96. Loving Khushi: Part 9: Day 5: Section 2

Part 9: Day 5: Section 2A

“Why are you doing this, Arnavji?” Her face was a picture of confusion.

Arnav swallowed hard.

“Khushi, you said that we should never have met.” he started.

Khushi nodded slowly.

“I didn’t realise why you had said so then. It was as I thought about what you said that I realised how right you were.” he confessed.

Khushi’s brow furrowed. Keeping track of Arnavji’s thoughts was more difficult than managing a room full of naughty children running in different directions at the same time.

“I caused Payal’s wedding to be cancelled. I stripped you off your dignity by airing the video clip. My actions hounded you out of Lucknow to Delhi.” Arnav sighed. “And in Delhi, I made your life hell in the office. I never lost an opportunity to hurt you when you were working at my home. And then our terrible marriage… Khushi, directly and indirectly, I have given you only trouble… I stole your peace, your reputation, your financial security, your place in your family, your happiness… I destroyed your life. I shattered the very foundation of the life you had built for yourself during the last 10 years or so…”

Khushi felt a big lump in her throat.

“Before you met me, you were happy, carefree. You had dreams, a future, a place in your family, in your society… Khushi, I ruined you. I destroyed everything you held dear. Khushi, let me return everything I took from you.”

Khushi stared at him, his moist eyes and his earnest appeal pulling at her heart strings.

“Khushi, you want to leave me. I don’t want you to. I don’t like the thought. But I know that you are entitled to leave me. Because I have been a bad husband, a terrible employer, and a cruel, terrible man to know. Go. Leave me on the 15^th if you want to. But when you leave me, you should go taking with you everything I snatched from you.” Arnav whispered.

She looked at him.

Arnav cradled her face in his palms. “You will be Khushi Arnav Singh Raizada, with the weight of her husband’s family behind her. You will never be alone, Khushi. You will never be helpless again, Khushi. No one will take your name without respect, Khushi. Nobody will question the genuineness of the mangalsutra you are wearing. No one will wonder if you actually have  a husband or not…. Khushi, where ever you go, my name will protect you.” His fingers touched the black beads of her mangalsutra gently. “Take that even if you leave me.”

Khushi drew in a breath with great difficulty.

“Arnavji, you don’t have to… I don’t need…”

“I know you don’t need me to do this, Khushi. I know that you are capable of rising from your ashes again. You will find a job. You will look after your family. You will live. You don’t need me to do anything for you… But I need to do this, Khushi. I need to do this if I have to live on.” Arnav said, his voice shaking with emotion.

A tear escaped from her eye. Arnav kissed it away.

“Khushi, you dreamed about your marriage, didn’t you? That you would have your family with you? That all would be happy? There would be lights, flowers, and laughter? And jalebis…?” he asked.

Khushi nodded slowly.

“I made a mockery of your dreams 6 months ago, Khushi. Let me make up for that. Let me give you the wedding of your dreams… And Khushi, marrying me does not mean that you have to stay here after the 15^th. This is not a trick to make you stay.” Arnav said.

She looked in to his tired eyes, bruised from lack of sleep and worry and tears.

“Arnavji… I will marry you.” Khushi said, unable to bear his pain and his guilt any longer. “But you have to promise me something.”

Arnav looked at her enquiringly.

“That you will put our past out of your mind. That you won’t worry about every single incident that happened between us during the last one-and–a-half years and regret them…” How could she walk away, leaving him to burn in the fire of his guilt?

Arnav kissed her hand fervently.

“I will try, Khushi. I promise I will try. Will you try with me? Can you put our past behind us? Can you forgive me? Can we start anew?” His eyes held hope, eagerness, desperation…

Khushi nodded.


