told him with a serious note in her voice that, Buaji had prepared jalebi for her, and the minute she opened the bin, she almost threw up at the smell. So she knew there was something very wrong with her basically. Her words made Arnav stare at her in wonder for he knew not a time when Khushi would turn her face from jalebi, more so when her Buaji had prepared them for her Titliyaa! She smiled as she told him that she had been to their family doctor who had directed her to a gynecologist. It was then she had realized that the problem lay not with the jalebi, but with the Li'l Arnav Singh Raizada growing inside her. Arnav, who now felt the information seep in clearly, what the report really meant, was gloriously happy. He stood up and hugged her tight breathing out, Khushi... As Khushi burrowed in to his arms, feeling safe and content, he told her that, this was the best Diwali of his life. Khushi smiled contently as he told her that this was the best Diwali gift she could ever give him. His lips that ever so gently touched hers, soon changed to raining kisses on her face and lips, punctuating the words with addictive kisses, some sweet as honey, some hot as chilly, but sizzling all the way through. She felt happiness stirring inside her grow wings, let loose, and fly. Khushi whispered with a serious face asking Arnav to promise her and he without knowing what she wanted from him did so with utmost love. She asked him to promise her that, whatever happened in the future, whether good or bad, they would always be together. He vowed to fulfill that. For them, this was the beginning of their family, where life begins and love never ends. As he scooped her up in his arms and carried her to bed, she pouted asking him to promise that even if they were blessed with an army of children, he would always love her the most. He knew anyone could have caught his eye but it took someone special to catch his heart and the most worthwhile person to cherish and adore in his life was the person who loved him when he was not really very lovable. That for him was Khushi was without any doubt. Arnav, smiling against her lips, loving this dependence of her on him, vowed to her that he would fulfill her wishes and she would always be his first and best Sanka Devi, for she was the best thing that ever happened to him. With her query he knew that he had gained credence in her eyes much beyond his expectations and he was thrilled by it.
In this update we see Arnav lending credence to their marriage in the eyes of the world showing that it was he who was blessed to have been accepted by Khushi as her life-partner. We see Arnav's apology gaining credence in the eyes of Khushi and Khushi too giving credence to his apology opens up to state her thoughts, likes and dislikes. Arnav's words to his unborn child shows how much he wanted a father who had some credibility that he could look upon in his life.
That is why it is titled CREDENCE.
"The path of sound credence is through the thick forest of skepticism"
~ George Jean Nathan
SAVING KHUSHI is about saving Khushi from Shyam. It is also the saving of the Khush or Happiness of Raizadas' and Guptas' in general and Arnav, Anjali and Khushi in particular. By putting many bad memories to rest they have made a new life for themselves. It was a beautiful narration that began with the Diwali, where the lights went out plunging into darkness and ended with another Diwali, with the lights glowing bright. Lovely story indeed! Wonderful work Smita.
"We delight in the beauty of the butterfly. But rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty"
~ Mary Angelou
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
ADDENDUM:
It has been a lovely journey and my heartfelt thanks to all the readers for their immense encouragement. Thank you dears.
Rashmi.
Loved the VM Smita,
ReplyDeleteNice theme and sequence!
Thank u, my dear! I love the song.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHehehehe....the family already knwz dat arnav ;-)
ReplyDeleteThey are so used to you mooning over Khushi now..ha..ha..
DeleteKhushi's husband, the lion is totally in a 'we are legally married, haq hai hamara ek dusre par' mode !! Yeah, so the entire family is in the living room, trying to stifle their laughter... who cares, 'I am just exercising my right, kaun rokega mujhe ? '
ReplyDeleteSmita, waise bhi mundane day-to-day chores like making aloo pakode, doing yoga, wearing a seat belt, using a stapler, making rangoli etc, etc have become sweet tortures. Now you have added roti making to the list, which clearly means I will be burning atleast 2-3 rotis in my kitchen everyday. !!
Saada haq! Your children will have to get used to eating burnt rotis now.