Smita,
Here is the interpretation to Section 2 A of Part 9.
This update is about accepting things reluctantly but without protest. ACQUIESCE.
When Arnav assured Khushi that she may leave him on 15^th, even after they get married, as she asked why was he doing it, Khushis mind was a ball of confusion that mirrored on her face. Arnav felt contrite for putting her through such confusion after having to stomach all that he had dished out. He began his explanation saying, that she had told that they should never have met. As Khushi nodded, he confessed that he had not realized then why such a statement came out of her mouth, from her who had loved him unconditionally. He acceded that it was only when he thought about it, whole night through he realized, how right she was. A deep frown etched on Khushis forehead. Keeping track of Arnavjis thoughts was quite a tough job compared to managing a room full of naughty tykes prancing about. With a sigh he accepted that he was the cause of Payals wedding to be cancelled. He agreed as to being the one who caused her humiliation, by airing the footage, shredding her off her dignity and become an easy target for hooligans. His action had hounded her and caused to uproot herself from Lucknow to Delhi and endure the accompanying turmoil. And in Delhi he had made her life a living hell while at his office. He had left no opportunity pass by to hurt her while she was working at his home. And then their dreadful marriage that left her in a terrible situation, of being punished for no crime of hers. Swallowing a bitter pill he agreed that one way or the other, all he did for her was spell trouble. He bowed down to state he was the one who had been the cause for the loss of her peace, reputation, financial security, her place in the family, goodwill of her family, her happiness, values and dignity everything that were dear to her. In fact he had destroyed her life, shook her to her very being and shattered the very foundation that her life was built upon in the past ten years or so.  Seeing the relenting Arnav, Khushi felt her chest constrict. He told her that before they met, she was a happy, carefree girl filled with rosy dreams, a place in her family and in her society, a bright future where she had pictured open acceptance of her on her marriage and warmth of the family she was married to. He has ruined her and destroyed all that she had held dear. He had shattered her dreams. He wanted to make amends and restore everything that he took away from her. This was the Arnav who accepting his series of bad judgement, was amenable to do anything she wanted, to rectify the situation.
Khushi stared at him and saw that he was filled with remorse. The tell tale signs of his moist eyes and the earnest appeal in them pulled at her heart strings. He whispered his heartfelt thoughts that while she wants to leave him, he does not want her to and even the thought of it was abhorrent to him. But he will give in knowing that she is entitled to leave him and he cannot and will not bind her as he had been a bad husband, a worse employer and a cruel, dreadful man to know. If she wants to, she was free to leave him on the 15^th. But while doing so, she should be able to leave taking all he had snatched from her and with her dignity intact. As Khushi looked at him with a stunned expression, Arnav cradling her face between his palms, promised her that she would be Khushi Arnav Singh Raizada, with the name of her husband and his family as her protection. She would never be alone or helpless again. Neither any one would be able to take her name without respect nor point out towards the genuineness of the mangalsutra, she was wearing. No one would be able to speculate whether she really has a husband or if so, why was he stashed away from them.  Fingering the black beads he told her that wherever she goes his name will be a shield that would protect her. Knowing her mind, accepting her need, knowing very well the significance of mangalsutra on her neck and her reverence towards it and the institution of marriage, he gently asked her to take the mangalsutra with her even if she leaves him.
Khushi drawing in her breath quivered inside, at the way he was easing things for her. She told him that he did not need to do it. Arnav in a voice filled with emotion acknowledged, that he knew that she does not need his help. He was aware of her capacity to bounce back. She would find herself a job and with her usual panache will look after her family. She would be able to move ahead without taking any aid from him. But it was what he needed to do, if he has to live on. By the time he finished saying so much, his voice had begun to quiver. He had laid open his heart and mind in front of Khushi. This time, he did not try to hide his feelings and showed her how vulnerable the once invincible Arnav Singh Raizada has become now. By baring his thoughts in front of her, he has shown how much he trusts her and their love. By doing so, he has shown that he is reconciled to the idea of her leaving him if she wished to and his only intention in doing this was to give her the security that she never had, that of the knowledge, come what may she has him backing her.  Hearing his words and seeing his state, the arrogant ASR brought to his knees and seeking her consent in all humbleness, a lone glistening pearl from her limpid pools of her eyes that made its way down her cheek was scooped and kissed away by his lips, for he was determined not to let any more precious tears escape from her eyes due to him.
He asked her, she had dreamt about her marriage. Had she not? Was it not about a marriage taking place amidst her family and all being happy about it? Was it not meant to be with lights glittering, flowers lending their perfume and pleasing the eyes and laughter echoing all around? Were not mountains of jalebis too a part of her dream? When Khushi nodded slowly affirming all he said, he accepted that he had made a mockery of her dreams and burst each and every one of them six months earlier. She was made to embrace things that were unwarranted and uncalled for, He wanted a chance to set this right. He wanted to give her a wedding of her dreams. He wanted to bring her dream into a reality with no strings attached. He assured her that the marriage was not meant to bind her to him. It was not a trick played on her. She was a free bird to do as she deemed fit after 15^th. All he wanted to do was to subscribe to her happiness.
Looking into his tired eyes that were puffy and had bags under it due to lack of sleep, worry and tears, unable to see his pain and what his guilt had reduced him to, she yielded and assured him that she would marry him, but he needed to promise her something. When Arnav looked at her with an enquiry in his eyes, she sought his assurance that he would come out of his guilt trip by putting their past out of his mind and not worry about every single incident that happened between them in the past one and a half years and regret them. He needed to adapt himself and that adjustment was vital lest he wasted himself away. She knew she would not be able walk away, leaving him to burn in his personal hell. Hearing her words of solace and comfort that were meant to absolve him of guilt, even when she was the one who bore the brunt being innocent, Arnav realizing the extent of  her unconditional love kissed her hand with ardor, humble submission and respect. He adored her and admired her for possessing a heart large enough to forgive and strive to comfort him when she herself was in turmoil. In business parlance, she had cut a deal, befitting the wife of a businessman. He promised her that he would try, and with eyes holding hope, eagerness, desperation requested her, will she too try it out with him. Can she bring herself to put their past behind them and start anew? With her nod, his request found an acceptance from her.
In this update, both have accepted what they are and given space for the other to get over their murky combined past. They have agreed to one thing that they would be bound together even if she plans to separate for the time being. He asks her to take with her his protection and to face the world with her dignity intact while she asks him not to knuckle under the past. Both acquiesce to try to shake themselves out of the past, a stupor they had fallen into and look ahead for a bright future in the times to come. Meanwhile they would go ahead with their marriage.
That is why this update is called ACQUIESCE.
Where the waters do agree, it is quite wonderful the relief  they give
                                 ~ Jane Austen, Emma
Thats it from me. Hope you enjoy it.

Part 9: day 5: Section 2B

It was evening, time for the wedding of Arnav Singh Raizada & Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada.

RM was decorated to within an inch of its life, every available space showing off fairy lights and sweet-smelling flowers. No one would believe that it had all been arranged in a few hours by the family.

The wedding was a very happy occasion. The Guptas and the Raizadas knew that Arnav had behaved terribly. But they knew Shyam too. They now had a fair idea of how dangerous and crooked the man was, how helpless Arnav must have felt that day... And they knew that Arnav loved Khushi more than his own life and that Khushi couldn’t bear to be parted from her Arnavji for a moment. So they decided to let go of their anger and disappointment and celebrate the wedding to the fullest.

Because it was just the Guptas and the Raizadas, all were relaxed. They didn’t have to see to any guests, and could enjoy the ceremony. Every face held a smile.

Arnav came down wearing a gold& maroon kurta that his Di had gifted him many months back, which he had pushed to one corner of his cupboard and hoped to forget. NK & Akash, dressed in pink & green kurtas accompanied him.

Anjali & Payal led Khushi down to the hall for the wedding. She was wearing the red sari that Arnav had given her. The red sari & the simple diamond jewellery made her look beyond beautiful. Images of the photo shoot in which she had been wearing similar clothes flashed through Arnav’s head as she walked down to join him.

Khushi stole a glance at him. Arnavji looked very handsome, more handsome than he looked while wearing his usual black/blue/brown coat & suit. He was looking at her as though he had seen a wondrous sight, his eyes conveying their heart-felt appreciation of her looks. Khushi coukld feel blood rushing to her cheeks.

All laughed.

“Married for 6 months, and the girl is still blushing!” Nani chuckled.

“Hum bhi bahute sharmilee thi, Nandkisore!” Buaji laughed. “Titliya’s Phoophaji had to peek under my ghoonghat to see my face…”

“Nannav is blushing too!” NK discovered.

Arnav raised an eyebrow at him, challenging his discovery silently. If there was a flush of happiness on his cheeks, he couldn’t be faulted for it.

“Blushing?” Mami asked, laughing. “Pehle shaadi ho to blushing samajh aawat he, Arnav Bitwaa. But yeh to Seconds he, Hello Hi Bye Bye!”

In the midst of a cloud of laughter, Arnav & Khushi took the blessings of their elders, receiving many hugs in return.

It was time for Jaimala and Khushi lifted her arms to garland Arnav. NK & Akash made to lift Arnav to prevent Khushi from garlanding him. Arnav lifted his hand, stopping the boys from teasing Khushi. He bent his head and let Khushi place the fragrant garland around his neck. Arnav quickly garlanded Khushi before someone snatched her away from him.

“That is ramanchi! Nannav, you are siding with Khushiji against us, your own brothers!” NK complained.

All laughed. 

“NK bitwaa!” Mami explained. “You are only Arnav Bitwaa’a brothers. She ijj his baife! (wife)”

In the ensuing laughter, Anjali & Payal led the groom & the bride to sit by the Purohit in front of the havan arranged in the mandap. They sat in chairs by them, guarding the mangalsutra they had removed from Khushi’s neck 10 minutes back.

Khushi looked around in astonishment. Chains of stars dangled from the frame of the mandap. She turned wide eyes towards Arnav.

“Your stars.” he said, smiling.

Khushi looked at him, lost for words.

He pointed at the fairy lights. “Lights for you.”

Khushi looked at the lights and then at him.

“If you are planning to get entangled in them, let me know. I am ever ready to take them off you.” he smiled fondly, his mind lost in the past.

Khushi shook her head to mean ‘No.’

“Sure?” he asked.

Khushi nodded, smiling slightly.

"A pity." he murmured.

“Arnav Bitwaa!” Mami shouted. “Don’t talk so much. Oo kaa he, you have your full laiphe (life) in front of you. if you phinish (finish) talking eberything (everything) now, bhat will you do phor (for) the next 80 ijears (years)?”

All laughed. Arnav & Khushi flushed.

Arnav nodded towards the smiling faces of their relations, their laughter at their expense. “Joy.” Her face softened seeing their happiness. NK winked at her from his seat.

“Flowers.” He pointed to the masses of blossoms decorating the house. Khushi gulped.

“I have arranged jalebi for dinner.” he whispered as the priest started chanting. “From your favourite halwai in Chandni Chowk.”

Khushi had to smile.

Arnav whispered to Khushi, “You look beautiful, Khushi.” His tongue put in words what she could read in his eyes. She looked away, unable to meet his gaze.

The marriage took place, ritual after ritual done by the bride and the groom under the watchful eyes of the Purohit. They took the saath phere, and both families sighed with happiness at the small smiles on the faces of the bride and groom. 

Arnav tied her mangalsutra around her neck once more. But this time he did it with reverence. Khushi felt her eyes prick at the feeling in his eyes.

Arnav took a pinch of sindoor in his fingers. He lifted her maangtikka, kissed her maang, and placed the sindoor there.

All smiled.

Khushi trembled, feeling her mind letting go of the nightmare of her forced marriage, feeling the bitter memories being replaced by sweet ones, so sweet that she would never forget in a lifetime...

Arnav & Khushi took the blessings of the Purohit and their family.

Arnav walked in to their bedroom to see khushi sitting on the recliner in all her wedding finery. He smiled.

They had endured hours of post-wedding games, giving in good naturedly to the fun their families were having at their expense. The only thing that Arnav had put his foot down was decorating their bedroom for the suhaag raat. He had strongly vetoed the idea and held firm against the pleas of his brothers and Di.

And now, finally, they were alone in their room.

He walked up to Khushi, kneeled down before her, and hugged her tight.

“Thank you, Khushi.” he said.

She looked at him, not knowing what to say in response.

“Did you enjoy the wedding?’ he asked.

Khushi had to smile. She had loved it. It had been a dream come true. Arnavji’s smiling face, his happiness at getting married, the laughter of their family, the jalebi, the lights, flowers, the stars… She nodded.

“I wanted you to have everything you missed last time.” Arnav said.

“I understand, Arnavji.” Khushi said.

“It is late. Are you tired, Khushi?’ he asked.

Khushi nodded.

“Me too.” Arnav said. He hadn’t slept for days. “Let’s go to bed. Shall I help you out of  the jewellery?”

“Ji.” Khushi said.

Arnav took the earrings off her lobes, his fingers sending a trail of fire down her body. He helped her remove the dupatta, pushed her hair gently away from her nape, and unfastened the necklace. He removed her maangtikka, taking care not to smudge her sindoor. He removed her bangles, one by one, his touch sensitising her skin till pleasure felt like pain.

He placed her jewels in their box, and went to his wardrobe to get his casual clothes out. Khushi took her white suit. They took turns in the bathroom, and got in to bed.

Arnav hugged her close to his heart. He kissed her forehead, and whispered, “Khushi, now we are husband and wife. In real and to others. We belong together, till the end of our lives, Khushi. No one can part us. No one can keep you away from me or me away from you.”

Khushi looked in to his happy eyes.

“I hope you will stay with me even after the contract period is over, Khushi. But I won’t force you. If you want to go to Buaji’s house on the 15^th, I will drop you there. I will tell all of them why we aren’t staying together. I don’t care how much time it takes, Khushi. But one day, you will realise you love me as much as I love you. And you will come back to me.”

Khushi swallowed hard.

“I know you love me, Khushi. I have seen it in your deeds, in the care you lavish on me, in every look, felt it in every touch... One day you will tell me how much you love me. That day you will realise that you can’t live without me, just as I can’t live without you. That day, we can begin our life together.”

“How do you know that day will ever come?” Khushi asked, her voice low.

“I know it will. Because I trust you and your love for me. Because I have faith in my love for you.” he murmured.

Khushi’s eyes filled up.

“Don’t cry, Khushi.” Arnav admonished her. “It is nothing to cry about. And I have to confess that I will be trying very hard to make that day come fast.”

Khushi looked at him, startled.

Arnav proceeded to kiss her senseless, till she was  a pile of mush, clinging to his broad shoulders, panting, her heart thundering away…

Khushi looked in to the molten chocolate eyes, burning with love and desire for her.

Without her knowledge, her hands crept to the neck of his T-shirt, trying to make their way in, trying to pull the cloth down, trying to touch more of his skin.