Deleteloved the scene between Arshi...
ReplyDeleteHa..ha..
DeleteLovely update... Loved the scenes... i can just imagine arnav face when HP brings the juice... WHAT THE.... hehehehehe
ReplyDeleteIF ID : Swty_arshionly
It must have been a sight!!!
Deleteangry to very naughty ASR and i love him for that lolz.
ReplyDeletei lovd the juice part and everything.
He is one naughty guy, making up for lost time!!!
DeleteBrilliant. Loved ASR's naughty moments.
ReplyDeleteHe is wicked.
DeleteWow I would say I have never imagined ASR can be this romantic and it's really a treat to read this
ReplyDeleteWe missed it in the serial.
Deletevery beautiful update and the love birds spending their passionate time in GH without any interuption hayeeee and the last banner is just damn hot.
ReplyDeleteThank u, thank u! Stole the pic from Google.
DeleteDi wants to learn to paint. The first thought that comes to ASR's mind is that his Right hand man Aman can arrange for a home tutor; if that is what his Di wants !! Hope Aman gets a hefty bonus package this Diwali, what with the multitude of assignments that ASR directs at him. :-)
ReplyDeleteFeels nice to know that Di wants to disassociate herself from her filthy past and get involved in something worthwhile. The first step towards becoming self-reliant. Letting go of the past and starting afresh sure calls for immense courage.
Nk- "handsome chikni chameli' Ha ha :-)
ASR has met his match in Khushi. The lion and his lioness... dono paagal hai par cute hai. The husband who longingly gazes at his wife from his rear-view mirror, as he drives off.. how is he supposed to survive 2 days without touching her, teasing her or staring at her to his heart's content ? The annoyed wife yells at her husband, hangs up on him and then starts missing him the very next moment..Ha..ha. They really are made for each other.
Last but not the least, the beautiful banner with those lil hearts complements a very adorable update.
Yes Sanka Devi's Sanka Dev!!!!
Deletehayeeee they are just too adorable together and i loved this updte like anything Smita.
ReplyDeletethe nok jhok, the cute fight and lastly the steaming love, hayeeee mein marjawaaan.
awesme Smita and i love u for this.
That was one cute and romantic part dear. Loved it. Looking eagerly for interpretation and next part.
ReplyDeleteYour stories are becoming shorter? Or is it my imagination?
ReplyDeleteWow an amazing ending !!! I love reading ur stories !
ReplyDeleteI knw and I m srry I dnt comment regularly
Bt exams n clg schedules get to me !!
I will comment regularly once my vacations start
Waiting for ur new story :-D
Hey Ram it ended and so beautifully?
ReplyDeletewill miss this but eagerly waiting for next week now.
amazing end and just died after seeing the last pic, hayeeee my love birds. going to my dreamland again ahahhaha.
love u Smita and thanks for this wonderful story. stay blessed.
So it's Diwali 360 for Khushi.
ReplyDeleteArnav apologises for breaking Khushi's heart and also for inflicting pain on Lavanya.
Khushi associates her heartbreak with red sarees and diyas. She wants to steer clear of anything that jogs her memory of last Diwali's insults, making Arnav realise the consequences of his outrageous actions and the scale of the hurt caused.
Awww, the proud parents are awaiting the arrival of a tiny golgappa-laad governor or a cute sanki-jalebi rani, or both. Most definitely the best Diwali ever.
Enjoyed this emotional journey. 'Marrying Khushi', (the title itself is fascinating) begins next week. I know sabar ka phal meetha hota hai, but you know patience is not one of my virtues when it comes to your stories. Tick tock tick tock........
A beautiful ending. Enjoyed this emotional story. Now waiting for the next one "marrying khushi".
ReplyDeleteIt's one hell of a story and one hell of an end...you have ended on perfect day ..Diwali...and closed that part as well..awesome
ReplyDeleteBeautiful ending! waiting for ur next one...
ReplyDeleteLoved the ending... its always good over evil...
ReplyDelete