“Sshh…” Arnav warned, smiling his wicked smile. “Don’t tempt me too much. My self-control has its limits. Living in the same room with you for 6 months without kissing you and making love to you has taken almost all of it, Khushi. I am hanging here by a thread, Khushi.”

Khushi squirmed closer to him.

“One more kiss, that’s all.” Arnav declared. “After that we are going to sleep like good children.”

Khushi glared at him.

Arnav burst out laughing.




Smita,

Here is the interpretation to Section 2 B of Part 9.
This update is all about being genuine, legitimate, ritually proper. In a word, KOSHER
What exactly is Kosher?
Kosher is a Yiddish word, but now used in English too.
It is a word derived from the ancient Hebrew word, Kasher meaning proper, pure and lawful.
In Yiddish, it is used to describe the method of preparing their food, those conforming to the laws of kashrut.
In English, it is used to describe something genuine, legitimate and ritually proper.
By the evening, in time for the wedding of Arnav Singh Raizada and Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada, RM was decorated with flowers emanating their bewitching perfume that made it look like the house itself had bloomed and the fairy lights interspersed like a gossamer web emitting out the golden hues of sunrise making it look dreamy almost ethereal. It looked as though the RM itself had dressed up to welcome Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada with open arms, to give her the status of the elder bahu in an appropriate manner, a befitting welcome to her, in a sharp contrast to what she underwent the previous time. No one who saw it would have believed that it was put together in a matter of few hours by the family.
The wedding itself was a happy occasion. The Guptas and Raizadas knew that Arnav had behaved abominably but they also knew how Shyam was and what elicited such behavior from Arnav, a feeling of helplessness in the face of conning two of the women he loved the most. Shyam was not only a silver-tongued two-timing crooked con man but also a bad egg who was an incorrigible varmint swindler, hell bent on possessing all that he layed eyes on and a blackguard at heart. For they knew that Arnav and Khushi for all their bickering and fights were a pair made for each other. Arnav loved Khushi more than his own life and Khushi could not bear to be parted from her Arnavji for a moment. Having made a clean breast of the things that he did to Khushi, Arnav succeeded to impress upon the rest to accept that he had done so under the stressful situation where he had no other go. So collectively they let go of their anger and disappointment and endorsed to welcome Khushi and Arnav as a couple in the time-honored way, the conventional wedding with all the rituals it entails and celebrate the wedding to its fullest for the happy future of the couple. Since it was just the family, the Guptas and Raizadas, it was a relaxed affair as they did not need to stand on ceremony. Every face was aglow with happiness.
Arnav came down wearing a gold and maroon sherwani, a customary mens wear that his Di had gifted him quite sometime back, which had only seen the shelf so far and he had hoped to forget about it as it was not the type of clothing he preffered. It was a shot gold sherwani made of dupion silk with simple dhabka work at collar and cuff with maroon thread teamed with a maroon churidaar, matching stole and mojris that attracted all eyes towards him. NK and Akash, dressed in pink and green kurtas accompanied him.
Anjali and Payal led Khushi down to the hall for the wedding. She was in the conventional yet fashionable wedding wear, wearing the red tulle saree with its silk velvet applique and beads strewn in edged by the ornamental flocked border in gold thread that Arnav had given her. The red sari and the delicate looking elegant diamond jewellery made her look beyond beautiful. Her beauty broke on Arnav like a rare flower. Images of the photo shoot in which she had been wearing similar clothes looking stunning, with her innocence and shyness shining out, flitted across Arnavs mind as she walked down to join him.
As Khushi neared him she peeked at him with eyes like twinkling stars, she felt her heart increase its beat. She had never thought that it was possible for him to look much more dapper than he usually was! His preferred black/blue/brown suit ensemble that had girls swoon over him was nothing in comparison to this ethnic look he sported that looked as though the outfit was made for him. She thought he would be able to hear the thunderous beat that was defeaning her ears with just one look at this man who was her husband and tormentor of her thoughts. Then, her eyes noted that his face too held the same wonderous look. His eyes were acknowledging her, by heaping the dreamy admiration that her heart had longed for, when she had dreamt of her wedding. It made her cheeks vie with her saree, like a blushing cloud and her expression, changed with the rapidity of a kaleidoscope. All laughed at the sight and Nani showed her approval with her chuckle and saying, married for six months and the girl is still blushing. Buaji giving out belly laughter told them, that she too was a shy girl and Titliyaas phoophaji had to peek under her veil to catch a glimpse of his bride! NKs loud, Nannav is blushing had Arnav raise an eyebrow in a silent challenge at NK. Even if there was smile that was like the dawn colouring his cheeks, nobody could deny him his right to happiness. Mami, who could never let go of such a golden opportunity quipped in her inimitable way, Blushing? If it was marrying for the first time then one could understand blushing to the roots, Arnav Bitwaa, but this is the second time round! She ended with her signature phrase, Hello Hi Bye Bye! The family showed its happiness by their pure clean ribbing. Amidst hilarity, Arnav and Khushi took the blessings of their elders, receiving many hugs in return.
During the Jaimala, when Khushi lifted her arms to garland Arnav, NK and Akash lifted him out of Khushis reach, to tease her. But Arnav with a single gesture of lifting his hand stopped them mid way and bent his head and let Khushi place the garland around his neck. It was his way of showing her that he was dead serious when he said that he would protect her. He was ready to do so even if it had been for jest. For him she was like a delicate flower that needed to be nurtured. Even the warm sun rays would at times be too much and he was not prepared to let her face such a situation. Once she did the needful, Arnav in a flash garlanded Khushi lest somebody lifted her above his reach! His sweet gesture towads his sweet heart made NK complain that was cheating Nannav! He was siding with Khushiji against his own brothers! It evoked gales of laughter. Mami diplomatically explained to NK saying, that they were only Arnav Bitwaas brothers. She was his wife! only to be greeted by peals of laughter. Though the rest saw it in jest, it was meant for Khushi to see the earnestness, of his love for her as well as his intention of putting things in proper perspective.
Amidst the ensuing laughter, Anjali and Payal led the groom and the bride to sit by the purohit in front of the havan arranged in the mandap. They sat in chairs by them, keeping the mangalsutra safe that they had removed from Khushis neck ten minutes back. Khushi was surprised to see strings of stars dangling from the frame of the mandap all around them. As she trained her widened eyes at Arnav, he said with a bright smile that they were her stars. He had placed her stars to make her feel that her complete family, her real parents too, were with her on her big day! It was a beautiful gesture on his part to make her feel happy and content. A gesture that also showed he was placing her wishes above everything else in his life. A gesture that showed that he repented for having uttered that it was good her parents were not able to see how she had turned out to be. It was an appropriate gesture that overwhelmed Khushi and when he pointed at the fairy lights saying, lights for her, all Khushi could do was turn her head from lights to him. Remembering the past, he asked her with a broad smile, if she was planning to get entagled just to let him know and he was ever ready to untangle her. Khushi just nodded to indicate a no!  His persistent, was she sure, elicited a nod, and a smile tug on her lips, making him murmur, what a pity! All the talk and murmurs sitting in the mandap made Mami quip, Not to talk so much! He has all his life ahead to talk. If he finishes talking everything now itself what will he do for the next 80 years ahead? At the expense of the bride and the groom, all laughed while they turned beet red. Once again they were treated to warm hearted ribbing confirming how pertinent  their wedding was!
Arnav showing her all the things that she had wanted in her wedding he pointed towards the smiling faces of their relations and their laughter at their expense and said, Joy. Her face softened seeing the beaming faces, a becoming expression showing their happiness and NK seeing that she was looking in his direction winked with happiness for his friend. Pointing to the cascade of flowers, he said another one, as per her dream. Khushi was beyond words. He told her that he had arranged jalebi for dinner and it was from her favorite halwai in Chandni Chowk. By then Khushi was forced to smile at the pains he had taken to make the wedding exactly as per her wish. It made her feel cherished.  While the purohit chanted the mantras, Arnav whispered, that she looks beautiful. Khushi recognized that he spoke what exactly his eyes were conveying all along. Khushi unable to meet his eyes skittered her gaze away.
The marriage rituals were done by the bride and the groom under the guidance of the purohit and under the gaze of the beaming family. As they completed their saath phere, the family heaved a sigh of relief and was filled with happiness at the smile visible on the face of Arnav and Khushi. Now it was an established fact that they were a lawfully wedded couple as per the convention.
What is the significance of saath phere?
We know saath phere is taking seven rounds around the havan promising to be there for each other in the presence of fire that symbolizes purity. I will not delve into what these stand for as each one of us is aware of these vows. What I want to say is Saptapadi or saath phere is the closure of the main marriage ritual that begins with Panigrahana or placing the hand of the bride over the grooms. Once this phere is done the couple is said to be married. The Hindu Marriage Act of 1955 recognizes the completion of the seventh round as the moment at which the marriage transaction attains the legal status. The ancient law texts too say the same, be it Manu smrithi or Likhita smrithi.
The sindoor and the mangalsutra are to confirm the new family membership of the couple.That is why just applying sindoor and tying mangasutra does not constitute marriage.
In the story of Shalivahana who becomes the emperor later under whose name the Hindu years are calculated, Shalivahana shaka varsh, or Shalivahana era, he had taken saath pheres with a princess during a fair as a child game and it was considered to be legal as they had taken saath pheres though not tied the mangalsutra and applied sindoor!
As an additional information,The Shalivahana era, also known as the Saka era, is used with Hindu calendars, the Balinese calendar, the Javanese calendar and the Cambodian Buddhist calendar.
As Arnav tied her mangalsutra around her neck once more with reverence, Khushi felt her eyes prick at the feeling in his eyes. This time Arnav took a pinch of sindoor in his fingers, lifted her maangtikka, kissed her maang, and placed the sindoor there, in a ritually proper manner. All smiled at his gesture not knowing its significance in their life. His simple yet reverential gesture had Khushi tremble with its impact. Her mind let go of the horror filled night of her forced marriage. The bitter memories of that fateful night were replaced by the sweet ones that etched in her mind as well as her heart for her lifetime. Both Arnav and Khushi sought the blessings of the purohit and their family.
When Arnav walked in to his room, it was to see Khushi sitting on the chaise longue in all her wedding finery, making him smile with a light heart. They had endured hours of post-wedding rituals and games giving in to the fun and frolic that the family was enjoying. They went along the flow even though all the fun was at their expense, as they felt the joy of being a part of one big family that was mercifully backing them to the hilt. It was a felicitous happy occasion. The only thing that Arnav had stood firm was to decorating their bedroom for the suhaag raat. He strongly held his ground without yielding to the pleas of his brothers and even his Di. Now finally, when they got to be alone he went near Khushi, knelt before her and hugged her tight saying, Thank You Khushi, a heartfelt one, in a tremulous voice. She looked at him not knowing how to respond. His query, did she enjoy the wedding? had her smile. She had loved it. It had been her dream given life. It had put her on cloud nine. Six months back, it was one dream that she had thought was gone forever. Just like the proverbial pot of gold at the end of rainbow, she had thought it as an illusion. But her Arnavji had made it come true. His smiling face, his happiness at getting married, the laughter of their family, the jalebis, the lights, flowers, the stars all were exactly as she had dreamt and  she beamed bobbing her head affirming that he loved it very much. His words that he wanted her to have everything that she missed last time, affirmed to her what she already knew and made her acknowledge, that she understood. Noting the time, he stated that it was late and asked was she tired? As Khushi nodded, Arnav told her, that he too was drained out. He had not slept well for days together. He told her, that it was a good idea to rest and asked, may he help her out with removing the jewels? As Khushi agreed, he took the earrings off her lobes, his touch sending a blistering trail of fire down her body. He removed her ghoonghat, pushing her hair gently away from her nape, unfastened the necklace. He removed her maangtikka taking care not to smudge her sindoor. He removed her bangles, one by one, his touch sensitising her skin and receiving the pleasure. Once her jewels were placed in its box, both freshened up and got ready to bed. All this were done decorously letting her know that the ball was in her court. She had the right to decide on things, their relationship and on each and everything between them.
Arnav hugging Khushi close to his heart kissed her forehead and whispered, that now they were husband and wife in their eyes as well as the rest of the world. They belong together, till the end of their time and no one can force them to part. No one can keep them away from one another. As Khushi looked into his eyes all she could see was his eyes brimming with happiness. He told her he hoped that she would willingly stay with him after the contract period was over. But he would not be forcing her. If she wants to go she could go to Buajis house on the 15^th and he would drop her there. As far as the query from the rest was concerned, he would let them know why they were not staying together. She need not worry about it and he would not care how long it took her, but he was definite that one day she would realize that she loves him as much as he loves her and she will come back to him of her own free will. His words made Khushi feel a lump in her throat. He told her with conviction that he knows that she loves him. He had seen it in her deeds, in her care that she lavishes on him, in every look, in every touch. One day, she would open up herself to her heart and realize that indeed what he says as true and she would tell him so too, realizing that she would not be able to live without him, just like he cannot live without her. Then for her, life like before would not be sufficient and that would be the day they would begin the new journey as one. Khushi, still mired in self-doubt in a low voice asked him, how does he know that the day will ever come? He murmured to her, that his gut feeling was, that day will come as he trusts her and her love, as he has faith in his love for her. Khushis teared up listening to his words only to further hear words of admonishment asking her not to cry, as it was nothing to feel so teary about. He warned her that, he would be trying his level best to hasten it up. His words startled Khushi. So saying, Arnav proceeded to kiss her with fervor and zeal, assaulting her senseless and making her mind turn into a blob of goo and she cling on to him like a vine to a tree while her heart went throbbing at a blitzkrieg pace that she never knew. Startled hazel eyes looked into the molten caramel ones that were pools of love and desire. As she was swirling in the depths of his eyes, slowly, unknowingly, her hands crept to the neck of his T-shirt, tugging to find access, trying to touch more of his skin. His warning, Shh, was accompanied by the wicked smile of a big bad wolf and asked her not to tempt him too much as his self control has its limits. Living in the same room as her for six months, without kissing her and without making love to her has brought down his self- control to its reserve level. He was barely hanging on to it as he has nearly reached the end of his tether. But Khushi was beyond reasoning. She squirmed at his words and clung to him tighter and moved closer. Arnav declared that it would be just one more kiss and they need to call it a day like all good children do. While his words made Khushi glare at him in frustration and anger, an amused Arnav had a loud belly-laugh seeing her expression. Arnav even if she was ready to give herself to him, he wants her to be his only when she has no doubts about it. Having been with her for six months and knowing her for the past one and a half years, he knows that she has the tendency to give in, if she feels his need. He does not want that he wants her to come to him only when she is clear about her feelings and her unconditional love becomes an unconditional necessity for her just like it is for him. Though he has given her a ritually proper and legally corrected status, as his wife, he wants her to come to him with equal longing for him as he has for her to consummate their marriage. This he has realized will not force her to do things as it had been so far. She would be making the decisions. Only when she comes to him with both her heart and mind as one, they will be able to become one soul. What is acceptable now for him is only proper, pure and genuine relationship and for that he is ready to wait.
That is why this is titled KOSHER.
Freedom is limited by the need to coexist
                                          ~ Toba Beta,                                                                                                                   My                                Ancestor Was an Ancient Astronaut
Thats it from me. Hope you enjoy it.

Part 9: Day 5: Section 2C

He lowered his hard lips to her soft, waiting ones and plundered the sweetness of her mouth. Time ceased to exist for them. Lack of air forced them to part, and Arnav fell away from her to resist the temptation to carry things forward…much forward...

Both lay panting, gasping for breath, looking at the ceiling. A few moments later, Khushi turned her head to look at Arnavji.

She frowned.

He had his hands under his head, a small smile on his lips, looking up at the ceiling with so much attention as if it contained the answers to all the mysteries of the universe.

She pursed her lips. Here she was a puddle of need, her heart running faster than a team of racing horses, her body racked by tremors, and there he was, lying at his ease, contemplating the fate of the universe!

Would she ever understand what went on inside that head? she wondered. First, he had spent all his energy shouting at her and pushing her away. Then he had spent all his energy smiling at her and making her heart throb. Then he had focused on forcing a marriage on her. Then he had put his entire energy in to hating her. Then, after the kidnapping, he had been concentrating on keeping her with him, marrying her for real. And now that they were married, he was trying very hard to ignore her!!!

When would he change next? she wondered. She turned away to lie with her back towards him, giving him the royal ignore.

“Khushi…” came the tempting whisper.

Khushi pretended not to hear it.

“Our time will come. And then…” he paused.

Khushi turned around slightly, pulled by the anticipation in his voice.

“Then there will be no escape for you, my Jalebi Rani.” he threatened, his husky voice dripping honey.

Khushi stared at him.

He turned and pulled her into his arms, spooning her, his front to her back. He whispered in her ear, “You won’t sleep all night, Khushi. I promise.” He bit her ear lobe gently.

Khushi shivered in pleasure, and clutched his arm that was holding her close, needing the support. Hey Devi Maiyya, what would she do with this man? she thought.

Smita,

Here is the interpretation to Section 2 C of Part 9.
This update is about being something difficult to understand be it a person or action. It is ENIGMA.
As Arnav lowered his hard lips on her eagerly waiting luscious ones, he devoured the sweetness of her mouth with a relish. For them, time stood still and feeling the need to take a breath they pulled apart. Arnav pulled himself away from her to resist the temptation to carry ahead. As both lay panting and gasping for breath, they kept their gaze fixed on the ceiling trying to get their breathing even. Khushi turned her head to look at Arnavji only to her bewilderment, it was to find that he had placed his hands under his head and was gazing intently at the ceiling with a small smile tugging along his lips. She was perplexed at his behaviour, and scrunched her forehead wondering, what was there on the ceiling that held his attention as if it gave him secret clues to solve all the mysteries of the cosmos. For her, he was a puzzle, that she could not understand and she did not like what was going on.

Here she was, with her heart racing fast like a wild untamed horse, her body shaking with the tremors, gone all soft and squishy, one mass of need, and there he was, reposing with ease, as though he had time only now to contemplate on the important matter, as the fate of the Universe and its philosophy! He was something of a mystery, interesting, exciting at the same time difficult to explain, difficult to understand, difficult to get to know what he thought. She wondered will she ever be able to make out what was going on in that brain of Arnavji.  Will she be able to solve the riddle by name Arnav Singh Raizada? First when they met, it was a shouting spree. He had used all his energy at shouting at her and at pushing her away. Then it was the smiling spree that made her heart jump with joy and of course, went out of his way to make her heart go dhak dhak! After that it was forcing spree, focusing all his energy to corner her to marry him, next came the hating spree that he did putting his whole heart into it with his regular energy as well as digging on to his reserves. After the kidnapping, he focused his energy on wooing spree, was hell bent on keeping her with him and marrying her for real this time. Now that they are married, he seems to be engrossed in his thoughts ignoring her very presence! He was a bundle of paradox and she wondered, what would be the next step in his evolution. He was a box of uncertainty to her that she could never be certain about what turns up next and never think that he would do things as predicted. She flipped on her side and lay with her back facing him giving him a royal ignore.

When in one moment she decided to do so, the very next she was a confused soul. The conundrum by name, Arnav Singh Raizada, in a low and beguiling voice called out, Khushi. Though she pretended not to hear it, he told her, that their time would come, and paused. Unable to keep quiet or pretend to be indifferent, pulled by the resonating husky voice, Khushi turned her neck around  to hear him tell her, that then, there would be no escape for her, his Jalebi Rani. Right now this Arnav for her was an unknown quantity, someone of whom she has no knowledge of, someone with whom she has no experience to deal with, but his words, thoughts and actions did have a profound effect on the situation.  His voice held so much of promise; it sent frissons of anticipation along her spine making her toes curl. His words made her stare blankly at him, for she was unable to grasp what he meant as her mind had drifted with the sound of his husky voice. Arnav turned and gathering her into his arms, snuggling close, spooning up to her with his warm breath caressing her ear, he whispered, she won't be able to sleep all night and that was his promise to her. So saying he gently nipped her ear lobe making Khushi feel the warmth seep inside her and shivers of pleasure. His behavior and statement to her were like the proverbial Gordian knot, extremely complicated, as he she felt what he said and did amounted to mind-twisters. She clutched his arm that was holding her close, needing that support, she wondered, Devi Maiyya, what would she do with this enigmatic man, for he was mysterious and difficult for her to understand?

For Khushi, Arnav's behavior was enigmatic because all her life her thoughts were based on others needs, her deeds were based on others needs. She had never thought what she wanted. Being an orphan, knowing in her heart that she was always dependant on others, she had stashed away her needs to a remote corner of her heart and she had always thought in terms of giving just like a tree. She never thought of her needs or feelings. She would do things for others at the cost of her own happiness, need and wants be it in thought, action, money or gestures. She was a giver. She had not come across many who had given anything for her other than her family. Meeting Arnav and his dig at her more often than not as a gold-digger, Shyam and his ways, Anjali and her volte-face when it came to her personal happiness and the behavior of the rest, had not helped her to think differently. Time and again she had felt that she was an orphan and it was only the stars, that she thought her parents had become were her companions. That was why, when Arnav, who now has every right to consummate their marriage opts for the waiting game, she is confused. For, she had not received much in her life, selflessly. That is why she is unable to comprehend that she could be the recipient of such gestures. That is why she found Arnav's actions as an enigma, and Arnav Singh Raizada a tough nut to crack!  A riddle wrapped up in an enigma!

"And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even  more"
                                               ~ Erica Jong

That is why this is titled ENIGMA.
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.

Part 10: Day 4

Khushi woke up in the morning to see Arnavji looking down at her, a smile on his face.

She lay there looking at him, not knowing what to do, what to say. First it was a marriage that was not a marriage. Now they had a suhaag raat that was not a suhaag raat. What to do, what to do? she wondered, perplexed. And adding to this confusion was her need to have a suhaag raat when she was determined to leave him in 4 days. She sat up, determined to be businesslike.

But she needn’t have bothered.

 Arnav said, “Khushi, get up! We have a lot to do today!”

Khushi frowned. In a feeble voice, she asked, “We do?”

“Come on, Khushi. Get up!” he pulled her out of bed and pushed her towards the bathroom, shutting the door after her.

  

Khushi stared at herself in the mirror. She was Khushi Kumari Gupta, no, Khushi Arnav Singh Raizada, wasn’t she? She had gotten married last evening, hadn’t she? What was happening here?

“Khushi, make it fast!” he hollered.

“Aa rahi hoon!” she shouted back.

That evening, she walked in to the house on unsteady legs, her arms full of packages. Arnav followed her, cheerfully explaining to his family gathered in the living room that he had taken Khushi shopping.

Shopping? Was that what traipsing all over Delhi was called?

He had not left any place in Delhi unexplored, Khushi thought, wincing as she walked up the stairs. Like a whirlwind, he had carried her through tourist attractions, restaurants, shops…till her head had spun.

Khushi dumped the packets in their room, grabbed a pair of her casual clothes, waddled to the bathroom, had a shower, and dropped on to the bed.

Arnavji still hadn’t reached the room. How could he? If he was regaling his family with all the things they had done, all the sights they had seen,  it would take 2 years for him to finish.

She dropped off to sleep, exhausted beyond words.

Arnav came in a while later to see her asleep, lost to the world. He sat down by her, smoothed a strand of hair off her cheek, gathered her gently in to his arms, and hugged her close to his heart. He had tired her out. Deliberately. He had to do this for four more days…four more days..No, it was after 12. So three more days. So that she could decide with a clear head whether to stay with him or not.

The only thing he had not stolen from her was her innocence, and that he wouldn't, even if it killed him. She had to come to him, his in heart and mind, with no reservations, ready for a life together. Not out of any compulsion, not because he had mesmerised her by introducing her to her own sexuality or sensual pleasures, not because she felt a good wife had to stay with her husband, but because she wanted to. Because she couldn't even draw breath in his absence...

What would she decide after 3 days? Would she leave him and go to Buaji’s house?

Or would she realise that she couldn’t leave him behind where ever she went? That she would carry him with her, always, how much ever she tried to distance herself from him?

Would she stay back? Or would she go to Buaji’s house?

It was alright, he tried to calm himself. It was alright even if she went. Buaji’s house was only a few kilometres away. He could see her daily. And a couple of days of sleeping in separate beds, of not being together would make her realise how much she loved him, how much he loved her.

She would phone him, tell him that she missed him. And he would go to Laxmi Nagar and carry her off. Then they could go on a honeymoon, a long, leisurely honeymoon…

A smile relaxed his lips as he looked at the innocence of the sleeping face. He kissed her cheeks, breathing in her jasmine scent.

"I will wait for you, Khushi." he promised his sleeping wife. 


Smita,

Here is the interpretation to Part 10.
This update is about a state of suspense , a state of apprehension. It is ON TENTERHOOKS.
As Khushi woke in the morning, it was to see her Arnavji looking down at her with a gentle smile on his face mirroring his pleasant thoughts. He was an enigma! She was anxious as she knew not what to do, what to say, what to make out, seeing his volte-face. She now had an addled mind unable to think clearly. She was all avid to know why a man who had pursued her relentlessly for the past few days, not leaving any opportunity go by without letting her know how much he wanted her, how much he needed her, how much she meant to him, was now staying with her without consummating their marriage even on their wedding night! She was at a loss. Now they officially had a suhaag raat that was not one at all! She was bothered what she was to do. She was perplexed by his behaviour. And adding to her confusion was her need to have a suhaag raat, even when she was determined to leave in four days time. That had put her in a dilemma. Her already muddled brain was now in a stew. Her heart wanted to consummate their marriage but her mind told her that it was not preferable and she needed to get out in four days. It was a battle that had been raging inside her, each gaining an upper hand at one time or the other, only to result in status quo later and have her keyed-up. It was taxing her and to keep her sanity intact she got up from the bed, determined to be businesslike.

But she need not have bothered. For Arnav was not going in for any hanky-panky that day. He urged her to get up quickly as they had a lot to do by the end of the day! As a confounded Khushi frowned and asked meekly, they do?, he hurried her by pulling her out of the bed, shoving her into the bathroom and closing the door asking her, to get ready as soon as possible leaving her nonplussed.  A puzzled Khushi stared at her reflection in the mirror. She was Khushi Kumari Gupta, no, no, Khushi Arnav Singh Raizada, was not she? Last evening was her wedding. Was it not? Then what was happening? She was troubled and at her wits end unable to comprehend.  As she pondered looking at her reflection for some answers, she heard an impatient Arnav yell, to come out quickly, making her shout back, that she would as soon as she could.

That evening, it was a bamboozled Khushi who walked in, fatigued beyond belief. Being dead beat, her wobbly legs threatened to give away while her arms toted carry bags. Arnav followed her with a happy and contented look and with a sunny disposition explained to his family gathered in the living room, that he had taken Khushi shopping. She was breathless and wondered, whether that was shopping? Was that what traipsing all over Delhi was called? It felt more like an expedition, for he had not left any place in Delhi unexplored, while she winced as she climbed up the stairs. He had tugged her along and plunged in a headlong tour of all the tourist attractions, restaurants, shops without a respite. She had felt that as though she had been tossed in a whirlwind, and mystified as to what had caused this sudden spurt of interest to see around Delhi with her! Feeling weary and grimy, after all the trotting around, Khushi dumped the carry bags in their room and grabbing a pair of her home wear and a towel, pushing her erratic legs trudged towards bathroom, for a soothing shower. Once done, she plopped on to the bed. Seeing her Arnavji had not come in yet, anxiously waiting for him she thought to herself, how could he come so early if he was regaling his family with their activity of the day? They had packed in so much in a day that could take him hours together to furnish them with bare outline, forget about the details! As those thoughts poured in, exhaustion overtook; her lids drooped and were soon lulled into the arms of the Morpheus.

Arnav who had impatiently waited for her to drift off to sleep, entered in after a while. Sitting by her on the bed, smoothing over a willful lock of tress that had slipped from behind that lay caressing her cheek and eagerly tucked it behind her ears. Then he huddled her close to his heart, basking in the warmth. He had set out deliberately to tire her out and had to do it for four more days. Looking at the clock hung in the room, disquieted, he corrected himself; it was for three more days. He had to do it, so that when she takes any decision it was with a clear head.  She had to decide whether to stay with him or not, without any misgiving.

He thought uneasily, that had meddled with almost everything with her, except her innocence and that, he would not do even if it meant punishing himself. She was like a flower waiting to bloom and that blossoming had to come from within her, in her own time. Though on edge, he still thought, it had to be her decision with clear mind and conscience that held not even a small whiff of dark cloud in any nook and cranny, enabling her to come to him with both heart and mind in tandem, all set to embark on their life journey together. It should not be due to any compulsions. It should not be the result of being swayed by her sensual pleasures or by being introduced to her own sexuality. It should not be because she felt compelled to be a good wife and stay with her husband but should be because she wanted to and of her own free will. It had to be because she felt her need and not just his need. It should be because she felt that without him there was nothing for her to draw breath from.

He wondered apprehensively, as to what would be her decision in three days time? Would she leave him for Buaji's house? Or would she realize that her life was with him and she would never be able to leave him behind where ever she went? Will she realize that wherever she went, she would always carry him with her, with his image etched in her? Would she realize that she would never be able to distance herself from him when he already resides in her heart? The question will she stay back or will she opt to go to Buaji's house, left him foreboding, kept bouncing to and fro in his head. It held him on tenterhooks.

Though fearful, he tried to calm himself saying, that it was alright, even if she went, for Buaji's house was just a few kilometers away. He could see her daily, speak to her and a couple of days of sleeping separately, being away from one another was bound to make her realize how much she loved him and how much he loved her. Once she realizes it, she would call him and tell that she misses him badly and he would enthusiastically rush over to Laxmi Nagar and carry her off. Then, they could go on a long idyllic honeymoon. These thoughts comforted him, giving him hope and made a smile breakout on his face as he looked at the innocence of the sleeping face. Kissing her cheeks, breathing in her jasmine aroma, he promised his Sleeping Beauty expectantly that he would wait for her. Wait for her to come to him of her own free will. He was keeping his fingers crossed to know what was to happen. He was on tenterhooks.

In this update both are on tenterhooks.
Khushi is on tenterhooks not knowing why Arnav is behaving so and not knowing what she really wants.
Arnav is on tenterhooks with nervousness of not knowing what will be Khushi's decision and how it would shape their future, though he now has immense faith in his love for her and her love for him.

"You can give without loving, but you cannot love without          giving"
                                ~ Amy Carmichael

That is why this is titled ON TENTERHOOKS.
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.